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ImpulZe
05/05/06, 11:38 AM
The Greatest War of all Time

We emptied out from hollow ground
to scavenge the empty streets
we poured out like a bleeding town
to weep in our defeat
we searched the great open plains
to find survivors of our kind
we live to fight, and fight to live
The greatest War of all Time




Opinons, I wanted to make this into a song and when I was writting it the "poem" above was the first verse, but then I was like, "hey it's more like a chorus" So I just left it at this, if anyone has Idea to make it into a song or better just let me know.

a speedo model
05/05/06, 12:07 PM
yeah, this could definitely be used in a song. i would suggest chorus. it's really good. work on it, expand it.

wyverna
05/05/06, 12:11 PM
It doesn't really appeal to me, sorry. Maybe it needs a bit more work?

ArTkY_
05/05/06, 03:22 PM
I enjoy this. Good work. Definetly works as a chorus.