Not Yet

[wyverna]

Unborn child with a McDonald's hat
What does the mother think of that?
No wonder the paycheck controls her mind
She's just one of a growing kind
All I want to do is to be who I am
When did this world define who I am?
It's all an act, too much to bare
I can't stand the way they pretend to care.
Mindless armies don't think for themselves
Plath got it right with her tables and shelves
They call it a culture, I think it's cause for concern
So I say,
Let it burn, let it burn, let it burn...





Personally, I don't think it's one of my best.

[a speedo model]

i like it.

[wyverna]

Thank you :)

[ArTkY_]

It's nice. I like it.

[OveriseFan]

it SUCKS

I HATE IT

KILL YOURSELF YOU LITTLE EMO!

[Chasing Suns]

it SUCKS

I HATE IT

KILL YOURSELF YOU LITTLE EMO!

....?

[Hilikus]

Honestly I am not a big fan of it, and the rhyme scheme is a part of it

[cris545]

I think you can do better, some phrases have been a bit overused, but it's not bad.