Greatest pick up line?

[istillfeelher]

greatest pick up line you've heard personally or used that actually worked?

[phil19]

beam me up hottie

[Reaver]

beam me up hottie
lololol, I already love this thread.

[istillfeelher]

Wanna play carnival? You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh.

[phil19]

lololol, I already love this thread.

haha yeah, im predicting great things

[istillfeelher]

haha yeah, im predicting great things

I'm surprised this hasn't been done already :shrug:

[phil19]

I'm surprised this hasn't been done already :shrug:

i think there was a similar thread in general a while back??

if i gave you some sugar would you be like medicine and go down

[istillfeelher]

You have pretty eyeballs. Of course they'd be better if they were eying my pretty balls.

[Jaimehere]

"I don't want to know your name, I JUST WANT BANG BANG BANG!"

hYcBvB1bePs&feature=related

[Jennurna Gray]

"I don't want to know your name, I JUST WANT BANG BANG BANG!"

hYcBvB1bePs&feature=related
Gotta love that Group X.

[Jennurna Gray]

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Excuse me, Ms, is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?
If you cut your arms off, you'd look just like Venus de Milo.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
Inheriting eighty million bucks doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart.
Is it hot in here or is it just you?
Is your dad a thief? Then how did he steal the sparkle of the stars and put it in your eyes?
Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.
Hi, my name is . That's so you'll know what to scream.
Nice dress, can I talk you out of it?
Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
Pardon me, but what pickup line works best with you?
Pull my finger.
The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.
The first time is always the hardest.
Was your dad a farmer? Cause you sure have great melons.
Would you like Gin and platonic, or do you prefer Scotch and sofa?
You know what would look good on you? Me
Do you wash your pants in Windex? I can see myself in them.
Nice legs, when do they open?
That shirt looks rather becoming on you. If I were on you I'd be cumming, too.
I got F, C, and K. Now all I need is U.
Have you ever been raped? Would you like to change that?
You must be laundry cos I really gotta do you.
How do you like your eggs in the morning? Scrambled or fertilized?
Are you a chicken farmer 'cause you're sure raising my cock.

[Jaimehere]

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Excuse me, Ms, is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?
If you cut your arms off, you'd look just like Venus de Milo.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
Inheriting eighty million bucks doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart.
Is it hot in here or is it just you?
Is your dad a thief? Then how did he steal the sparkle of the stars and put it in your eyes?
Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.
Hi, my name is . That's so you'll know what to scream.
Nice dress, can I talk you out of it?
Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
Pardon me, but what pickup line works best with you?
Pull my finger.
The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.
The first time is always the hardest.
Was your dad a farmer? Cause you sure have great melons.
Would you like Gin and platonic, or do you prefer Scotch and sofa?
You know what would look good on you? Me
Do you wash your pants in Windex? I can see myself in them.
Nice legs, when do they open?
That shirt looks rather becoming on you. If I were on you I'd be cumming, too.
I got F, C, and K. Now all I need is U.
Have you ever been raped? Would you like to change that?
You must be laundry cos I really gotta do you.
How do you like your eggs in the morning? Scrambled or fertilized?
Are you a chicken farmer 'cause you're sure raising my cock.

omg, i'm glad i skipped all that and went directly to the bottom :lol:

[xxxpsxxx]

I read somewhere that jack barakat's favourite pick up line is :''Do me!!!'' haha gotta love that guy

[VeryWittyName]

"I can read braille. With my tongue."

[roughroads]

you better call the cops, cause your about to get raped

[istillfeelher]

you better call the cops, cause your about to get raped
indeed.

[JacobJOLTEON]

The word of the day is legs, so let's go back to my place and spread the word.

[Rock]

you better call the cops, cause your about to get raped
Haha. That's kind of scary.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Excuse me, Ms, is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?
If you cut your arms off, you'd look just like Venus de Milo.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
Inheriting eighty million bucks doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart.
Is it hot in here or is it just you?
Is your dad a thief? Then how did he steal the sparkle of the stars and put it in your eyes?
Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.
Hi, my name is . That's so you'll know what to scream.
Nice dress, can I talk you out of it?
Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
Pardon me, but what pickup line works best with you?
Pull my finger.
The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.
The first time is always the hardest.
Was your dad a farmer? Cause you sure have great melons.
Would you like Gin and platonic, or do you prefer Scotch and sofa?
You know what would look good on you? Me
Do you wash your pants in Windex? I can see myself in them.
Nice legs, when do they open?
That shirt looks rather becoming on you. If I were on you I'd be cumming, too.
I got F, C, and K. Now all I need is U.
Have you ever been raped? Would you like to change that?
You must be laundry cos I really gotta do you.
How do you like your eggs in the morning? Scrambled or fertilized?
Are you a chicken farmer 'cause you're sure raising my cock.
So, some individual has used each of these pick-up lines on you? Let's hope not, because some of these are some of the oldest in the book. Then again, if used as a joke, that could make them pretty funny.

[oneletteraway]

I'm a bit of a pervert and you aren't that good looking. We deserve each other. XD

[Deadbolt23]

Are any of these actually true stories?

[meroki22]

Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?

