View Full Version : There might not be any feeling more humiliating
everyonesfault
10/26/09, 11:22 PM
and embarrassing, and generally hurtful, than to be told that you are "just a friend", especially when you want more than anything in the world to be with that person and see no reason why it couldn't be so. Fuck this.
/LJ
overdrive91
10/26/09, 11:25 PM
I think its happened to alot of people mate. Me included. I feel your pain but you can't really do nothing about it. There's always someone else.
everyonesfault
10/26/09, 11:31 PM
I think its happened to alot of people mate. Me included. I feel your pain but you can't really do nothing about it. There's always someone else.
It's particularly difficult to deal with when it comes from the mouth of your best friend of 6 years, 3 of which I have felt something resembling love for her. Whatever.
HometownHero
10/27/09, 12:00 AM
It's particularly difficult to deal with when it comes from the mouth of your best friend of 6 years, 3 of which I have felt something resembling love for her. Whatever.
Same thing happened to me recently. Yeah she doesn't even really talk to me anymore :-( I'm sorry dude. It really does suck. Chin up
Hehe, I know how that goes. Most girls see me as a shoulder to cry on or someone to get advice from so that's usually how the story ends with me too. It's nice helping people and knowing they see you as a good person but it's quite old to be just a good friend to basically every girl you meet.
and embarrassing, and generally hurtful, than to be told that you are "just a friend", especially when you want more than anything in the world to be with that person and see no reason why it couldn't be so. Fuck this.
/LJ
I took the opposite route. I told her I was going to ask her out and that she better turn me down hard so I could get over her and go back to just being friends. It may sound weird, but it worked. Mind you, not all girls are okay doing that. And it's ironic that she'd do it and prove just how great she is, but anyway :p
zion the lion
10/27/09, 12:21 AM
Being asked for a threesome by the person who supposedly loves you is way more humiliating. This coming from someone who went through something similar that whole situation.
Being asked for a threesome by the person who supposedly loves you is way more humiliating. This coming from someone who went through something similar that whole situation.
OOO story topping? Is that the game we're going to play?
zion the lion
10/27/09, 12:26 AM
OOO story topping? Is that the game we're going to play?
Nope, because I've already won. Seriously the threesome is way worse.
Nope, because I've already won. Seriously the threesome is way worse.
You can't really argue that. As a girl your opinion is totally different. How many guys do you think would cheer and probably orgasm a little if their girlfriend/wife/lover said "Want to have a threesome with me and another girl?"
zion the lion
10/27/09, 12:32 AM
You can't really argue that. As a girl your opinion is totally different. How many guys do you think would cheer and probably orgasm a little if their girlfriend/wife/lover said "Want to have a threesome with me and another girl?"
Yeah, and what if they said "Want to have a threesome with me and another guy?"
Yeah, and what if they said "Want to have a threesome with me and another guy?"
See, you know my dispositions by now. No one I'm dating would even consider that an option. Unless they were a bitch. Inwhich case, yes, you'd be right.
zion the lion
10/27/09, 12:34 AM
See, you know my dispositions by now. No one I'm dating would even consider that an option. Unless they were a bitch. Inwhich case, yes, you'd be right.
And why would they be a bitch for asking for a double dick threesome?
And why would they be a bitch for asking for a double dick threesome?
Hahaha, because sex means something to me, remember the conversation we had the other day? I don't deal well with other guys sleeping with the person I love. And they know that. I'd rather they dumped me and found other people. That may sound harsh. But still.
zion the lion
10/27/09, 12:38 AM
Hahaha, because sex means something to me, remember the conversation we had the other day? I don't deal well with other guys sleeping with the person I love. And they know that. I'd rather they dumped me and found other people. That may sound harsh. But still.
Ahh yeah, and if you dated a girl who asked you for the "good" threesome you would be okay?
Ahh yeah, and if you dated a girl who asked you for the "good" threesome you would be okay?
Having done that in a relationship, yes. Because we were both ok with it and it was her idea. That's completely different. I didn't mind her hooking up with girls as long as she told me she was going to do it before hand. But I didn't like it being guys. Thus, yes, it's ok. She wasn't happy with me hooking up with anyone, which I didn't mind because I didn't want to.
zion the lion
10/27/09, 12:46 AM
Having done that in a relationship, yes. Because we were both ok with it and it was her idea. That's completely different. I didn't mind her hooking up with girls as long as she told me she was going to do it before hand. But I didn't like it being guys. Thus, yes, it's ok. She wasn't happy with me hooking up with anyone, which I didn't mind because I didn't want to.
