Inside a Harbor

[OveriseFan]

Pretty much written on the spot. First thing I've written in a while that I'm (somewhat) happy with though. Enjoy it.

"Inside a Harbor Where Our Thoughts Are Like Ships, Anchored Down With No Hope of Ever Being Set Free"

Let's all jump in the harbor,
And hit the water at the same time.
See if we can break the anchor lines
Tying down the ships
So the water will pour out,
And we'll be left with a useless dam.


Maybe if you can hold back
The froth swirling back and forth,
Between gaping holes,
You can stop, and listen, and grow.
But everytime they kiss it sounds like
White noise.
White noise.
Static snow falls with a peculiar grace,
And why is it that we have to find art in everything?
For once can't we say it like it really is:
A forged attempt at being something special,
Capsulizing feeling.

[a speedo model]

I really like this. It does feel a bit rough, like there's some polishing to be done. But it's very good and I LOVE how you end it. It really brings good closure. Loved it. As you know, I enjoy this type of imagery. :-)

[OveriseFan]

I really like this. It does feel a bit rough, like there's some polishing to be done. But it's very good and I LOVE how you end it. It really brings good closure. Loved it. As you know, I enjoy this type of imagery. :-)

Any ideas to polish it up?

[a speedo model]

Any ideas to polish it up?
The last two lines of the first stanza seem to bring it down. There's this build up and then it sort of ends. A bit underwhelming. And it feels like there should be something said between the two stanzas, they seem too disconnected to flow into each other. Or maybe if you edit the first they will then, I don't know. Just looking at it now, that's what I see.

I wouldn't change the last at all. I love it.

[OveriseFan]

Yeah, I kind of agree.

I thought the whole "Hold back" thing in the beginning of the second stanza connected with the useless dam though.

[a speedo model]

Yeah, I kind of agree.

I thought the whole "Hold back" thing in the beginning of the second stanza connected with the useless dam though.
Hmmm, I don't know. That's just what I felt when reading it.

[a speedo model]

Seriously, though. I think the last is some of your best work.

[OveriseFan]

Seriously, though. I think the last is some of your best work.

Thank you very much. I'll try to touch it up a little so it's more coherent.

[wyverna]

I like this, as usual, but I don't like:

So the water will pour out,
And we'll be left with a useless dam.

The 'useless dam' bit lets it down, it seems to spoil it.

I give useless criticism/comments, haha.

[black rose]

james i really like this.
like most people said, the last two lines on the first stanza need to be revised,
but overall this was very good.

i loved the ending. perfect.
also: this seems like it would be very good sung.
especailly the white noise part, i love that.

[OveriseFan]

james i really like this.
like most people said, the last two lines on the first stanza need to be revised,
but overall this was very good.

i loved the ending. perfect.
also: this seems like it would be very good sung.
especailly the white noise part, i love that.

White noise is one of the best lines I've ever written.

[black rose]

White noise is one of the best lines I've ever written.i absolutely love that part.
are you going to record this one?

[OveriseFan]

(pst... Tariq... Tariq! Read this...)

Oh Romeo, Romeo, blah blah blah Shakespearean, Where art thou?

[OveriseFan]

i absolutely love that part.
are you going to record this one?

:shrug: probably not.

At least, not in this form.

[punkpixie]

I love the second stanza.

the white noise bit is my favourite

[black rose]

:shrug: probably not.

At least, not in this form.:-(

[OveriseFan]

:-(

I'll probably use the White Noise line in a set of lyrics, but I don't know about the rest...

[thecurerocks182]

:shrug: probably not.

At least, not in this form.
How much of your stuff do you actually record and have recorded, and what do you use to record? Yes, I'm inquisitive.

[OveriseFan]

How much of your stuff do you actually record and have recorded, and what do you use to record? Yes, I'm inquisitive.

Less than I'd like.

A shitty headset mic and Audacity. :thumbup:

I'll post a song or two later this week, but I'm hoping to either use a friend's equipment or my school's sometime later this year to do an E.P.

[ArTkY_]

James sucks ass.

[thecurerocks182]

Less than I'd like.

A shitty headset mic and Audacity. :thumbup:

I'll post a song or two later this week, but I'm hoping to either use a friend's equipment or my school's sometime later this year to do an E.P.
Well, if you get a program like bittorent I could hook you up with a torrent that would allow you to obtain Cubase, which is an excellent recording program.

[OveriseFan]

Well, if you get a program like bittorent I could hook you up with a torrent that would allow you to obtain Cubase, which is an excellent recording program.

Yeah, definately.

I'm actually thinking of either getting an MBox or Firepod, to record stuff at my own home that sounds good. (MBox comes with protools, firepod comes with Cubase.)

Although, to be fair, while I appreciate the offer of the program(and will take you up on it probably.), the program alone doesn't have much affect on the kind of sound I get.(The bad soundcard and mic ruin it)

[OveriseFan]

James sucks ass.

So...

You like it?

[lostfear]

a failed attempt to capsulize a feeling is a lyric on the inside cover of Straylight Runs first full lenght album.

this reminded me of it.

I don't think it's the same deal.

just the same words.

I like it james, honestly I do.

[ArTkY_]

Laceyesque

[OveriseFan]

a failed attempt to capsulize a feeling is a lyric on the inside cover of Straylight Runs first full lenght album.

this reminded me of it.

I don't think it's the same deal.

just the same words.

I like it james, honestly I do.

