View Full Version : Dog Came In a Guy's Eye...
3wotkris
11/26/09, 06:25 AM
Ok so there's this guy in my street, like 19 years old, but he's really pervy and shit and an all round dick.
Thing is, my next door neighbour's dog is in season and when this guy was out with his friends the dog ran up to him and started humping his leg. This guy, being pervy as he is, thought it would be funny to let the dog carry on and laugh at it, until it came in his eye. Now his eye has been bloodshot for a week and he's on meds for at least 6 weeks.
Karma?
P.S. Yes this really is a true story. And yes I lol'd for a very long time.
PoweredbyPJ
11/26/09, 06:44 AM
wow, that's REALLY embarrassing
raychull
11/26/09, 07:04 AM
that's so gross I can't even muster up the place to laugh at that.
3wotkris
11/26/09, 07:13 AM
If you saw it happen, you would have laughed.
Otherwise, you probably don't have a soul
Jennurna Gray
11/26/09, 07:34 AM
Hahahahahahhahahahahahahaha. :P
warstory
11/26/09, 07:48 AM
meds because you got cum in your eye? I call bs.
iAMhollyood315
11/26/09, 07:59 AM
meds because you got cum in your eye? I call bs.
you can get an eye infection and shit.
warstory
11/26/09, 08:08 AM
you can get an eye infection and shit.
Yeah I figured it would irritate your eye but I guess an infection makes sense too. Dogs can be pretty nasty sometimes
atticus18244fss
11/26/09, 08:10 AM
"Oh why is your your eye red? You have pink eye?"
"Na... A dog came in my eye"
"wut."
abcdefghijake
11/26/09, 08:12 AM
how did it go from leg to eye...? That doesn't make sense.
drawndead
11/26/09, 08:22 AM
that dog must of had a hell of a shot then. i wanna meet this dog if its possible
sinkinginthesea
11/26/09, 08:29 AM
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/8a/507_cartman_redrocket.gif
3wotkris
11/26/09, 08:44 AM
how did it go from leg to eye...? That doesn't make sense.
It was an angle thing
The dog was humping away at the back of his leg and he turned around to look at it (like I said, pervert to the extreme) and he was like making all sorts of lame ass noises. And then it came , right in his eye. I don't know much about dog ejaculation but I figure the trajectory is pretty strong. It really was down to sheer luck (or lack of it for him I guess)
I'll try and get a picture of his eye for everyone, I still laugh everytime I see him
staciebx0
11/26/09, 08:45 AM
ahhahahaha what kind of dog was it?
.invisible ink.
11/26/09, 08:47 AM
Ok so there's this guy in my street, like 19 years old, but he's really pervy and shit and an all round dick.
Thing is, my next door neighbour's dog is in season and when this guy was out with his friends the dog ran up to him and started humping his leg. This guy, being pervy as he is, thought it would be funny to let the dog carry on and laugh at it, until it came in his eye. Now his eye has been bloodshot for a week and he's on meds for at least 6 weeks.
Karma?
P.S. Yes this really is a true story. And yes I lol'd for a very long time.
your avatar is my favorite picture of Butch Walker ever taken. Good choice.
I have nothing else to add to this thread.
ahhahahaha what kind of dog was it?
Haha, why does it matter? Have experience in the field?
3wotkris
11/26/09, 08:50 AM
He's a little jack russell, called Jack (which oozes originality...)
heroesofthepast
11/26/09, 09:41 AM
i saw the thread name and thought it was a waldorf thread. it wasnt. the dissapointment was overruled by the lulz the OP brought
Every time you see him talking to a girl you should just walk up to both of them and go "a dog came in his eye." and walk off.
3wotkris
11/26/09, 09:59 AM
Every time you see him talking to a girl you should just walk up to both of them and go "a dog came in his eye." and walk off.
haha, I would, but I don't think he really talks to many girls, hence the perviness and obvious sexual oppression. :/
codhoppers
11/26/09, 10:59 AM
I had a buddy in highschool who was getting head from his girlfriend, but she wouldn't let him cum in her mouth, so he pulled out every time. One time he waited a second to long and when he pulled out, cum flung out of his cock and hit him in the eye. Bloodshot for over a week, on meds and everything. Funniest thing I never saw happen
bladerdude360
11/26/09, 11:11 AM
Hahaha that's beautiful. That's a story to tell the grand kids.
re7ard1337
11/26/09, 12:23 PM
i forgot dogs were allowed to have balls. i haven't seen dog testicles in ages.
HelloxAlone
11/26/09, 01:03 PM
Hahaha, probably the funniest thing I've read today.
Waldorf
11/26/09, 01:29 PM
i saw the thread name and thought it was a waldorf thread. it wasnt. the dissapointment was overruled by the lulz the OP brought
wow why am i this famous
uh, nice story man
saysmydoctor
11/26/09, 01:34 PM
No psychiatrist?
heroesofthepast
11/26/09, 01:42 PM
wow why am i this famous
uh, nice story man
better question: why weren't you in new moon
Waldorf
11/26/09, 01:45 PM
better question: why weren't you in new moon
after a relative amount of contemplation, i have to say that i don't actually know
Fullblast
11/26/09, 02:14 PM
Who the fuck would want to be in New Moon........ Vampires suck
IntoTheSun
11/26/09, 02:19 PM
Who the fuck would want to be in New Moon........ Vampires suck
Yes, they quite literally do.
WhiteLies.
11/26/09, 02:20 PM
Edmond is the worst vampire of all time. He can't even turn into a bat!
3wotkris
11/26/09, 02:20 PM
i forgot dogs were allowed to have balls. i haven't seen dog testicles in ages.
