View Full Version : Letting people down easy...
framebyframe
10/10/09, 10:11 PM
Stupid question, but I need help and I don't know who else to ask. I have two guys who I don't know that well who both like me, and I like them both a lot and they know this. One lives in my res, the other lives back home. The one that lives in my res asked me on a date and I'm pretty sure we're going to start dating soon after this. How do I let the other guy know without being a bitch? I don't want him to think I led him on...
mooshthedoosh
10/10/09, 10:14 PM
thats what u get for two timing someone
"Look, I really think you're a great guy, but I feel as if the distance would be too much of an obstacle in order for us to have a healthy relationship. I've recently started seeing someone here, too, and I can see myself being very happy in this potential relationship. I know it must feel shitty, but I hope you can at least be happy in the sense that you know I'm happy."
anthonydarko
10/10/09, 11:39 PM
There really is no option that won't involve hurting someone's feelings.
fallingheart
10/10/09, 11:50 PM
hahah had the same situation the other day. it sucks. idk how to talk to people like that, i feel so bad because i know they're going to feel bad
Roboman
10/11/09, 12:21 AM
Annnnd herein lies the problem that nearly all women seem to have - "I don't want to hurt him!" Spare the guy the agony and just tell him the truth.
introduction
10/11/09, 12:59 AM
i agree fully with the guy above me. it's like peeling a band-aid, you rip it off quickly, and it stings for a little bit and then it doesn't. the marks don't take long to fade either.
There really is no option that won't involve hurting someone's feelings.
this.
tis hard to tell someone that there's someone else but it's better to let them know than for them to find out later when you do start dating the other guy. either way they'll be hurt like that dude said but just tell him. kay? cool.
nerdvglc
10/11/09, 01:32 AM
Annnnd herein lies the problem that nearly all women seem to have - "I don't want to hurt him!" Spare the guy the agony and just tell him the truth.
aint that the truth!
mooshthedoosh
10/11/09, 02:35 AM
roboman is telling the truth. stop being pussies (like thats going to happen)
twisterisonfire
10/11/09, 02:46 AM
try to be honest to yourself and just tell that distant guy whole truth bout your feelings towards the one who lives in your res. There's lots of subjective opinions. If distant guy will think you're a bitch - it won't last long, because also he'll see that you've handled the deal like mature person. and it deserves respect.
rerelease_
10/11/09, 03:41 AM
try to be honest to yourself and just tell that distant guy whole truth bout your feelings towards the one who lives in your res. There's lots of subjective opinions. If distant guy will think you're a bitch - it won't last long, because also he'll see that you've handled the deal like mature person. and it deserves respect.
woah, nice to see people from ukraine here.
jeremypeele
10/11/09, 04:51 AM
fake your own death. over a period of time he will learn to move on.
denissuxx
10/11/09, 04:56 AM
fake your own death. over a period of time he will learn to move on.
This.
DaveZeroZero
10/11/09, 05:07 AM
fake your own death. over a period of time he will learn to move on.
Always a good plan.
kbi the crowing
10/11/09, 07:33 AM
Stupid question, but I need help and I don't know who else to ask. I have two guys who I don't know that well who both like me, and I like them both a lot and they know this. One lives in my res, the other lives back home. The one that lives in my res asked me on a date and I'm pretty sure we're going to start dating soon after this. How do I let the other guy know without being a bitch? I don't want him to think I led him on...
Annnnd herein lies the problem that nearly all women seem to have - "I don't want to hurt him!" Spare the guy the agony and just tell him the truth.
^^^ probably the best thing to do. & if you didn't lead him on tell him you didn't.
(and to the OP, sweet Amelie avatar)
Chancetobe
10/11/09, 08:48 AM
Yeah, I mean, tell him the truth ,but just tell him. And for the teller, I think it's sometimes easier over e-mail or text, even though that is kind of an asshole thing to do. Just, seems easier to say things when you don't actually have to say them.
chassmariee
10/11/09, 10:05 AM
Why does love always feel like a battlefield?
HometownHero
10/11/09, 10:17 AM
Three way
Sventhegreat
10/11/09, 10:47 AM
Why does love always feel like a battlefield?
You're so deep!
chassmariee
10/11/09, 10:55 AM
You're so deep!
d000d, I try! I try.
mooshthedoosh
10/11/09, 11:33 AM
d000d, I try! I try.
why is love in the bedroom like a battlefield? O.O
twisterisonfire
10/11/09, 11:45 AM
relates to the size of hoax...
yes?.......no?......no?....yes?
yes?
