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motionwm
09/07/06, 06:40 PM
So. I'm friends with this girl for about a year and a half now... About half a year ago I developed a very strong attraction for her, but didn't say anything because she had a boyfriend. Either way, we start talking alot online (our one year difference has us in different schools) and out of nowhere she comes up to me one day after school and hugs me like she was trying to kill me. I'm confused, but I look at her face and she's pretty upset and says she wants to talk to me.

So her boyfriend cheated on her, and I was the first person she told. I talked to her, told her I'd back her up with whatever she decided, but the advice I gave her was to confront her boyfriend. I had known him, and it seemed very uncharacteristic of him... I assumed it was a false rumor. Either way she does ask him, he cusses her out on the spot and says he's done with her.

I feel horrible. I feel like I destroyed their relationship, which is upsetting because she seemed so happy. About a month later, she asks me why I never date girls. The truth of the matter was that I just didn't feel about any girl the way I felt about her. I tell her that there's "a girl" that I haven't told. Her response is "what are the chances that girl is me?". I'm very reluctant to pursure a relationship considering how fragile our friendship would be, so I tell her it seems risky so soon after her last thing and that maybe we should just be friends.

She says she and some friends are going to the mall and wants me to come. One of them was my best friend (who I met the girl through) so I figure it'll be cool. Either way, we're at the mall and she's sending me all these signals that she wants to get close... For instance she's always talking and walking with me exclusively, touching me around the waiste and little things like that. We're sitting down later talking (the whole group) and we're all having a good time. For some reason she puts her head on my shoulder and tells me that she hasn't had this much fun with a guy in forever.

I cave.

I put my arm around her and ask her out. She seems really REALLY happy, says yes, and kisses me. So I'm ecstatic, she's happy, it's all good. This is the Saturday before school starts.

Three days into school she just wants to be friends. She acts like it was just a week-long thing... I guess she didn't realise how long I've liked her, but now she talks to me about guys she thinks are cute and it breaks my fucking heart. She still talks to me online ALOT, but when she's around this particular group of friends, I'm lucky to get a wave from her. It's like there's some kind of atmosphere around these girls she hangs with, where suddenly she can't even talk to me. I get the feeling she's embarassed or something, which is puzzling because I've never even MET these girls before!

Where it gets really interesting is that another girl asks me to swap mixed CD's with her, and starts wanting me to hang out with her at lunch and such. The first girl gets kind of upset... She says she's surprised at how fast I started hanging out with another girl (and we're really just friends) and asks me why I wasn't spending time with lots of girls before dating her.

I'm pretty angry, but at the same time, I still like her ALOT. I just can't be mad at her, but I continue talking to her online (where she treats me like a best friend) and I continue just to walk by her in the halls and such with nothing more than a nod.

I don't know what to think, do, or say...

Darren McLeod
09/07/06, 07:28 PM
you're in highschool and very young. girls' feelings sway faster than a flag blowing in the wind at that point in their lives. Maybe it's hormones. Either way, just try to get over it and aim somewhere else, otherwise you're going to feel uncomfortable and will be waiting for something to happen for a long time to come which own't be fun.

exesandohs
09/07/06, 07:33 PM
Ok dude well listen since I'm a girl maybe I can help?

there a guy I know who likes me, but I don't return the feelings I still want him as a friend so he's in your position. I talk to him about guys/girls etc, she wants you as a friend. If it's meant to be she'll see that you really like her. Have you told her your feelings? You don't know how far that can get you, granted they're is the possibly that she may turn around and say the dreaded words of 'i just want to be friends'.

Talk to her, and be open, and just give it time.

Good luck xx

B_0202
09/07/06, 09:26 PM
Have you told her your feelings? You don't know how far that can get you, granted they're is the possibly that she may turn around and say the dreaded words of 'i just want to be friends'.

Talk to her, and be open, and just give it time.

I agree
tell her exactly what you feel
the worst case senario is the one you are living right now as 'just friends'
seems like you don't have much to lose by opening up to her

Narcissm
09/08/06, 02:06 AM
the bottom line is she kind of played you really.....you were he rebound and what she did to you isnt fair. however its a lesson for the future guys and girls cant be friends...unless you have VERY srong will power!!!

xx

boysdontcry17
09/08/06, 06:05 AM
yes, darren is right, girls turn on a dime
dont too attached is my advice

Juliana101
09/08/06, 06:41 AM
If I were you, I would pursue a friends with benefits thing. You're 15 years old, you're going to forget about this girl in probably less than a year. If I were you, I'd prep for college. Convince her to give you a blowie.

motionwm
09/08/06, 04:08 PM
Yeah just thought I'd say I didn't type this.

Friends can be a pain sometimes. Mods can lock it if you want.

ForeverInADay
09/08/06, 04:33 PM
So her boyfriend cheated on her, and I was the first person she told. I talked to her, told her I'd back her up with whatever she decided, but the advice I gave her was to confront her boyfriend. I had known him, and it seemed very uncharacteristic of him... I assumed it was a false rumor. Either way she does ask him, he cusses her out on the spot and says he's done with her.
HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Anyways, that girl seems like a bitch. You told her that you'd feel like you were her rebound, and then pretty much convinced you that you weren't a rebound by giving you signals that she wanted to be with you for some time, and when you actually did cave and go out with her, she ended it a week later. Fuck that bitch.

Especially for getting mad at you when you're hanging out with that new girl. She's telling you what guys she thinks are cute, and you exchange a mix tape with another girl and she gets mad? Fuck her.

xowearmeout
09/08/06, 04:46 PM
girls suck.

xvszero
09/08/06, 05:45 PM
Well, straight up tell her you never, ever want to hear about guys from her. If she is halfway decent she will respect that.

I sort of got rejected by a girl a few weeks ago and she said she wants to still be friends and stuff and I said fine, under one condition... never, EVER come to me as a "guy friend" trying to talk about guys, because that would be completely disrespectful.

She agreed, we're still friends, and everything is fine.

Well, except that she rejected me. But whatever.

motionwm
09/08/06, 06:58 PM
Well, straight up tell her you never, ever want to hear about guys from her. If she is halfway decent she will respect that.

I sort of got rejected by a girl a few weeks ago and she said she wants to still be friends and stuff and I said fine, under one condition... never, EVER come to me as a "guy friend" trying to talk about guys, because that would be completely disrespectful.

She agreed, we're still friends, and everything is fine.

Well, except that she rejected me. But whatever.

haha that made me laugh...

but seriously, I didn't type that. lock it!!!

Squirrely Wrath
09/13/06, 06:01 AM
Dude she not worth your time.
Anyways you're 15 just chill.
Enjoy life before reality decides to wake you up =D

ndtitr
09/13/06, 11:12 AM
You Need To Get The Fuck Over Her. Girl # 1 That Is.

a speedo model
09/13/06, 03:52 PM
shit like this happens...