[tottivillarossi]

"Does this cloth smell of Rohypnol to you?"

[pierce007]

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

[pierce007]

Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?

Hahahaha I've seen that one before LOLOLOLOL

[JordanBuell]

"want to have sex and order a pizza?" when she says "no" you say, "what you dont like pizza?"

[ChelseaRiane]

My name aint Fred Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

[<*)))><]

Excuse me I lost my cat, but how would you like to be my new pussy?

[tottivillarossi]

My name aint Fred Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.
Did that work for you? Did you scream "WILMAAAA"?

[songydarko]

Wanna play carnival? You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh.

LOL Not okay.

[thesollopsist]

"Does this cloth smell of Rohypnol to you?"
You stole mine.

[krystofer]

is that a mirror in your pocket, or are you just gaining more weight?

[saveferris]

You hand a girl a sugar packet at a resteraunt and tell her she dropped her nametag.

[Charles777]

These are awesome.

"Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants"

[kwsqd]

These are awesome.

"Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants"
if the mirror is in the pocket, how can you see the mirror?

[tottivillarossi]

You stole mine.
I refute such accusations. You'll be hearing from my lawyer.

[Charles777]

if the mirror is in the pocket, how can you see the mirror?
...I don't know.

[kwsqd]

:-d

[Charles777]

Hey, I didn't make it up. haha

[overdrive91]

Do the come here finger gesture. When she approaches say, "Look i made you come with one finger, imagine what the rest of me can do"

[kwsqd]

Do the come here finger gesture. When she approaches say, "Look i made you come with one finger, imagine what the rest of me can do"
I heard this when I was 13, I don't think it'd work.

[Viva Sonata]

One of the less socially-adept kids in our group of friends once asked a girl, "Do you like salt?" He then got scared and ran off.

[overdrive91]

I heard this when I was 13, I don't think it'd work.

I don't think most pick up lines work.

[And Hours Pass]

"Does this cloth smell of Rohypnol to you?"
I believe it's "does this cloth smell like chloroform to you?"

Rohypnol usually comes in pill form and is the date rape drug you drop in somebody's drink. It wouldn't be breathed in as fumes.

[kwsqd]

I don't think most pick up lines work.
haha true, but sometimes they can start a conversation.

[4N6 science]

nice shoes, want to bang?

[TheReckoner]

I don't think most pick up lines work.
Unless you're Brad Pitt.

[tottivillarossi]

I believe it's "does this cloth smell like chloroform to you?"

Rohypnol usually comes in pill form and is the date rape drug you drop in somebody's drink. It wouldn't be breathed in as fumes.
Dude I didn't mean to patronise your pulling techniques. Sorry for my ignorance man.

[kbi the crowing]

You hand a girl a sugar packet at a resteraunt and tell her she dropped her nametag.

Do the come here finger gesture. When she approaches say, "Look i made you come with one finger, imagine what the rest of me can do"

never heard these, I like 'em
*mental note

I believe it's "does this cloth smell like chloroform to you?"

Rohypnol usually comes in pill form and is the date rape drug you drop in somebody's drink. It wouldn't be breathed in as fumes.

boosh

[And Hours Pass]

Dude I didn't mean to patronise your pulling techniques. Sorry for my ignorance man.
Just thought I'd clarify for you.

P.S. people in the states don't understand the phrase "pulling." I lived in AU for a year so I get it, but just a heads up.

[heyguys123]

by no means the greatest, but a funny one that stuck with me. i was out for dinner for some girl's birthday with a bunch of people. we're getting ready to leave and the girl is texting someone. this awkward looking little asian dude walks up to her and goes "i think somethings wrong with your phone. i'm not getting your texts"

[songydarko]

You hand a girl a sugar packet at a resteraunt and tell her she dropped her nametag.
That's actually kind of cute.

[Vanedarlingg]

You hand a girl a sugar packet at a resteraunt and tell her she dropped her nametag.
haha I like this one

[gr33ndayfr3ak]

Would you like to come to the pants party?

[kevinjordan]

You hand a girl a sugar packet at a resteraunt and tell her she dropped her nametag.

Now THAT seems classy.

There's always, would you like some fries with that shake? Usually followed up by a "bay-buh"...

[pound121]

do you work at subway? cause you just gave me a footlong
i will treat you like a snow storm, you will get 5 to 8 inches and you won't be able to leave your house for a week.
if i flip a coin what are the chances of me getting head.


you walk up to a girl and say "hey how much does a polar bear weigh?" and she will reply "i don't know" and you then you say "enough to break the ice nice to meet you."

[overdrive91]

Unless you're Brad Pitt.

Brad Pitt is the clit commander.

[a nocturnal day]

"We going to fuck or what?"

2/4-That's not a rating either..........

[overdrive91]

so I have a penis...and you have a vagina.

