Simmons Superbowl

[mat1419]

He's the best writer in sports, and nailed it again:

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/060206

[preppyak]

6:22 -- Tonight's celebrity coin tosser: The Football Jesus himself, Tom Brady. See, you can't have a Super Bowl without Belichick and Brady. Seattle calls tails, the toss is tails and they WILL receive - Brady even owns Pittsburgh in the coin toss.
ahahahaha

8:51 -- When ABC advertises "Sons & Daughters" as being "from the creator of Saturday Night Live," do they realize that "The Ladies Man," "A Night at the Roxbury," "Coneheads," "Stuart Saves His Family" and "It's Pat" traveled that same promotional road? Might want to rethink that one.
ouch
9:27 -- The old gadget play: A reverse to Randle El, who throws a 43-yard pass to Ward for a TD. 21-10, Steelers. Nobody uses those gadget plays better than Pittsburgh. And yes, it's pretty sad that Randle El was the best QB on the field tonight.
true

[tambo41187]

I love simmons and he got pretty much the whole game right.

[mat1419]

ahahahaha


ouch

true
i thought the brady line was classic

[preppyak]

i thought the brady line was classic
it's gold, now that I think about it, it's going in my sig

[mat1419]

it's gold, now that I think about it, it's going in my sig
haha

[bigmike]

bill simmons owns.

[splitsecond]

9:32 -- Tafoya tells us that Randle El warned her this week that the Steelers would try that reverse pass play. That's right, Michelle Tafoya just became the first woman in the history of mankind to successfully keep a secret. I'm just glad we were here to see it.

hahahaha

[asianxcore]

8:58 -- Random question: Have you ever seen John Madden's arms dangling by his sides? Has it ever happened? Would he tip over? Watch for this. Meanwhile, three-and-out for the Steelers. There hasn't been a momentum swing this damaging since Britney Spears met Kevin Federline.

hahaha

[asianxcore]

As Pittsburgh runs out the clock, Michaels tells us that Big Ben "got a lot of advice this week from Dan Marino ... One of the things Marino told him, 'Soak in every second.'" Wait, getting Super Bowl advice from DAN MARINO? Isn't that like getting sex tips from A.C. Green?

[CROMagnon]

the phone comment was priceless

(shakes head)

[sweethypocrisy]

absolutely perfect. what a great read.

[Drew Beringer]

Best part: 7:14 -- Just realized I probably could have gotten that ESPN phone for free instead of spending $236 on the Razor.

7:14 -- (Shaking my head.)

[ThriftWhore]

Goddamn I love his articles.

[kaskomm09]

Actually, Simmons article blew ass. Wasn't that funny.

DJ Gallo wrote a much funnier one...

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=gallo/060206

[mikeford]

the best part was seriously something that maybe 50 people total understood and that was the part about Wrentham, MA

[mat1419]

Actually, Simmons article blew ass. Wasn't that funny.

DJ Gallo wrote a much funnier one...

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=gallo/060206
shut up. i like gallo but shut up.

[fromwithin]

9:43 -- With six minutes left, the Steelers winning by 11, and hundreds of thousands of drunken Steelers fans already sobbing in delight, there's only one subplot left: Can Bettis finish the game off without keeling over, vomiting or sucking from an oxygen mask? That would have been a good gambling prop.

9:23 -- Well, the wheels just came off for the Hawks: A Hasselbeck sack, a horse-collar tackle on Alexander by Joey Porter that wasn't called (apparently you have to blow out someone's ACL to draw a flag on a horse-collar tackle, and nothing less)

8:38 -- Sitting on the left hash mark on Pittsburgh's 42, Seattle just went with the three-receiver offense, put the tight end on the right side, put two WRs on the right side, then ran Alexander left on the old cutback play for 21 yards. That one always works in "Madden," if you're playing against the computer, too! By the way, I'm 36 years old.

Greatest parts of an absolutely hilarious article. He bet for the Steelers and even he knew that the refs blew the game.

[mouood]

the best part was seriously something that maybe 50 people total understood and that was the part about Wrentham, MA

haha I loved that one.

[preppyak]

shut up. i like gallo but shut up.
yeah, the Gallo one is pretty uninteresting so far, and I'm up to point #6

for example, compare the two:


6:14 -- Performing our national anthem tonight: Aaron Neville, Dr. John and Aretha Franklin, who was apparently invited so that Jerome Bettis wasn't the heaviest person on the field.

8. The national anthem duet by Aaron Neville and Aretha Franklin was pretty good, but the NFL could have saved a few bucks and still achieved the same effect by using players. Shaun Alexander could have done a fair interpretation of Neville's voice, and Casey Hampton could have been an almost exact body double for Franklin. As could the Escalade that Hines Ward won as the MVP.

Simmons wins