View Full Version : Girls love to make such a big deal out of small unimportant stuff
crushlustcrash
02/18/10, 09:11 AM
This is going to make me sound so lame but i really really need an objective point of view so here it goes.
So I have been dating this guy for almost a year, we used to be best friends so we have known each other for quiet a long time. Anyways, when we started going out for like 4 months or so I gave him a mixtape and one of the song there is " First Day Of My Life" by Bright Eyes. I dont know how but somehow this song became "our song". I have loved this song so long and its THE song for me. I just love everything about it and I gave it to him as "our song". Then few months ago he asked my friend that is a girl to sing the song with him on one of his show as a tribute to that girl's boyfriend's birthday.
HE ASKED HER TO SING THE SONG TOGETHER!
I know there is no need for the caps to go on action but still probably how my silent scream would sound.
Then I told him I don't like it and he said sorry and said no matter how i see it its just a song.
I dont know why but i got really mad at myself for giving him the song and now I cant even listen to it. I hate him everyday for killing the song for me.
Two months later, we're still dating and I still cant get over it.
My question is, why can't I just get over it? Am I over reacting? Am I going to be those girls that drags everything and cry when their bf forgot to say happy v-day?
whoaisame
02/18/10, 10:51 AM
I get what you're saying, but you are overreacting a little. If it's been 2 months and he hasn't left you for her or anything, let it go.
reformryan
02/18/10, 11:10 AM
Chill, not a big deal
Urglegrew
02/18/10, 11:12 AM
k.
If your boyfriend forgot to say happy Valentine's day, then he is just stupid. And yes you're being melodramatic, just find another song. Preferably by Gwar.
deFobbed14yrs
02/18/10, 11:13 AM
there's an underlying problem that you are not addressing and this small matter is being used as a diving point
/dr. phil
voncorn
02/18/10, 11:15 AM
This thread sucks and your problem is stupid. You're way overreacting, just straight up. Conor Oberst would be ashamed.
mikelmc
02/18/10, 11:23 AM
Can you sing? Didn't think so. That's why he asked her.
Just because YOU like the song, doesn't mean he has to hold it on some kind of all mighty platform.
aamberlynn
02/18/10, 11:58 AM
k.
You should be slapped.
And youknow, I get where you're coming from, but he's a guy and probably thought NOTHING of it. If he liked the song that YOU gave him ebough to sing it in front of people the song itself means something to him, and the one who gave it to him, not nessicarily the girl that he sang it with. If it'a been two months and he hasn't mysteriously fallen in love with this other girl then you're fine.
timbedinosaur
02/18/10, 12:04 PM
Tough love time.
Cry me a river. Get off the cross. Take the wood. Build a bridge. Get over it.
rosielikesyou
02/18/10, 12:12 PM
You seem to be the only one holding the song up on a pedestal. It's fine to love a song in that way - don't assume he shares the sentiments. Too much sentimental value on something paired with ignoring personal circumstances is a nasty formula.
CobraLucha
02/18/10, 12:13 PM
If your boyfriend forgot to say happy Valentine's day, then he is just stupid. And yes you're being melodramatic, just find another song. Preferably by Gwar.
Yeah. Get some new sex positions from them too...
PutUpOrShutUp77
02/18/10, 12:19 PM
That Song is great,
<*)))><
02/18/10, 12:26 PM
If it sounds like an overreaction it is an overreaction.
ReadyForAction
02/18/10, 12:31 PM
man up
bladerdude360
02/18/10, 01:22 PM
It's because you're a crazy person.
limepomegranate
02/18/10, 01:55 PM
This is going to make me sound so lame but i really really need an objective point of view so here it goes.
So I have been dating this guy for almost a year, we used to be best friends so we have known each other for quiet a long time. Anyways, when we started going out for like 4 months or so I gave him a mixtape and one of the song there is " First Day Of My Life" by Bright Eyes. I dont know how but somehow this song became "our song". I have loved this song so long and its THE song for me. I just love everything about it and I gave it to him as "our song". Then few months ago he asked my friend that is a girl to sing the song with him on one of his show as a tribute to that girl's boyfriend's birthday.
HE ASKED HER TO SING THE SONG TOGETHER!
I know there is no need for the caps to go on action but still probably how my silent scream would sound.
