IAmNietzche
02/12/10, 11:49 AM
Not only does this article make me want to see this movie, it's also the funniest thing I've read on the interwebs.
http://www.cracked.com/blog/return-of-the-jcvd/
The survival rate for characters in this movie is so low that people still die when you have it paused. There are no periods in the script because every sentence gets finished with a knife in the neck or an exploded chest. There was so much fake blood on the set that they had to film it from canoes. The board game Travel Operation has more respect for human life than Universal Soldier: Regeneration. It’s like Jean-Claude Van Damme set out to create the first truly honest documentary of where Happy Meals come from.
This movie really thought about how a perfect soldier would kill someone, and decided it wouldn’t be very complicated. For example, five people are killed by a super soldier sitting on them and punching their face until it’s soup. Five. And these killings don’t take place off-camera while we hear sloppy thuds and see the horrified face of an onlooker. We ARE the horrified face of an onlooker.
http://www.cracked.com/blog/return-of-the-jcvd/
The survival rate for characters in this movie is so low that people still die when you have it paused. There are no periods in the script because every sentence gets finished with a knife in the neck or an exploded chest. There was so much fake blood on the set that they had to film it from canoes. The board game Travel Operation has more respect for human life than Universal Soldier: Regeneration. It’s like Jean-Claude Van Damme set out to create the first truly honest documentary of where Happy Meals come from.
This movie really thought about how a perfect soldier would kill someone, and decided it wouldn’t be very complicated. For example, five people are killed by a super soldier sitting on them and punching their face until it’s soup. Five. And these killings don’t take place off-camera while we hear sloppy thuds and see the horrified face of an onlooker. We ARE the horrified face of an onlooker.