"Looking". First Poem Posted

[Blake Solomon]

Ok. I have decided to post some poetry. I dont really have any training with it, but sometimes it helps to write things down. If you hate it, just tell me you dislike it greatly or something. Any comments would be appreciated, i feel that is just kind of jumbled together, let me know what you think. Thanks very much.
-Blake


“Looking”


The search for inspiration
Can be neverending.
To some, a curse,
To others, a treasure.

The trait of intelligence,
Can switch some on like a light,
Or chase lesser beings away.

I want to sound intelligent/creative,
But for the wrong reasons?
Do I feel like a waste
Without this poem?

If imitation is the highest form of flattery,
Why do I feel so dirty?

I am always looking for that perfect word,
That adjective, preposition or noun
That can make my thoughts come alive.

The search for one’s own style,
Be it clothes, speech, or tone
Can seem like a dead-end
A wall, filled with posters about
How to ACT, TALK, and WALK.

Well, I say, give me a
Sledgehammer.

[jusscali]

i kinda rather like it. i dont know if its in a poetic sense, but what you said in there made sense to me atleast, i know what your talking about.

good job

[Blake Solomon]

Thanks a ton. I dont really know how to write poetry, but the amazing thing about it is, that you can really call anything a poem. I appreciate your comment so much, and Im glad you see the point of it.

[OveriseFan]

When you attempt to tackle a subject like this, you need to move about in subtlety. You have none. You're giving the reader a point blank image, which, especially in this case, makes for boring writing. It's not bad, but it's a subject tackled by many (especially amateur) writers. I feel like you should have taken a metaphor and crafted this idea around it.

Also, there's no such thing as "training" in poetry. It comes to you.

[Blake Solomon]

When you attempt to tackle a subject like this, you need to move about in subtlety. You have none. You're giving the reader a point blank image, which, especially in this case, makes for boring writing. It's not bad, but it's a subject tackled by many (especially amateur) writers. I feel like you should have taken a metaphor and crafted this idea around it.

Also, there's no such thing as "training" in poetry. It comes to you.


Thanks for your comments. I decided to stray away from the metaphors because mine usually come out in a humourous way and I was trying to do something serious. Most of my poems before this were just little jokes, but I was testing myself to see if I could so a serious one. I will give it a try with some metaphors, I do think they will help open up interpretation.

[aCe_]

I like it. It's different.

[a speedo model]

i agree with james. keep it up, though....