Then I told him I don't like it and he said sorry and said no matter how i see it its just a song.
I dont know why but i got really mad at myself for giving him the song and now I cant even listen to it. I hate him everyday for killing the song for me.
Two months later, we're still dating and I still cant get over it.
My question is, why can't I just get over it? Am I over reacting? Am I going to be those girls that drags everything and cry when their bf forgot to say happy v-day?
I can see your point but it's been over 2 months...it's time to let it go because as of now you are REALLY overreacting.
Laural666
02/18/10, 02:14 PM
I'd feel the same way.
muzicislife31
02/18/10, 02:19 PM
I know it feels really hurtful, and I know it's hard to change the way it makes you feel, but I'm sure he didn't think of it that way just saw it as a good song to sing. A song is a song. Your relationship with each other is much more important than a song, so if you have a good relationship you should focus on that and try not to let the song thing get to you anymore.
Maiaophilia
02/18/10, 02:22 PM
This is going to make me sound so lame but i really really need an objective point of view so here it goes.
So I have been dating this guy for almost a year, we used to be best friends so we have known each other for quiet a long time. Anyways, when we started going out for like 4 months or so I gave him a mixtape and one of the song there is " First Day Of My Life" by Bright Eyes. I dont know how but somehow this song became "our song". I have loved this song so long and its THE song for me. I just love everything about it and I gave it to him as "our song". Then few months ago he asked my friend that is a girl to sing the song with him on one of his show as a tribute to that girl's boyfriend's birthday.
HE ASKED HER TO SING THE SONG TOGETHER!
I know there is no need for the caps to go on action but still probably how my silent scream would sound.
Then I told him I don't like it and he said sorry and said no matter how i see it its just a song.
I dont know why but i got really mad at myself for giving him the song and now I cant even listen to it. I hate him everyday for killing the song for me.
Two months later, we're still dating and I still cant get over it.
My question is, why can't I just get over it? Am I over reacting? Am I going to be those girls that drags everything and cry when their bf forgot to say happy v-day?
I see your point. I'm just like you. That's something I wouldn't get over either.
Its something that has to be talked about with him in order for you to fix it for yourself. --
like maybe go... I know you think it's just a song, but it was OUR song and it meant a lot to me and it really hurt me when you asked another girl to sing it with you. I know its simple and has probably been said, but the key to any relationship is communication. I think if you talk about it, you'll understand his reasoning and that will finally help you get over it.
losnoufy
02/18/10, 02:23 PM
Tell him you're pissed he sang a song with another girl, and stop trying to tell yourself that it's because of the particular song he sang. It's because it was with another girl. You're 20? Are you still in high school? I'm not trying to be a dick, it just seems like a high school problem to me. Wake up a little bit. I say that in the least condescending way possible.
cory-182
02/18/10, 03:11 PM
I can't stand shit like this, but from what I've learned about women, its that they are all like this.
Get used to it.
Smash Adams
02/18/10, 03:20 PM
d63qarhRa24
really_lovely
02/18/10, 03:23 PM
Be careful. If you keep this issue going, two months after the fact, your boyfriend is likely to become irritated with you at what seems like a completely innocent situation.
It's normal that it would initially bother you seeing someone else onstage with someone you care about singing a song that holds great sentiment to you. But if it was just a tribute to the girl's boyfriend, perhaps your guy invited her to sing because it would have made the performance all the more meaningful for him (meaning the other girl's boyfriend -- I hate overusing personal pronouns.)
Deadbolt23
02/18/10, 03:29 PM
overreacting.
http://someloosethoughts.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/overreaction1.jpg
And Hours Pass
02/18/10, 03:46 PM
Can you sing? Didn't think so. That's why he asked her.
Just because YOU like the song, doesn't mean he has to hold it on some kind of all mighty platform.
You seem to be the only one holding the song up on a pedestal. It's fine to love a song in that way - don't assume he shares the sentiments. Too much sentimental value on something paired with ignoring personal circumstances is a nasty formula.
Listen to these two.
Be careful. If you keep this issue going, two months after the fact, your boyfriend is likely to become irritated with you at what seems like a completely innocent situation.
It's normal that it would initially bother you seeing someone else onstage with someone you care about singing a song that holds great sentiment to you. But if it was just a tribute to the girl's boyfriend, perhaps your guy invited her to sing because it would have made the performance all the more meaningful for him (meaning the other girl's boyfriend -- I hate overusing personal pronouns.)
