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View Full Version : and the madness ensues... [please comment]


caperucita.2x
09/18/09, 07:02 PM
Inside my mind, a lunatic sings my thoughts
With the voice of a veteran siren
The notes hover over my fingers
As I play the crude songs at the dead of night

Growing fond of the madness without rest
Eloquent beads of sweat slide down
Tangled words of lost years for show
As confusion strangles the pure sunrise

Strains of a chorus leaks through walls
Hitting the ears of the ones without a pair
The lost lullabies of mine kiss lone lips
Directing horrifically sweet conclusions to rest

A baby's cries to simply aged misery
Sounds to fit the black and white mind
The gray shrieks from either decision
Lacerated but switching sides to survive

The lonely words that rush through the halls
Leave trails of iced tears and youth
Off to find tinted views of perfected touch
As the madness ensues with savage tunes

caperucita.2x
09/21/09, 02:01 PM
can someone please comment? I'd like to have some constructive criticism.

Robin.
09/21/09, 02:08 PM
this doesnt rhyme at all..

caperucita.2x
09/21/09, 03:04 PM
it's not supposed to rhyme...