[Shatter_Glass]

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Excuse me, Ms, is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?
If you cut your arms off, you'd look just like Venus de Milo.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
Inheriting eighty million bucks doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart.
Is it hot in here or is it just you?
Is your dad a thief? Then how did he steal the sparkle of the stars and put it in your eyes?
Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.
Hi, my name is . That's so you'll know what to scream.
Nice dress, can I talk you out of it?
Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
Pardon me, but what pickup line works best with you?
Pull my finger.
The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.
The first time is always the hardest.
Was your dad a farmer? Cause you sure have great melons.
Would you like Gin and platonic, or do you prefer Scotch and sofa?
You know what would look good on you? Me
Do you wash your pants in Windex? I can see myself in them.
Nice legs, when do they open?
That shirt looks rather becoming on you. If I were on you I'd be cumming, too.
I got F, C, and K. Now all I need is U.
Have you ever been raped? Would you like to change that?
You must be laundry cos I really gotta do you.
How do you like your eggs in the morning? Scrambled or fertilized?
Are you a chicken farmer 'cause you're sure raising my cock.

So you personally heard all of these? wow, some top-shop blokes.
i'll bet the "Pull My Finger" worked like a charm then.... ;-)

[Shatter_Glass]

If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

I've actually used that, it's NEVER as an opener though...which most guys fail to realize how cheesy and lame one of the above lines are to a girl you doesn't even know you. but if you know that the girl gets your humor, and you use the line right. Fireworks my friends, fireworks.

[overdrive91]

The FBI are after my penis! I need somewhere to hide it!

[oneletteraway]

The FBI are after my penis! I need somewhere to hide it!

This. Is. Genius.

[overdrive91]

This. Is. Genius.

I saw it in a picture or someone said it. Not quite sure. Fucking laughed though.

[GhostFight]

wanna go halves on a baby?

[<*)))><]

Im an interior decorator, mind if I see if your drapes match the carpet?

[herestoyoufla]

wanna go halves on a baby?

this was so dumb, i actually laughed...

[rhinitus]

came up with this one about a week ago. ran it by some girl friends, they thought it was brilliant and very non-creepy. let me know your thoughts...

"so...what now?
this is where you can gauge if the girl is a bitch...if so, you can leave. but she'll probably say something along the lines of "i'm sorry, what?"
you reply with something along the lines of "what now? i already got your attention, so what do you want to talk about/let me buy you a drink/check out the size of my half-chub"

[argg_xo]

came up with this one about a week ago. ran it by some girl friends, they thought it was brilliant and very non-creepy. let me know your thoughts...

"so...what now?
this is where you can gauge if the girl is a bitch...if so, you can leave. but she'll probably say something along the lines of "i'm sorry, what?"
you reply with something along the lines of "what now? i already got your attention, so what do you want to talk about/let me buy you a drink/check out the size of my half-chub"

will totally work.

[rhinitus]

wanna go halves on a baby?

this is great...i've already said this to 3 girls at work in the last 2 minutes.

[<*)))><]

Hey I think I know you, your that girl I'm going to get sleep with in 10 minutes and then your going to shoot me in the morning when you find out I'm married and didn't use a condom.

[TheProsAndCons]

Did it hurt when you fell of my dick?

[NateFoundGlory]

Did it hurt when you fell of my dick?

I'm thinking if some chick literally fell onto my dick, I'd be the one hurting there for a few.

[CircaKnives]

After we got done playing at a bar in Iowa City, the bassist to the band I was with came up to me after talking to three girls, all of them totally drunk (including the bassist), and he says to me "The hottest thing a girl can tell you is 'I want to have your abortion'".

I will remember that forever.

[Buscemi Knows Best]

so I have a penis...and you have a vagina.

reminds me of the chorus to that rammstein song "pussy" with the awesomely nsfw porno music video

[Buscemi Knows Best]

wanna go halves on a baby?

best one hands down

[bladerdude360]

I've learned some things from this.

[concernedparent]

I'm pretty sure a pick up line has never worked ever.

[Deadbolt23]

I'm pretty sure a pick up line has never worked ever.

You're clearly doing it wrong.

[concernedparent]

You're clearly doing it wrong.
I've never used one. I've never even seen someone use one. They don't exist in the real world!

[Deadbolt23]

I've never used one. I've never even seen someone use one. They don't exist in the real world!

I've used them. I've seen them used.
What do you do?!

[overdrive91]

reminds me of the chorus to that rammstein song "pussy" with the awesomely nsfw porno music video

I love rammstein. I'm amazed that video was allowed haha.

[concernedparent]

I've used them. I've seen them used.
What do you do?!
I try to start conversations! I use witty observations and fart jokes!

[walshknilb281]

undefined

[<*)))><]

Excuse me I'm drunk and you will do.

[saveferris]

That's actually kind of cute.
Yeah, I got that one from the bass player of My Favorite Highway. He did it to some girl at Bojangles. It was actually pretty funny.

[songydarko]

Yeah, I got that one from the bass player of My Favorite Highway. He did it to some girl at Bojangles. It was actually pretty funny.
I'd definitely find it charming.

[vincelac]

Are you a dentist? 'Cause I want you inside my mouth...

[Ismael182]

Genius. Taking notes..

[overdrive91]

how bout the naked man? like how I met your mother...

[saveferris]

I'd definitely find it charming.
Really? Nice

[saveferris]

how bout the naked man? like how I met your mother...
2 out of 3 times.