Here's a nicer, rational way to put it. Either way, all 3 of these folks are right. And for my two cents, holding on to this for 2 months is a super overreaction. let it go.
Two Headed Girl
02/18/10, 04:17 PM
I think a better song for you is "Hey Jealousy" by the Gin Blossoms.
Formatfun
02/18/10, 04:28 PM
That was a douchebag thing for him to do. You have to forgive him sometime though.
Echo Park
02/18/10, 04:31 PM
Two months later, we're still dating and I still cant get over it.
My question is, why can't I just get over it? Am I over reacting? Am I going to be those girls that drags everything and cry when their bf forgot to say happy v-day?
im not trying to knock you down or anything, but the reason you can't get over it is because of your maturity level. Both of you sound immature. Unless he's a complete dunce, he knows that it was your song. So he should understand that you are angry. That's where he's showing his immaturity. You on the other hand should let it go. Call me a cynic, but small things like that don't bother me. i cant get into "nothing" fights with girls anymore, it's too common. Girl im dating got angry because i offered her a Red Bull and it made her anxious. Shit like that doesn't even phase me. She can sulk in a corner somewhere
Jealousy is a double edged sword. It shows you care but when it's over trivial bullshit like this it's just stupid. I would tell you to just "get over it" but I don't know the circumstances of your relationship. If it were me I would have been completely aware that it was "our song" and probably hesitant to sing it..but like I said I dunno.
This thread sucks and your problem is stupid. You're way overreacting, just straight up. Conor Oberst would be ashamed.
hahahahahahahaha.
this is the most ridiculous problem i have ever heard. wait till he starts fucking the girl he was singing with. there's your problem.
I can't stand shit like this, but from what I've learned about women, its that they are all like this.
Get used to it.
women are goddamn nuts.
ari telescope
02/18/10, 06:53 PM
This is going to make me sound so lame but i really really need an objective point of view so here it goes.
So I have been dating this guy for almost a year, we used to be best friends so we have known each other for quiet a long time. Anyways, when we started going out for like 4 months or so I gave him a mixtape and one of the song there is " First Day Of My Life" by Bright Eyes. I dont know how but somehow this song became "our song". I have loved this song so long and its THE song for me. I just love everything about it and I gave it to him as "our song". Then few months ago he asked my friend that is a girl to sing the song with him on one of his show as a tribute to that girl's boyfriend's birthday.
HE ASKED HER TO SING THE SONG TOGETHER!
I know there is no need for the caps to go on action but still probably how my silent scream would sound.
Then I told him I don't like it and he said sorry and said no matter how i see it its just a song.
I dont know why but i got really mad at myself for giving him the song and now I cant even listen to it. I hate him everyday for killing the song for me.
Two months later, we're still dating and I still cant get over it.
My question is, why can't I just get over it? Am I over reacting? Am I going to be those girls that drags everything and cry when their bf forgot to say happy v-day?
quoted so you'd make sure to check this
Can you sing? Didn't think so. That's why he asked her.
well he picked her cause the whole point was that it was he boyfriends' birthday.
hahahahahahahaha.
this is the most ridiculous problem i have ever heard. wait till he starts fucking the girl he was singing with. there's your problem.
Obviously, crushlastcrush, don't listen to this fucking dick.
The one thing I am thinking that no one has stated is the song specifically. Do you know that song is like, EVERY couples' song? That's why they picked it to sing to her boyfriend, it's THE couple song. Maybe if the song was by some obscure artist that you told him about, I could see (it happened to me in high school once and drove me crazy), but The First Day Of My Life? It's kinda everyones... I'd bet good money that song also means alot to your friend and her boyfriend. Move on, sweetie, if he's still treating you great and therelationship is all about the two of you, then maybe the two of you can pick a new song, one that means something to him as well. Chin up.
barkingincision
02/18/10, 07:32 PM
you listen to bright eyes. thats yr problem.
katiep1088
02/18/10, 07:41 PM
Like just about everyone else has said, you are definitely overreacting. It might be something that would bother me for, like a couple of hours at first, but the feeling sure wouldn't last 2 months.
crushlustcrash
02/18/10, 08:13 PM
Well come to thought of it I am overreacting. I know this problem sounds ridiculous but idk it just bothers me somehow.
