The Kiss Goodbye

[EmoPunkerGirl]

The light reflects of the moon as i sit and wait for you, it reminds me of the looks you used to shoot me. That would scare me to death, even if it was all I ever had to live for. The concrete is cold, just like the words that you said. It was all I could ever do to hope you never meant it. So just take it all back and maybe I will be able to forget . And I know I'll miss the things you'll never say to me, but before I break let me say that I won't go down without a fight......






It's not finished but...
Thought??

[Slaytus]

it didnt connect

[FScott]

I think it's okay, you will definetly get better the more you write.

[EmoPunkerGirl]

Thanks!!!

[a speedo model]

it isn't very good, but it show signs of promise. keep writing. it takes time.

[EmoPunkerGirl]

thanx!!!!

[wyverna]

I agree with everyone else; keep working on it. It's a little bland at the minute, but you definitely have potential.

[EmoPunkerGirl]

thanks:)

[OveriseFan]

You just cut and pasted cliches here and hoped for cohesiveness and wit. Well, regretably, that hardly ever works. It's the way I used to write, only, forgive me, slightly better and more clever. ;)

Keep writing, try to stay away from love in writing... for now anyway. Also, stay away from these cliches like "The looks you used to shoot me."

[EmoPunkerGirl]

kay thanx