[kbi the crowing]

I love rammstein. I'm amazed that video was allowed haha.

it was hosted on a porn site for a reason...
& iunno if you know, but it's not actually them

[<*)))><]

Do you have father issues?

[vincelac]

Are you a gynaecologist? 'Cause I want you to stick a metal rod in my vagina.

[about3fitty]

ted mosby. architect

[Ismael182]

Fuck me if I'm wrong, but haven't we met before?
If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street.

[Skillen]

What's the difference between; me and Jack the Ripper??? I'm called Richard. :-|

[crimsonandclovr]

did you just fart? because you blow me away.

[gabegr]

you make my software hardware

[pleasedontask]

Hey nice shoes, do me.

[jm105483]

my love for you is like diahria. cant hold it in.

[ReadyForAction]

I mentioned this in another thread but I'll post it here too

"hey baby, why dont you sit on my face and let me eat my way to your heart"

[vincelac]

Are you a dragon? 'Cause I want you to breathe fire on my scrotum.

[Deadbolt23]

Hi, my name's Jason Tate.

[Jennurna Gray]

So, some individual has used each of these pick-up lines on you? Let's hope not, because some of these are some of the oldest in the book. Then again, if used as a joke, that could make them pretty funny.
Haha, not all of them :P

[Jennurna Gray]

So you personally heard all of these? wow, some top-shop blokes.
i'll bet the "Pull My Finger" worked like a charm then.... ;-)
As a girl, I've even used a few, but most of the time that I've heard/used these, we weren't serious. I use the windex one on guys all the time. :)

[<*)))><]

http://shisymbolinternational.files.wordpr ess.com/2009/10/pickup-thumb.jpg

[Jennurna Gray]

http://shisymbolinternational.files.wordpr ess.com/2009/10/pickup-thumb.jpg
Was this directed towards me? <3

[<*)))><]

Was this directed towards me? <3
Of course by the way i love your profile picture. I wish you could be mine.

[Jennurna Gray]

Of course by the way i love your profile picture. I wish you could be mine.
I already am, duh. ;]

[<*)))><]

I already am, duh. ;]
I think your confusing yourself with a skank.

[Jennurna Gray]

I think your confusing yourself with a skank.
No, I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about.

[<*)))><]

No, I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about.
Well you do have my heart any day.

[ChelseaRiane]

Did that work for you? Did you scream "WILMAAAA"?

Ha my ex boyfriend said it to me. i just laughed

[Rock]

Haha, not all of them :P
Ahhh. It would appear, then, that you didn't read the OP's question and instead responded to the thread title alone. Tsk, tsk.

[overdrive91]

it was hosted on a porn site for a reason...
& iunno if you know, but it's not actually them

seriously? It looks like them.

[TheReckoner]

Brad Pitt is the clit commander.
lol, yup.

[vickasaur_xoxo]

Just thought I'd clarify for you.

P.S. people in the states don't understand the phrase "pulling." I lived in AU for a year so I get it, but just a heads up.

The only reason I understand it is because my bf was from the UK.
He made like this How to Look Good Pulling video and ended up dressing up like "Lady Gaga",
and screaming "it's not gay if you close your eyes.."

and that's when I broke up with him. XD

pshh. tranny.

[And Hours Pass]

The only reason I understand it is because my bf was from the UK.
He made like this How to Look Good Pulling video and ended up dressing up like "Lady Gaga",
and screaming "it's not gay if you close your eyes.."

and that's when I broke up with him. XD

pshh. tranny.
Is it bad if I found that hilarious?

[Deadbolt23]

The only reason I understand it is because my bf was from the UK.
He made like this How to Look Good Pulling video and ended up dressing up like "Lady Gaga",
and screaming "it's not gay if you close your eyes.."

and that's when I broke up with him. XD

pshh. tranny.

So....do you have his number?

:P

[vickasaur_xoxo]

Is it bad if I found that hilarious?

Not really, it was hilarious at the time.
Except he didn't make a very good Lady Gaga because he's was like 6' 5".
and the part about being gay..

which i'm pretty sure he was. hah XD

If I can find the link i'll post it, haha.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-UaSAXK1eU

[live.]

"So I'm at this rave in NYC, bro I'm TELLING you I went from a 7, to a 9, to a 10, to a 12, to a 15 outta 10...these girls were slammin', and here's how I got em: I would walk up to one with my glowsticks and say, 'Hey baby you want a light show?'...YES. After that I say 'Hey baby you wanna dance?'...YES. Next I get closer and go, 'Hey baby gimme a kiss?'...YES. Then after we dance for a while I pull her aside and say, 'Baby I can't really dance, but I'm a great fuck'...AND BOOM"
-- Anonymous drunken douchebag I met on a train.

[vickasaur_xoxo]

So....do you have his number?

:P

hah, actually I deleted it off my phone!
he was from Thatcham, in Berksire.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-UaSAXK1eU

[Deadbolt23]

hah, actually I deleted it off my phone!
he was from Thatcham, in Berksire.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-UaSAXK1eU

Wow.

[vickasaur_xoxo]

Wow.