Dog balls freak me out big time :/
heroesofthepast
11/26/09, 03:18 PM
after a relative amount of contemplation, i have to say that i don't actually know
its a vast government conspiracy
Who the fuck would want to be in New Moon........ Vampires suck
vampires are AWESOME all they do is have sex and kill people thats like my lifes goal its just twilight vampires that blow
Shin Akuma
11/26/09, 03:23 PM
how did it go from leg to eye...? That doesn't make sense.
69
samsara
11/26/09, 03:23 PM
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah a
...
Jasper112
11/26/09, 03:27 PM
OMG...this is insanely funny! hahahaha you have to write a novel on this somehow...and publish the shit out of it!
Jasper112
11/26/09, 03:30 PM
ahhahahaha what kind of dog was it?
hahaha, would it make a difference?
This shit is hilarious no matter what breed it was, SUPERlol!
zion the lion
11/26/09, 03:49 PM
hahaha, would it make a difference?
This shit is hilarious no matter what breed it was, SUPERlol!
Well if it's an average sized dog/breed, it's not as funny as if it's a really tiny dog or a gigantic one.
xmicxcorex
11/26/09, 03:53 PM
....wow.
jordo11
11/26/09, 04:03 PM
hahah this is so hot
3wotkris
11/26/09, 04:28 PM
OMG...this is insanely funny! hahahaha you have to write a novel on this somehow...and publish the shit out of it!
That would be a pretty short book :S
Fullblast
11/26/09, 04:38 PM
I used to have a Jack Russell Terrier, they are feisty motherfuckers.
miketheauthor
11/26/09, 05:59 PM
That's one of the funniest things I've ever read.
SouthernCross40
11/26/09, 09:35 PM
i forgot dogs were allowed to have balls. i haven't seen dog testicles in ages.
Bill Burr reference? "We had a dog with balls for 12 years, never had a problem...we never came home to him wearing a trenchcoat masturbating in the front yard."
I love that phrase "in season"...I think I'm going to use it to pick up chicks. They aren't responding to my blue balls complaints.
cccduncan1
11/27/09, 12:59 AM
ahhahahaha what kind of dog was it?
I hope it was one of those taco bell dogs. That would be hilarious. "Yo Quiero Taco Bell" There's some fire sauce you.
cccduncan1
11/27/09, 01:03 AM
I had a buddy in highschool who was getting head from his girlfriend, but she wouldn't let him cum in her mouth, so he pulled out every time. One time he waited a second to long and when he pulled out, cum flung out of his cock and hit him in the eye. Bloodshot for over a week, on meds and everything. Funniest thing I never saw happen
That is a pretty funny story but something you said creeped me out. You said you saw it hapen? did they know you were watching?
notfallingapart
11/27/09, 03:47 AM
I hope it was one of those taco bell dogs. That would be hilarious. "Yo Quiero Taco Bell" There's some fire sauce you.
Hahahahaha.
notfallingapart
11/27/09, 03:50 AM
That is a pretty funny story but something you said creeped me out. You said you saw it hapen? did they know you were watching?
He didn't watch it happen.
I had a buddy in highschool who was getting head from his girlfriend, but she wouldn't let him cum in her mouth, so he pulled out every time. One time he waited a second to long and when he pulled out, cum flung out of his cock and hit him in the eye. Bloodshot for over a week, on meds and everything. Funniest thing I never saw happen
MILFCORE
11/27/09, 06:36 AM
Who the fuck would want to be in New Moon........ Vampires suck
http://3.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kslpm8vi271qzl25jo1_400.jpg
MILFCORE
11/27/09, 06:45 AM
That would be a pretty short book :S
A children's book, maybe?
ace1112
11/27/09, 07:00 AM
lol shoulda done it doggy style
abcdefghijake
11/27/09, 11:00 AM
69
well that still doesn't answer my question, so I'm not even sure you know what that means.
re7ard1337
11/27/09, 11:39 AM
Bill Burr reference? "We had a dog with balls for 12 years, never had a problem...we never came home to him wearing a trenchcoat masturbating in the front yard."
maybe? i don't think i know who bill burr is. enlighten me.
Shin Akuma
11/27/09, 01:24 PM
well that still doesn't answer my question, so I'm not even sure you know what that means.
forget it then ;)
Jasper112
11/28/09, 03:16 PM
Well if it's an average sized dog/breed, it's not as funny as if it's a really tiny dog or a gigantic one.
haha ow shit, ur right that DID make if even funnier! hahahah
Urglegrew
11/28/09, 11:29 PM
hahahahaha oh man, i really want to see the picture of this guy. i lol'd so hard haha
Dark Whispers
11/29/09, 02:14 AM
Oh God... Lol's were had.
3wotkris
11/29/09, 06:52 AM
saw him today, his eye's still as red as ever and it apparently 'has swelling' on it :S haha
Didn't have my phone at the time though so no picture yet, sorry folks :(
Josh Weinstein
11/29/09, 11:14 AM
what does it mean he came in his eye
http://unrelatedcaptions.com/submissions/cat_uploads/a4b0b2ad642e88.jpg
AndrewIcex
11/29/09, 05:37 PM
Ummmm...
Sarcasm
11/30/09, 02:04 AM
hahahaha wat. That's gross.
limepomegranate
12/01/09, 07:06 PM
Hahahaha! What. A. Dumb. Ass.
xapplexpiex
12/01/09, 08:26 PM
It was an angle thing
The dog was humping away at the back of his leg and he turned around to look at it (like I said, pervert to the extreme) and he was like making all sorts of lame ass noises. And then it came , right in his eye. I don't know much about dog ejaculation but I figure the trajectory is pretty strong. It really was down to sheer luck (or lack of it for him I guess)
I'll try and get a picture of his eye for everyone, I still laugh everytime I see him
thanks for the mental image :-0
/sarcasm
hahah, funny story though.
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