Chemical Swirl
10/11/09, 11:49 AM
Do cocaine. He'll definitely find you unattractive.
Chemical Swirl
10/11/09, 11:50 AM
Yeah, I mean, tell him the truth ,but just tell him. And for the teller, I think it's sometimes easier over e-mail or text, even though that is kind of an asshole thing to do. Just, seems easier to say things when you don't actually have to say them.
Don't do that. It's shallow and immature. Deal with shit in person.
You're not getting out of this without hurting someone. Best to just be honest and get it over with.
brokenwings
10/11/09, 12:57 PM
it's totally surprising that the word "anal" hasn't been mentioned yet.
AndrewIcex
10/11/09, 01:08 PM
For the record, distance is not something to keep from letting a relationship happen, its not impossible.
But it seems the distance is not the reasoning here, even though its stated in the OP.
4N6 science
10/11/09, 03:28 PM
Tell the other guy you're a lesbian now.
Mibabalou
10/11/09, 03:44 PM
anal 3 way
chassmariee
10/11/09, 03:55 PM
why is love in the bedroom like a battlefield? O.O
I guess it's not. I was high. lol
Chancetobe
10/11/09, 04:00 PM
Don't do that. It's shallow and immature. Deal with shit in person.
Depends on the situation. If you don't know someone that well, i think it's perfectly fine to do it over email.
You bitch, you lead him on.
geebee889
10/11/09, 05:30 PM
You just have to be honest with them, otherwise it'll make it so much worse. I've had that happen once before, and I swear it'll never go down like that again.
jmirand1
10/11/09, 06:11 PM
Just change your relationship status on Facebook and he'll take the hint.
If you do this, make sure you clarify who you're in the relationship with..that's very important..one of my friends was misled into a very embarrassing incident because a girl he was seeing changed her fb status when she started dating someone else.
mooshthedoosh
10/11/09, 06:18 PM
I guess it's not. I was high. lol
lovin youuuu is easy it comes so naturally lovin you is easyy oh, ohhh
JRenpwBHDvk
chassmariee
10/11/09, 06:27 PM
lovin youuuu is easy it comes so naturally lovin you is easyy oh, ohhh
JRenpwBHDvk
Hahaha. Noooo get her outta' here!
mooshthedoosh
10/11/09, 06:30 PM
Hahaha. Noooo get her outta' here!
NOO until you get me in your bedrooommmmm. ANAL secks <3
chassmariee
10/11/09, 06:39 PM
NOO until you get me in your bedrooommmmm. ANAL secks <3
We can have that ANAL 3way dude was talking about up there^, lots of anal sexcckss<33
mooshthedoosh
10/11/09, 06:45 PM
We can have that ANAL 3way dude was talking about up there^, lots of anal sexcckss<33
GREAT idea :-pX-)
chassmariee
10/11/09, 06:49 PM
GREAT idea :-pX-)
Are you implying anal dome?
mooshthedoosh
10/11/09, 06:56 PM
Are you implying anal dome?
sounds kinky! O.O
you just got to tell him so he can move on and find another hoochie to bang
framebyframe
10/11/09, 07:12 PM
But the thing is I've only met him in person like 4 times. And he wont stop texting me it's starting to creep me out. I NEVER see him. What if I slowly stop texting him... then I wont have to say anything to him, and he'll take the hint? Yes, I'm a huge pussy when it comes to confrontations like this. Hence me always getting in situations where I lead people on because I'm too scared to hurt them, even though it always ends up happening in the end.
geebee889
10/11/09, 07:14 PM
But the thing is I've only met him in person like 4 times. And he wont stop texting me it's starting to creep me out. I NEVER see him. What if I slowly stop texting him... then I wont have to say anything to him, and he'll take the hint? Yes, I'm a huge pussy when it comes to confrontations like this. Hence me always getting in situations where I lead people on because I'm too scared to hurt them, even though it always ends up happening in the end.
I'm the same exact way, and that's the way I handled this type of situation. Although I'm going to warn you, it ended up causing some drama on my end...which was not at all what I intended. It probably doesn't help that this guy is in one of my classes, so I see him twice a week.
trappedintime
10/11/09, 07:31 PM
Just tell him the truth. But lay it easy on him, just hard enough that he gets the hint... It's not the end of the world.
mooshthedoosh
10/11/09, 08:12 PM
But the thing is I've only met him in person like 4 times. And he wont stop texting me it's starting to creep me out. I NEVER see him. What if I slowly stop texting him... then I wont have to say anything to him, and he'll take the hint? Yes, I'm a huge pussy when it comes to confrontations like this. Hence me always getting in situations where I lead people on because I'm too scared to hurt them, even though it always ends up happening in the end.