Exactly my thought, lmao. XD

[Deadbolt23]

Exactly my thought, lmao. XD

How old was he then?

[vickasaur_xoxo]

How old was he then?

I believe either 15 or 16, but i'm leaning more towards 16.
I kind of forget when his birthday was, lol.

why?

[And Hours Pass]

Not really, it was hilarious at the time.
Except he didn't make a very good Lady Gaga because he's was like 6' 5".
and the part about being gay..

which i'm pretty sure he was. hah XD

If I can find the link i'll post it, haha.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-UaSAXK1eU
That. Was. Awesome.

[vickasaur_xoxo]

That. Was. Awesome.

haha, yeahh. agreed XD

[kbi the crowing]

seriously? It looks like them.

it's their heads on different guys

[overdrive91]

it's their heads on different guys

thought it was abit dodgy considering most are married.

[kbi the crowing]

thought it was abit dodgy considering most are married.

psshh they're German, it wouldn't have surprised me, horny bastards
/kidding

[overdrive91]

psshh they're German, it wouldn't have surprised me, horny bastards
/kidding
they have a very large porn industry...

[kbi the crowing]

they have a very large porn industry...

ours is bigger hahaha
which really isn't meant to be a brag

[<*)))><]

"So I'm at this rave in NYC, bro I'm TELLING you I went from a 7, to a 9, to a 10, to a 12, to a 15 outta 10...these girls were slammin', and here's how I got em: I would walk up to one with my glowsticks and say, 'Hey baby you want a light show?'...YES. After that I say 'Hey baby you wanna dance?'...YES. Next I get closer and go, 'Hey baby gimme a kiss?'...YES. Then after we dance for a while I pull her aside and say, 'Baby I can't really dance, but I'm a great fuck'...AND BOOM"
-- Anonymous drunken douchebag I met on a train.
Hmm I told someone a similar story once on a train. Although it what a blacklight party not a rave.

[kmart]

how bout this line: baby you ust work at subway cuz you just gave me a footlong., or how bout this one: your parents must be assholes cuz yur the shit

[ReadyForAction]

Hmm I told someone a similar story once on a train. Although it what a blacklight party not a rave.
douchebag

[showmethefever]

by no means the greatest, but a funny one that stuck with me. i was out for dinner for some girl's birthday with a bunch of people. we're getting ready to leave and the girl is texting someone. this awkward looking little asian dude walks up to her and goes "i think somethings wrong with your phone. i'm not getting your texts"
This one made me laugh.

[showmethefever]

how bout this line: baby you ust work at subway cuz you just gave me a footlong., or how bout this one: your parents must be assholes cuz yur the shit
Or go up to the girl and say "sk8 or di3". Then she'll be like "what?" and you can say "never mind, I listen to God awful music and think that calling your parents assholes and you their shit will get me laid"

[<*)))><]

Or go up to the girl and say "sk8 or di3". Then she'll be like "what?" and you can say "never mind, I listen to God awful music and think that calling your parents assholes and you their shit will get me laid"
A little mean.

[Viva Sonata]

Or go up to the girl and say "sk8 or di3". Then she'll be like "what?" and you can say "never mind, I listen to God awful music and think that calling your parents assholes and you their shit will get me laid"

Completely unnecessary.

[xxemo_kittyxx]

I remember something on TRL once where they had this game, whoever has the best pick up line gets to take her out. The guy who won said "I'm not good with this sorta stuff, but Green Day is playing tommorow night and I'll take you to see them if you want". Something like that.

Point is: free shows always work :)

[:-)]

My name aint Fred Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

Hahahaha I heard that song on the radio the other day

[Willy McFurgle]

You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

[vickasaur_xoxo]

"Are you Xena the warrior princess? Cause you just kicked the fuck out of my heart"

"If I was a wildabeast running through the hot savannah, you would be my watering hole."

"You must be a really good pokemon trainer.......no really you just kicked my ass at that duel"

"Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"

[jonny4star]

Are you a dragon? 'Cause I want you to breathe fire on my scrotum.

haha funny as hell.

[vincelac]

haha funny as hell.
I make up creepy pick up lines whenever I get bored.


Are you an animal? 'Cause I want to skin you and put you on my floor.

Are you a jacket? 'Cause I wanna hang you on a hook in my closet.
-or-
Are you a jacket? 'Cause I wanna wear you...

[<*)))><]

I make up creepy pick up lines whenever I get bored.


Are you an animal? 'Cause I want to skin you and put you on my floor.

Are you a jacket? 'Cause I wanna hang you on a hook in my closet.
-or-
Are you a jacket? 'Cause I wanna wear you...
Or
are you a jacket? cause you won't be sold during this bad economy .
or
are you a jacket? cause I want to wear you, then we can keep each other warm.

[vincelac]

Or
are you a jacket? cause you won't be sold during this bad economy .
or
are you a jacket? cause I want to wear you, then we can keep each other warm.
OR
Are you a jacket? 'Cause I'm erect.

[ReadyForAction]

"I'll love you the way your parents never did"

[<*)))><]

OR
Are you a jacket? 'Cause I'm erect.
Or are you a jacket? cause im a going to fuck the shit out of you.

