Of Debts and Failed Gambles

[ArTkY_]

I wrote this very randomly and spur of the moment. Its soooo cheesy, but I don't feel like editing it. So... love it, hate it, whatever.

Oh baby don't give me the
"its gonna be okay," face
because I know, I know
nothing's gonna be alright
We've played this through before
and that's why its come down to this
you're no faker
My problem is
I never seem to play my cards right
Adn I guess that you could say
that I'm down to my last queen of hearts
And I've poured my insides out on this couch
I've painted this while upholstry red
I guess that's why they call my style abstract

Fin.

I'll throw this in a song someday.

[a speedo model]

hmm..i'm not sure. i didn't really like the first part, up to the "you're no faker" line, it just felt like a collection of cheesy lines. i'd suggest you work on those. the rest after that was pretty good, i thought. not your best. but i think this could be put into a song very nicely. and i absolutely love the last line.

[wyverna]

I hate that 'nothing's gonna be alright'. It just screams out boyband cliché to me. The rest of it is ok, just a little bland and nondescript, I think. I like the last few lines though, from 'I never seem to play my cards right'.