Well Obviously the dude is super infatuated with you. The only way to make him stop is to tell him straight up.
framebyframe
10/11/09, 08:44 PM
Bleeeh I'm such a pussy. I can't do it. I feel way too bad. What if I just hint at me liking someone else? Like casually slip it into conversation? Is that a bad idea? I mean, I don't know the guy well and I'm 2 hours away in school and he's not. I also never told him that I liked him, but he did kiss me one time when we were drinking... I hate this. I need to grow a pairrr
I'm the same exact way, and that's the way I handled this type of situation. Although I'm going to warn you, it ended up causing some drama on my end...which was not at all what I intended. It probably doesn't help that this guy is in one of my classes, so I see him twice a week.
Aaah I don't want drama / him to hate me. I actually do like him, but the other guy I like just as much, and he happens to go to my school so I see him all the time and we get along really well.
geebee889
10/11/09, 08:50 PM
Bleeeh I'm such a pussy. I can't do it. I feel way too bad. What if I just hint at me liking someone else? Like casually slip it into conversation? Is that a bad idea? I mean, I don't know the guy well and I'm 2 hours away in school and he's not. I also never told him that I liked him, but he did kiss me one time when we were drinking... I hate this. I need to grow a pairrr
Aaah I don't want drama / him to hate me. I actually do like him, but the other guy I like just as much, and he happens to go to my school so I see him all the time and we get along really well.
Well, the guy this happened with is also a drama queen, and likes to make himself seem like the victim in every situation. If I were you, I would go ahead and just kind of casually bring it up. It'll only get worse the longer it gets dragged out, so I'd let him know as soon as you decide how to do it. Good luck! :-)
thumper7
10/11/09, 08:57 PM
just tell him the truth dont beat around the bush. its the best way. its going to hurt no matter what
framebyframe
10/11/09, 09:08 PM
Damnit.
llwilliamsll
10/11/09, 10:07 PM
Just have sex with him, and that's that. Then you can go on to date the other guy.
If you want to REEEEEALLY make him feel like trash, don't tell him about the situation for a while longer
Car Crash Dream
10/12/09, 09:40 AM
If there was an option there Max Bemis probably wouldn't be in a band.
mooshthedoosh
10/12/09, 09:47 AM
Damnit.
your indecisiveness makes me want to tickle your cooch <3 Lol too cute.
framebyframe
10/12/09, 12:44 PM
your indecisiveness makes me want to tickle your cooch <3 Lol too cute.
...
mooshthedoosh
10/12/09, 12:51 PM
...
what a cutie <3
argg_xo
10/12/09, 12:59 PM
fake your own death. over a period of time he will learn to move on.
the thread should have ended with this advice.
ps-i love your avatar!
jeremypeele
10/12/09, 01:12 PM
the thread should have ended with this advice.
ps-i love your avatar!
thank you!
DaveZeroZero
10/16/09, 06:53 AM
Bleeeh I'm such a pussy. I can't do it. I feel way too bad. What if I just hint at me liking someone else? Like casually slip it into conversation? Is that a bad idea? I mean, I don't know the guy well and I'm 2 hours away in school and he's not. I also never told him that I liked him, but he did kiss me one time when we were drinking... I hate this. I need to grow a pairrr
This is the answer.
kbi the crowing
10/16/09, 06:58 AM
If there was an option there Max Bemis probably wouldn't be in a band.
win
Smash Adams
10/16/09, 07:03 AM
draw a cute little picture, mr bunny says he only loves you as a friend, and to eat carrots too because they're healthy and shit
http://bp2.blogger.com/_h3pcJXrMakw/SH0CUdaOBRI/AAAAAAAAAZM/Kvld3xUeuJc/s320/The%20More%20You%20Know.jpg
songydarko
10/16/09, 09:17 AM
Gonna have to ignore the other guy, it's the only way with some guys.... Or you could be straightforward and be like wuddup man do not want. So that he doesn't waste his time.
framebyframe
10/16/09, 04:03 PM
He stopped texting me because I stopped being overly friendly. Maybe it will wok itself out .....
Trilogique
10/16/09, 04:37 PM
Make him think you floated around in a balloon. Hide in a box in the attic.
He'll forget about you in a couple days.
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