[dustyfloors]

Couldn't bother to read through all this but my friend and I once did the "Haaaaaaaave you met Ted?" thing from How I Met Your Mother.

For those of you unfamiliar I'll explain.
I was standing talking to my friends in a bar. My buddy Rick notices this hot girl behind me. He starts talking to me and then suddenly taps her on the shoulder. She turns around. He says "Haaaaaaave you met Jim?" and walks away. Worked.

[vincelac]

Or are you a jacket? cause im a going to fuck the shit out of you.
OR.

Did I ever tell you that you remind me of a potato... because I want to mash you... in bed... with my penis...

[<*)))><]

OR.

Did I ever tell you that you remind me of a potato... because I want to mash you... in bed... with my penis...
Know what a is dickthrumping? Neither do I but lets make up its definition.

[vincelac]

Know what a is dickthrumping? Neither do I but lets make up its definition.
You're like a door... I want to slam your ass.

[<*)))><]

You're like a door... I want to slam your ass.
What is black and white and red all over? Your crime scene;-)

[vincelac]

What is black and white and red all over? Your crime scene;-)
Oh my god. I can't top this.

[<*)))><]

Oh my god. I can't top this.
Good try I have to admit you had me for a second but me being the person I am I always come ahead. Although I know your cool with losing after all you are from jersey.

[vincelac]

Good try I have to admit you had me for a second but me being the person I am I always come ahead. Although I know your cool with losing after all you are from jersey.
Haha, I'm not worried about it, I'm just happy to know I have a lot more pickup lines to use to creep people out.

[softhands]

can I stand with you until it's ok to go back over where I farted.

[pantagruel]

(to someone about to sit) may i push in your stool?

[mybreakingpoint]

have you tried an australian kiss?

it's like a french kiss...but down under.

[istillfeelher]

"want to have sex and order a pizza?" when she says "no" you say, "what you dont like pizza?"

i've actually tried this one before, as a joke.. but still..

[JesusOnXtc]

Ok I'm here! What were your other two wishes?

[gr33ndayfr3ak]

Hi, my name's Jason Tate.

Can't believe this one went unnoticed. Hilarious.

[Metal Now]

Are you a jacket? Because I'm cold.

Also, would you enjoy fucking me later on?

[<*)))><]

Haha, I'm not worried about it, I'm just happy to know I have a lot more pickup lines to use to creep people out.
I also recommend if going to use them wear a fake mustache, never failed for me.

[hells army]

my love for you is like diarrhea, i cant hold it in

[<*)))><]

Screw me if I'm wrong, but have we met before?

Sex is not the answer, "Sex?" is the question... "Yes" is the answer

You're like a slinky completely useless, but fun to push down stairs.

My love is so great that a thousand men could not keep me from stalking you.

I'm putting the "Sensual" in "Non-Consensual"

I like my women the way i like my coffee; Ground up and in the freezer

If you are what you eat, then I'm fast, cheap and easy

Roses are red, Bullets are lead, you better love me, or i'll shoot you in my bed

[Laural666]

Wanna play carnival? You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh.

Lmao!

[S9Dallasoz]

"Did you grow up on a chicken farm? Cause you sure know how to raise cocks."

[Hamlet]

Does this smell like chloroform to you?

[robat19]

have you tried an australian kiss?

it's like a french kiss...but down under.
this one wasn't very funny.

[Jaimehere]

Does this smell like chloroform to you?

:lol:

[mybreakingpoint]

this one wasn't very funny.
i disagree.

[vincelac]

Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got fine written all over you.

[jonny4star]

I make up creepy pick up lines whenever I get bored.


Are you an animal? 'Cause I want to skin you and put you on my floor.

Are you a jacket? 'Cause I wanna hang you on a hook in my closet.
-or-
Are you a jacket? 'Cause I wanna wear you...



I'm not gay.....but i believe these pick up lines would work on me..

[Viva Sonata]

Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks, lick on these nuts and suck da dick. Just get the fuck out after ya done.

[Spewk]

If you don't have sex with me, I'll kill myself.
Oh shoot, I messed that up! Let me start over...
If you don't have sex with me, I'll kill you.

[Deadbolt01]

I'm putting the "Sensual" in "Non-Consensual"

yes yes yes.

[<*)))><]

yes yes yes.
Thank you.

[klawansie7]

my love for you is like diarrhea, i cant hold it in
i acutally heard some guy in like 8th grade use this on a girl... they ended up dating.

[SLoT]

This actually worked for me: "Nice shoes." Not only did it work in one of my college photography classes to a fellow student, but it also worked on a girl that used to be a cheerleader for the Bucs. Excellent times. The key to this working so well is the following... when you say it look down at her shoes. She will obviously look down to see what shoes she is wearing (because woman are just like that), but here's the "kicker" make sure you have some outlandish shoes on that she will take notice of, and respond to. Therefore starting your conversation from the ground up. Try it out, thank me later.