But oh well right? Thanks for the feed backs : )
I'll get over it.
onelastdisaster
02/18/10, 08:40 PM
I definitely understand where you're coming from. I can definitely see that bothering me too, at least a little bit. But it's probably a bit of an overreaction. Like others said, if it's been 2 months and he's still with you then I'm sure you're fine.
But I definitely get ya.
Obviously, crushlastcrush, don't listen to this fucking dick.
no by all means get upset over something small, and then when he actually does something worth getting upset about, she will be able to deal with it fine (sarcasm).
I definitely understand where you're coming from. I can definitely see that bothering me too, at least a little bit. But it's probably a bit of an overreaction. Like others said, if it's been 2 months and he's still with you then I'm sure you're fine.
But I definitely get ya.
he was clearly singing it for his guy friend? it's not like he joined in on a threesome?
you listen to bright eyes. thats yr problem.
woah! hold on there.
mikelmc
02/18/10, 08:49 PM
Let me try to get your boyfriend out of the dog house:
Maybe, he understands why the song means so much to you, and he sang it, with that guys girlfriend, to help the girl express how much she loves her boyfriend.
To me, that's a compliment to you. Knowing the strength and unity of the song for a relationship, he used it to help someone express their love.
To YOUR boyfriend:
Checks and money orders can be mailed to...
ari telescope
02/18/10, 09:35 PM
no by all means get upset over something small, and then when he actually does something worth getting upset about, she will be able to deal with it fine (sarcasm).
Oh really? Were you being sarcastic? You were? Oh okay, thanks for clearing that up.
Loyaltabk
02/18/10, 09:53 PM
calm the ovaries, woman
songydarko
02/18/10, 10:03 PM
Eh, I probably wouldn't love that happening either. Understandable.
onelastdisaster
02/18/10, 10:24 PM
he was clearly singing it for his guy friend? it's not like he joined in on a threesome?
Wow, don't be a dick. I'm not saying I'd be pissed out of my mind- just saying it would make me wonder. But then I'd deal. Just like she has, apparently.
Holding onto stuff like that will only be to your disadvantage in life. Gotta learn to let that crap go, it's not really that big of a deal in the long run.
Oh really? Were you being sarcastic? You were? Oh okay, thanks for clearing that up.
i was also able to make a valid point which you seemed to ignore.
Wow, don't be a dick. I'm not saying I'd be pissed out of my mind- just saying it would make me wonder. But then I'd deal. Just like she has, apparently.
im not being a dick, there are so many worse things that could happen. if you baby someone when something mundane happens, how does that prepare them for something serious happening, and it will happen.
showmethefever
02/18/10, 10:39 PM
Yeah, I'd let it go seeing as you're being weird and clingy and immature. This is really unimportant and if I had to listen to you whine about this for two months I'd get rid of you. Start worrying about more important things.
onelastdisaster
02/18/10, 10:56 PM
im not being a dick, there are so many worse things that could happen. if you baby someone when something mundane happens, how does that prepare them for something serious happening, and it will happen.
obviously worse things can happen. i thought she made that clear by titling this thread "girls love to make such a big deal out of small unimportant stuff." she knows it's not huge but i'm assuming she wanted to see if anyone else would maybe understand where she was coming from. i don't see what the big deal is, here.
Jennurna Gray
02/19/10, 04:41 AM
I can see why you'd be upset about the song, but two months is a long time to stay mad. If my boyfriend was mad at me for two months, I'd be able to sense it. I'd break up with him.
Chill out.
oh...rly
02/19/10, 04:44 AM
i cant get into "nothing" fights with girls anymore, it's too common. Girl im dating got angry because i offered her a Red Bull and it made her anxious. Shit like that doesn't even phase me. She can sulk in a corner somewhere
Yeah, I'd let it go seeing as you're being weird and clingy and immature. This is really unimportant and if I had to listen to you whine about this for two months I'd get rid of you. Start worrying about more important things.
:rotfl:
Christrings
02/19/10, 05:53 AM
man up
So many of life's little problems can be solved with this.
I'm sorry, but in this case you need some brutal honesty - you're being completely ridiculous. Grow up!