Whats the difference between her hooking up with another guy and her hooking up with a girl?
Sventhegreat
10/27/09, 12:50 AM
Sorry man. I know that shitty feeling.
Whats the difference between her hooking up with another guy and her hooking up with a girl?
My own insecurities. Nothing else. My insecurities make me believe she'll leave me for another guy. I knew her and knew she wouldn't do that, plus the girl she was hooking up with had a boyfriend as well. There's a lot to it. But basically what I'm comfortable and not comfortable with.
zion the lion
10/27/09, 12:56 AM
My own insecurities. Nothing else. My insecurities make me believe she'll leave me for another guy. I knew her and knew she wouldn't do that, plus the girl she was hooking up with had a boyfriend as well. There's a lot to it. But basically what I'm comfortable and not comfortable with.
What makes you think she wouldnt leave you for another girl though?
Jake Denning
10/27/09, 12:58 AM
No matter how cool of a dude you are, it happens to everyone.
What makes you think she wouldnt leave you for another girl though?
I know her, and I trust her. We actually just broke up because I'm leaving to go overseas. So it's a mute point now. But I trusted her, and knew her well enough to not do that. Sure, she might have done had we stayed together. Basically, there's a lot of stuff that is in this that I'd rather not go into on a public forum. Suffice it to say that I have never trusted someone as much as I trust her. Still.
zion the lion
10/27/09, 01:28 AM
I know her, and I trust her. We actually just broke up because I'm leaving to go overseas. So it's a mute point now. But I trusted her, and knew her well enough to not do that. Sure, she might have done had we stayed together. Basically, there's a lot of stuff that is in this that I'd rather not go into on a public forum. Suffice it to say that I have never trusted someone as much as I trust her. Still.
Okay. I trusted the guy I was with more than I trusted anyone else (which isnt saying much) but him bringing up the threesome was amazingly humiliating.
Okay. I trusted the guy I was with more than I trusted anyone else (which isnt saying much) but him bringing up the threesome was amazingly humiliating.
In that case I understand. I have a hard time trusting people. I never trust more than one or two people at a time and it normally takes me 6 months to trust that person in the first place. (I'm incredibly paranoid about people using my fears against me). So yeah, I understand, that sucks.
zion the lion
10/27/09, 01:41 AM
In that case I understand. I have a hard time trusting people. I never trust more than one or two people at a time and it normally takes me 6 months to trust that person in the first place. (I'm incredibly paranoid about people using my fears against me). So yeah, I understand, that sucks.
It wasnt even like I felt like he'd leave me for another person, he doted on me all the time. He's already been in 3 different threesomes, the only obvious reason to ask for another is because he found my body so disgusting that he couldnt get it up without another person there.
It wasnt even like I felt like he'd leave me for another person, he doted on me all the time. He's already been in 3 different threesomes, the only obvious reason to ask for another is because he found my body so disgusting that he couldnt get it up without another person there.
Oh well if you think about it like that. The other option is that maybe the thought just excited him. It most probably had nothing to do with you're looks. I have never had appearance issues so I don't understand how they work, but I have serious self-doubt. More so that, if she were hooking up with guys I worried she might find someone better where as, by hooking up with girls I'd always be different as I'm a guy.
Looking into what people say like that can only end badly. I'm on lexapro to counteract it. And I still end up a mess some days.
zion the lion
10/27/09, 01:59 AM
Oh well if you think about it like that. The other option is that maybe the thought just excited him. It most probably had nothing to do with you're looks. I have never had appearance issues so I don't understand how they work, but I have serious self-doubt. More so that, if she were hooking up with guys I worried she might find someone better where as, by hooking up with girls I'd always be different as I'm a guy.
Looking into what people say like that can only end badly. I'm on lexapro to counteract it. And I still end up a mess some days.
Why would it excite him? I mean he's done it 3 times already.
Why would it excite him? I mean he's done it 3 times already.
Exactly. He's done it more than once so he obviously enjoys it. And it's a male ego thing as well. The fact there are two girls willing to sleep with him must pump him up something horrible. Plus, our society forces us to believe that a threesome is like the holy trinity (see what I did there) of sex for a male.
And more to the point, I'm sure you do things you enjoy more than once right? I've seen season 4 of scrubs at least 20 times. Why? Because it cracks me up. I'm going to keep watching it. Because I can. The point that for him it's not as easily available as putting in a DVD so that means that there's a chase, a buildup to it as well.