[istillfeelher]

This actually worked for me: "Nice shoes." Not only did it work in one of my college photography classes to a fellow student, but it also worked on a girl that used to be a cheerleader for the Bucs. Excellent times. The key to this working so well is the following... when you say it look down at her shoes. She will obviously look down to see what shoes she is wearing (because woman are just like that), but here's the "kicker" make sure you have some outlandish shoes on that she will take notice of, and respond to. Therefore starting your conversation from the ground up. Try it out, thank me later.
Ingenious! :shiftyeyes:

[Jennurna Gray]

have you tried an australian kiss?

it's like a french kiss...but down under.
lol

[Jennurna Gray]

These are awesome.
"Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants"
if the mirror is in the pocket, how can you see the mirror?

You can't, it's 'Do you wash your pants in Windex? I can see myself in them'

[-karla]

he was from Thatcham, in Berksire.


one of my mates lives there. wonder if he knows your said ex-tranny boyfriend. thatcham is only a small town after all...

[SunnyInPhilly]

I like my women the way i like my coffee; Ground up and in the freezer

This one made me lol.

[<*)))><]

This one made me lol.
Then you are a terrible person and no one will ever play night crawlers with you.

[salt1384]

is that a mirror in your pocket, or are you just gaining more weight?

FAIL. The better one is: "Is that a mirror in your jeans because I can see myself in your pants." :)

[MissVampire]

OMG, Michael "the situation" from Jersey Shore says the cheesiest pickup lines, but it works. Every episode he has a new girl.

[<*)))><]

Lets make like fabric softener and snuggle.

[po0ty]

OMG, Michael "the situation" from Jersey Shore says the cheesiest pickup lines, but it works. Every episode he has a new girl.

Yea, and you are talking about Jersey Shore.

[rising_tied]

I like my women the way i like my coffee; Ground up and in the freezer

If I had any type of beverage in my mouth, it would now be located all over my laptop

[nphizzle]

hello, my name is Tucker Max.

[Jasemin]

heylo < my fav line

[steveC]

do you work at subway? cause you just gave me a footlong
i will treat you like a snow storm, you will get 5 to 8 inches and you won't be able to leave your house for a week.
if i flip a coin what are the chances of me getting head.


you walk up to a girl and say "hey how much does a polar bear weigh?" and she will reply "i don't know" and you then you say "enough to break the ice nice to meet you."

my favorite post thus far lmao

[Roton7]

I like my women the way i like my coffee; black

fixed

you walk up to a girl and say "hey how much does a polar bear weigh?" and she will reply "i don't know" and you then you say "enough to break the ice nice to meet you."

About a year ago I was really trying to get this one girl's attention, so I used this line. She thought it was pretty good, and we started talking regularly after that.. but then she began playing hard to get. So not worth it.

[therukus]

you better call the cops, cause your about to get raped


HAHAHAHAHSAGHJL:SKFJHDgfh

[Hamlet]

"Don't make me turn this rape into a murder."

[vickasaur_xoxo]

one of my mates lives there. wonder if he knows your said ex-tranny boyfriend. thatcham is only a small town after all...

Yeah, a pretty small town.
His name is Chris Dillon, if you want to ask.

[pound121]

i want to tickle your belly button...........from the inside.
i want to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like the crown you are.

[argg_xo]

i want to tickle your belly button...........from the inside.
i want to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like the crown you are.
These only work if you are Francios Dillinger.

[wildrocks90]

hahhhaha all funny

[Mirrors Shatter]

Is that a banana in your pocket or is that a boner in your pocket?

[<*)))><]

You have such amazing tits that I want to be reincarnated as your child so that I can breastfeed by you until I'm 20.
That outfit would look great crumpled in a heap on unsolved mysteries
"I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U..."
Hi, I'm the new Milkman. Do you want it in the front or the back?

hey lets go have sex with monkeys and rape their corpses.

[ReadyForAction]

Couldn't bother to read through all this but my friend and I once did the "Haaaaaaaave you met Ted?" thing from How I Met Your Mother.

For those of you unfamiliar I'll explain.
I was standing talking to my friends in a bar. My buddy Rick notices this hot girl behind me. He starts talking to me and then suddenly taps her on the shoulder. She turns around. He says "Haaaaaaave you met Jim?" and walks away. Worked.
I just got into the show and I'm dying to try this


You're like a slinky completely useless, but fun to push down stairs.

I'm putting the "Sensual" in "Non-Consensual"
Thread winners

Does this smell like chloroform to you?
I've tried this before, and girls dont find it nearly as funny as I do

hello, my name is Tucker Max.
works 100% of the time

[<*)))><]

I just got into the show and I'm dying to try this


Thread winners


I've tried this before, and girls dont find it nearly as funny as I do


works 100% of the time
I post some way better ones then these. I like the what is black and white and red all over.

[ReadyForAction]

I post some way better ones then these. I like the what is black and white and red all over.
That was another favorite of mine, its not a competition man, as long as women everywhere are being hit on by men who use ridiculous lines, the game continues.

[C0olGuY1o1]

sup bitch? wanna get d1rty?

[istillfeelher]

sup bitch? wanna get d1rty?

tru dat.

[<*)))><]

That was another favorite of mine, its not a competition man, as long as women everywhere are being hit on by men who use ridiculous lines, the game continues.
You're right competitions involve a challenge and I always win.