You said he sang the song with a girl for her boyfriend. Why are you griping over this. Its your song together and he was using it as a romantic gesture to allow another couple to share something together. Sounds like you jumped the gun. Calm down, listen to the song with him again, forget all about it.
I can totally understand you. you tell him how you feel and he is all like 'I don't care bitch, get over it'. you should think carefully if you wanna put up with that big ego of his.
Kassie09
02/19/10, 07:43 AM
I get mad about the stupidest small things so thus I'd be a passive aggressive bitch for a few days..but then I'd get over it. But I'd also be like "WTF WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!"
Like, he should have dedicated it to YOU not her bf.
venomousheart
02/19/10, 08:12 AM
well you have a right to be mad. after all he sang your (meaning you as a couple) song with another girl. i'd be pretty pissed too. maybe there was a little overreaction there. you have a right to still be mad, and still feel hurt, so long as you don't constantly bring it up and say "hey i'm still pissed about that" because that's immature. if your still together, then its obviously he obviously meant nothing by it, and you can let it go. i hope you can learnt o love the song again soon.
raychull
02/19/10, 10:26 AM
Why isn't this in the advice thread?
Thesleepingwell
02/19/10, 10:54 AM
Why isn't this in the advice thread?
+1
HometownHero
02/19/10, 11:40 AM
he's probably written songs about other girls hundreds of times and you're okay with that. So this is no big deal
AndrewIcex
02/19/10, 11:51 AM
If this is your biggest problem. Life must be good.
Domcakes
02/19/10, 12:47 PM
Get a better song get a better life.
Miss Heartcore
02/19/10, 01:23 PM
I understand what you're saying but he asked her to sing it for her boyfriend, not for her or to her, so that's a plus. I wouldn't worry about it.
ari telescope
02/19/10, 02:03 PM
i was also able to make a valid point which you seemed to ignore.
Yeah I had my valid rebuttal, but you're too childish to worry about. Stop talking to me now.
Yeah I had my valid rebuttal, but you're too childish to worry about. Stop talking to me now.
you have more than reconfirmed the title of this thread.
ari telescope
02/19/10, 07:56 PM
you have more than reconfirmed the title of this thread.
OOOOHHHHH cause like the thread title, cause it's about girls who... Yeah and you think girls are stupid and, the title and I'm a girl... Oh okay yeah I see, I see. That is just like, so hilarious, you need to teach a class on cleverness I think. Just... So do you have any more? Cause you're just like, really really witty. Like, insanely witty.
Edit: No, yeah... That was just... Really good, really good.
Michifoxx
02/20/10, 06:51 AM
That sucks he killed the song for you. I'd be really mad at that
Read this...it's fun...and is somewhat on the topic and might aid you!
http://raysweb.net/poems/articles/tannen.html
HeyItsChelsea
03/14/10, 06:55 AM
Ok most girls don't make a big deal out of small stuff. It just seems like small stuff to you. Lots of stuff that's small to guys is big stuff to girls.
tottivillarossi
03/14/10, 07:27 AM
What's the deal with giving people mixtapes?
Sharkboyyy!
03/14/10, 08:33 AM
Ok most girls don't make a big deal out of small stuff. It just seems like small stuff to you. Lots of stuff that's small to guys is big stuff to girls.
...and the 13 year olds have entered the building.
On the note of the topic, though...really, it's no big deal. I'm sure he thought what he was doing was an entirely harmless gesture and upon finding that you were upset probably didn't give him too much time to feel bad about it because he was too busy trying to figure out what he did wrong in the first place.
AndrewIcex
03/15/10, 10:37 PM
Ok most girls don't make a big deal out of small stuff. It just seems like small stuff to you. Lots of stuff that's small to guys is big stuff to girls.
You seem to have life all figured out.
HeyItsChelsea
03/16/10, 03:20 AM
You seem to have life all figured out.
Not really!/:
pretty certain its not a big deal. maybe if he had sung it to her i could see why you'd be pissed, but it seemed to be a nice thing he did for your friend.
spritelybrin
03/16/10, 02:03 PM
Tough love time.
Cry me a river. Get off the cross. Take the wood. Build a bridge. Get over it.
hahahah thats fuckin brilliant.....
but yea i can see why this girl is upset...but uhh if thats the biggest issue you guys have??! count yourself lucky lol
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