(yes, I did just compare a threesome to watching Scrubs. Sue me)
zion the lion
10/27/09, 02:48 AM
Exactly. He's done it more than once so he obviously enjoys it. And it's a male ego thing as well. The fact there are two girls willing to sleep with him must pump him up something horrible. Plus, our society forces us to believe that a threesome is like the holy trinity (see what I did there) of sex for a male.
And more to the point, I'm sure you do things you enjoy more than once right? I've seen season 4 of scrubs at least 20 times. Why? Because it cracks me up. I'm going to keep watching it. Because I can. The point that for him it's not as easily available as putting in a DVD so that means that there's a chase, a buildup to it as well.
(yes, I did just compare a threesome to watching Scrubs. Sue me)
I kind of understand that.
Even if that was the case, its' still humiliating as fuck.
I kind of understand that.
Even if that was the case, its' still humiliating as fuck.
Oh, I understand that. But I think that it's quite possibly he got caught up in the idea of it and then hormones took over and he got excited and stopped thinking about your reaction. I know a lot of people like that. He didn't mean to humiliate you at all.
anamericangod
10/27/09, 03:59 AM
Oh, another Friend Zone thread.
Also, you're 17. You will be fine.
calling your teacher mum is pretty embarrassing though.
calling your teacher mum is pretty embarrassing though.
I did that in grade seven. In front of the entire class. That was not fun...
Oh, another Friend Zone thread.
Also, you're 17. You will be fine.
The only issue I have with people saying that is it is completely ok to keep saying it forever.
"Oh, you're only 23, you'll be fine"
"oh you're 40, don't worry about it"
"You're only 97, it'll be ok, there's lots of hot studs in heaven".
denissuxx
10/27/09, 05:16 AM
yeah that suxx
anamericangod
10/27/09, 05:26 AM
The only issue I have with people saying that is it is completely ok to keep saying it forever.
"Oh, you're only 23, you'll be fine"
"oh you're 40, don't worry about it"
"You're only 97, it'll be ok, there's lots of hot studs in heaven".
No, it's not completely okay to keep saying it forever. I didn't say that it didn't matter because he is 17.
Being in a relationship in your 20s, and your 40s, is obviously vastly different than a junior year one where your biggest concern is whether or not you are going to get fucked after prom or if the tri-board for your AP Biology presentation is going to get wet in the rain. For the most part, it is all very trivial.
hellogorgeous
10/27/09, 05:54 AM
No, it's not completely okay to keep saying it forever. I didn't say that it didn't matter because he is 17.
Being in a relationship in your 20s, and your 40s, is obviously vastly different than a junior year one where your biggest concern is whether or not you are going to get fucked after prom or if the tri-board for your AP Biology presentation is going to get wet in the rain. For the most part, it is all very trivial.
I miss those days.
sleepyseanzzz
10/27/09, 06:19 AM
yea seriously you're 17 you have plenty of time to find someone good
No, it's not completely okay to keep saying it forever. I didn't say that it didn't matter because he is 17.
Being in a relationship in your 20s, and your 40s, is obviously vastly different than a junior year one where your biggest concern is whether or not you are going to get fucked after prom or if the tri-board for your AP Biology presentation is going to get wet in the rain. For the most part, it is all very trivial.
I would agree with you on most part. But I know a couple, who are fourteen and are the most perfect couple ever. And I don't mean that in some weird way, I mean, you see those kids and they seem so much older than their years. It's insane. Just because he's seventeen doesn't mean his relationships are trivial. I'm 19, and my last relationship was anything but trivial. But I'll agree. 99% of the time, highschool relationships are a learning experience, and nothing more.
ilikesound93
10/27/09, 07:51 AM
I've had it too. The dude had a girlfriend, but I guess he knew for quite some time and didn't care to make a move, even before he found that girl. That sucked...
Charles777
10/27/09, 08:17 AM
Tell me about it.
argg_xo
10/27/09, 08:38 AM
Damn you friend zone threads! Everytime one of these is created/bumped I feel really gulity about putting some dudes in the friend zone. Thanks PL!
Hehe, I know how that goes. Most girls see me as a shoulder to cry on or someone to get advice from so that's usually how the story ends with me too. It's nice helping people and knowing they see you as a good person but it's quite old to be just a good friend to basically every girl you meet.
It happens to girls too.
So I get what both of you mean. I think.
Yellowcard2006
10/27/09, 09:15 AM
Damn you friend zone threads! Everytime one of these is created/bumped I feel really gulity about putting some dudes in the friend zone. Thanks PL!
You'll get no sympathy from me!
Dude that sucks, and it's going to suck for a while. Someday soon you'll move on and grow and hopefully find something better. You know what's worse? Her telling you that, and then getting a boyfriend a few weeks later.