[xapplexpiex]

"If you were a booger, I'd pick you first." -my 11 year old brother to a twenty-something at the mall.

[xapplexpiex]

you better call the cops, cause your about to get raped
I need to try this one sometime.

[pound121]

indeed you are correct kind sir

[roughroads]

I need to try this one sometime.

60% of the time, it works every time

[Under The Knife]

"Tell me, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

"If I had skittles in my mouth, would you come and taste the rainbow?"

[Fulltime Mike]

hey, do you see that guy over there??..... he wants to know if you think I'M cute.

[overdrive91]

XgPWFPJmqiw

[onelastdisaster]

you better call the cops, cause your about to get raped

favorite.

[Viva Sonata]

Scene girl pickup line:

Hey, I know Jonny Craig and he's hanging out in the alley out back. Wanna go meet him?

This is interchangeable with Craig Owens, that guy from NSN!, etc.

[Under The Knife]

Scene girl pickup line:

Hey, I know Oli Sykes and he's hanging out in the alley out back. Wanna go get pissed on?

Fix'd

[Viva Sonata]

Fix'd

Haha. Oli's a fucking champ.

[<*)))><]

XgPWFPJmqiw
I would think the scuba diver is better.

[overdrive91]

I would think the scuba diver is better.

This is so much funnier though. The "she's not coming" is fucking hilarious as well.

[<*)))><]

This is so much funnier though. The "she's not coming" is fucking hilarious as well.
The Lorenzo Von Matterhorn is part of the scuba diver.

[overdrive91]

The Lorenzo Von Matterhorn is part of the scuba diver.

well it started it. van matterhorn was a play from the playbook though, right?

[<*)))><]

well it started it. van matterhorn was a play from the playbook though, right?
Yeah but you needed the Von Matterhorn to pull off the scuba diver, without it is worthless.

[overdrive91]

Yeah but you needed the Von Matterhorn to pull off the scuba diver, without it is worthless.

Noted. i love the snasa one as well haha.

[<*)))><]

Noted. i love the snasa one as well haha.
I want to try one of these, sad part is I bet they would work. I like the one were he dressed up as an old man said he was from the future, need her help to solve global warming by sleeping with his past self. Different episode but still amazing.

[overdrive91]

I want to try one of these, sad part is I bet they would work. I like the one were he dressed up as an old man said he was from the future, need her help to solve global warming by sleeping with his past self. Different episode but still amazing.

Its genius. The "he's not coming" would be hilarious as well but a major notch on the belt if it worked.

[<*)))><]

Its genius. The "he's not coming" would be hilarious as well but a major notch on the belt if it worked.
Indeed but don't you think someone would call the cops sooner or later.

[overdrive91]

Indeed but don't you think someone would call the cops sooner or later.

Probably. Pick the most distressed looking girls i guess.

[<*)))><]

Probably. Pick the most distressed looking girls i guess.
Yeah I guess but still there is some sort of moral gray area that that might be rape.

[Roton7]

needs moar lines

[<*)))><]

needs moar lines
You're the kind of man that deserves to have a women you don't deserve.

[Under The Knife]

Hey guys, I need to get your opinion on something. It's very important, and we need a woman's perspective. It's a matter of life and death.. My friend and I were having a debate and your answer could completely change my entire life.... Do you brush before floss or floss before brush? No one knows.

I don't know who you're boyfriend is...but he's not spanking you enough!

[moosehas spoken]

Did you just fart? Because you blew me away.

[ilikesound93]

The word of the day is legs. Now let's go over to my place and spread the word.

[miketheauthor]

you better call the cops, cause your about to get raped


Dude this ones worked for me like four times.

[<*)))><]

The punch and blame the news

First you see a hot girl without a boyfriend go up to her and punch her really hard, try to show off your biceps and your smile. Then help her up and tell her I'm sorry I didn't mean to punch you but I'm just so mad about Haiti how could they let this happen. Shows you are strong, you care and you are willing to beat the crap out of her if she says no to sex.

[limepomegranate]

"You need to give me some of that pot so me and this girl can smoke and intertwine like snakes."

Probably the creepiest one i've ever heard...

[po0ty]

"You need to give me some of that pot so me and this girl can smoke and intertwine like snakes."

Probably the creepiest one i've ever heard...

That is pretty fucking creepy.

Might try it.

[limepomegranate]

That is pretty fucking creepy.

Might try it.
Ewwwweeee

[joeyjoey]

"You need to give me some of that pot so me and this girl can smoke and intertwine like snakes."

Probably the creepiest one i've ever heard...
You'd need to pay me alot to say something that awkward.

[davehennessy]

"You need to give me some of that pot so me and this girl can smoke and intertwine like snakes."

Probably the creepiest one i've ever heard...

If anyone can get this one to work, I will pay them.. cash

[Echo Park]

"I'm Chuck Bass"

[limepomegranate]

If anyone can get this one to work, I will pay them.. cash

You'd need to pay me alot to say something that awkward.
Haha

[joeyjoey]

"I'm Chuck Bass"
I chuckled.

[davehennessy]

"I'm Chuck Bass"

This is great hahaha