Oh also I asked this girl I was friends with to go to homecoming with me, she said she's gonna go alone probably. Then she got a date. Also this same girl friend zoned me 2 years earlier. Or maybe 3.
If your're having girls problems, I feel bad for you son.
it sucks, trust me. i just tell myself "fuck it" and either write songs or take my mind off it.
makeshiftmind
10/27/09, 09:33 AM
being caught masturbating by your sisters' Filipino nanny and your step-mom is a much worse feeling
kraziivan23
10/27/09, 09:59 AM
You'll get no sympathy from me!
Dude that sucks, and it's going to suck for a while. Someday soon you'll move on and grow and hopefully find something better. You know what's worse? Her telling you that, and then getting a boyfriend a few weeks later.
Oh also I asked this girl I was friends with to go to homecoming with me, she said she's gonna go alone probably. Then she got a date. Also this same girl friend zoned me 2 years earlier. Or maybe 3.
If your're having girls problems, I feel bad for you son.
i hear you man.
woman are just plain hoes. out there just make lifes miserable
the best way to get back at her after this is to wait until your "friend" is asleep then whip it out and wait for her to wake up see what kinda "zone" you're in
argg_xo
10/27/09, 11:41 AM
You'll get no sympathy from me!
Dude that sucks, and it's going to suck for a while. Someday soon you'll move on and grow and hopefully find something better. You know what's worse? Her telling you that, and then getting a boyfriend a few weeks later.
Oh also I asked this girl I was friends with to go to homecoming with me, she said she's gonna go alone probably. Then she got a date. Also this same girl friend zoned me 2 years earlier. Or maybe 3.
If your're having girls problems, I feel bad for you son.
It's okay, I don't deserve it.
anamericangod
10/27/09, 12:54 PM
I miss those days.
I figured most of your relationships were still trivial. ;-)
AndrewIcex
10/27/09, 01:31 PM
You're not alone.
hellogorgeous
10/27/09, 03:00 PM
I figured most of your relationships were still trivial. ;-)
OUCH! That hurt, but a good zing anyway.
Nick Le
10/27/09, 03:11 PM
being caught masturbating by your sisters' Filipino nanny and your step-mom is a much worse feeling
Holy lol.
xmicxcorex
10/27/09, 03:25 PM
Having done that in a relationship, yes. Because we were both ok with it and it was her idea. That's completely different. I didn't mind her hooking up with girls as long as she told me she was going to do it before hand. But I didn't like it being guys. Thus, yes, it's ok. She wasn't happy with me hooking up with anyone, which I didn't mind because I didn't want to.
This fella knows his shit. we'll leave it at that.
Also, the line "let's go back to be being just friends" is much more tragic, IMO.
Waldorf
10/27/09, 03:31 PM
anal
chris1152
10/27/09, 03:40 PM
Main thing anybody who's friend zoned should do is look towards the sky, start setting personal goals, and start working towards them. If you spend your time as a single man (or woman) doing nothing but moping and feeling sorry for yourself, you aren't going to increase your chances of changing next time's outcome. If you work towards bettering yourself (in multiple aspects - health, image, confidence, conversation, flirting, wit) you'll be so much more set.
wendjiqn
10/27/09, 03:51 PM
how come i knew i'd see a fake zion the lion story upon entering this thread.
jmirand1
10/27/09, 04:00 PM
Nope, because I've already won. Seriously the threesome is way worse.
Yeah, there's nothing worse than threesomes.
WhitestKidUKnow
10/27/09, 04:02 PM
the best way to get back at her after this is to wait until your "friend" is asleep then whip it out and wait for her to wake up see what kinda "zone" you're in
hahhhahahahahah.
zion the lion
10/27/09, 04:37 PM
Oh, I understand that. But I think that it's quite possibly he got caught up in the idea of it and then hormones took over and he got excited and stopped thinking about your reaction. I know a lot of people like that. He didn't mean to humiliate you at all.
Probably. Yay you made me feel better.
calling your teacher mum is pretty embarrassing though.
I used to do this all the time in 1st grade, but that was because it was my first year in school and I was extremely attached to my mom.
Everybody would laugh at me when I did it, which is weird because they all had pissed on themselves at one point or another that year.
Yeah, there's nothing worse than threesomes.
Thanks for understanding.
musiclova
10/27/09, 08:11 PM
and embarrassing, and generally hurtful, than to be told that you are "just a friend", especially when you want more than anything in the world to be with that person and see no reason why it couldn't be so. Fuck this.
/LJ
I know the feeling... :(
it just kills you inside as soon as they say those few small words....
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