That line was from one of the demos I think, mostly about the frustration John had with TBS(lyrically, constantly being disected, etc.)

This has nothing to do with that.

Good call on the same words though.

[OveriseFan]

Laceyesque

Lies.

[shoemile]

White noise is one of the best lines I've ever written.

"don't even speak to to all those sequin-surfed beach boys/when they kiss they spit white noise"

-The Hold Steady "First Night"

Good line either way, just been done before. Enjoyable as a whole.

[ArTkY_]

Lies.
Truths.

[OveriseFan]

"don't even speak to to all those sequin-surfed beach boys/when they kiss they spit white noise"

-The Hold Steady "First Night"

Good line either way, just been done before. Enjoyable as a whole.

gtfo.

For the record: That is a completely different line, even if they have the same verb and term in it. (Kiss and white noise, respectively.)

[a speedo model]

hahaha

[thecurerocks182]

Yeah, definately.

I'm actually thinking of either getting an MBox or Firepod, to record stuff at my own home that sounds good. (MBox comes with protools, firepod comes with Cubase.)

Although, to be fair, while I appreciate the offer of the program(and will take you up on it probably.), the program alone doesn't have much affect on the kind of sound I get.(The bad soundcard and mic ruin it)
It will allow you to do multi-tracking, which is very beneficial so that you can get a bigger sound out of your song; also you wouldn't have to do an entire song in one take. Obviously, it's not going to affect the quality of the recording, but I would rather produce a decent quality recording than something that would cost a lot of money. Soundcards are not very expensive either when compared to the price of a studio. In summation, it all depends on what you are willing to pay that will determine the quality of your recordings. Anyways, if your interested just PM me. I won't be sending it to you, just hooking you up with the links and guiding you though it...can't really do much more than that.

[OveriseFan]

It will allow you to do multi-tracking, which is very beneficial so that you can get a bigger sound out of your song; also you wouldn't have to do an entire song in one take. Obviously, it's not going to affect the quality of the recording, but I would rather produce a decent quality recording than something that would cost a lot of money. Soundcards are not very expensive either when compared to the price of a studio. In summation, it all depends on what you are willing to pay that will determine the quality of your recordings. Anyways, if your interested just PM me. I won't be sending it to you, just hooking you up with the links and guiding you though it...can't really do much more than that.

You can do multitracking in Audacity, too.

I don't know what stuff you listened to, or if I described something, but yeah. I mean, don't get me wrong. Cubase is a million times better than Audacity, but multi-tracking isn't the biggest thing. Cubase is just much more 'advanced' than Audacity.

How easy is it to edit it(I.E. Double the chorus to line it up perfectly to flow into the verse?)

[thecurerocks182]

You can do multitracking in Audacity, too.

I don't know what stuff you listened to, or if I described something, but yeah. I mean, don't get me wrong. Cubase is a million times better than Audacity, but multi-tracking isn't the biggest thing. Cubase is just much more 'advanced' than Audacity.

How easy is it to edit it(I.E. Double the chorus to line it up perfectly to flow into the verse?)
Well, I assumed you never had a program, so I apologize for my assumption. I don't know how good of a program Audacity, but I'm going to assume that it doesn't give you the opportunity to put effects on your recordings or create sounds like strings. Well, if your content with it than there is no reason to get Cubase, since it would probably take you forever to download.

[OveriseFan]

Well, I assumed you never had a program, so I apologize for my assumption. I don't know how good of a program Audacity, but I'm going to assume that it doesn't give you the opportunity to put effects on your recordings or create sounds like strings. Well, if your content with it than there is no reason to get Cubase, since it would probably take you forever to download.

No, I'm not content with it. I want Cubase, but I can't get a torrent...

Any other ideas?

[a speedo model]

Sorry to kind of jump in on this conversation but I'm curious about this Cubase, I've never heard of it. Is it worth downloading? I currently use Acid Pro 6 and it's proving to be a bitch with this EP. I'd like to check other programs out.

[thecurerocks182]

Here's the one I downloaded, http://torrents.to/search/212/Cubase.SX.v3.1.1.944-H2O.with.ED.SX3.Video.Tutorials-DELiRiUM.DVDr.UNOX.html .It's the same program I have, but I think I might have got it off of a different torrent site. Anyways, it is going to be a bitch to download (may take a few days to download depending on your connection), but it is a great program. As for Acid Pro 6, I pretty sure my friend has it and says its good. Are you new to it? I'm still trying to ask him how he hooks up his instruments directly to the computer to optimize recording quality.

[a speedo model]

Here's the one I downloaded, http://torrents.to/search/212/Cubase.SX.v3.1.1.944-H2O.with.ED.SX3.Video.Tutorials-DELiRiUM.DVDr.UNOX.html .It's the same program I have, but I think I might have got it off of a different torrent site. Anyways, it is going to be a bitch to download (may take a few days to download depending on your connection), but it is a great program. As for Acid Pro 6, I pretty sure my friend has it and says its good. Are you new to it? I'm still trying to ask him how he hooks up his instruments directly to the computer to optimize recording quality.
Thanks, I'll try using this and see.

I'm sort of new to it. I've had it for a little less then a year. And I know the basics from toying around with it. And to record guitar ,I basically plug a mic into the laptop and record my guitar through that. I know there's a better way. So I'd appreciate any advice/help you can offer.

[thecurerocks182]

ya, as of now I record using my microphone, but I'm hoping to get my friend to show me how to directly connect my guitar to the comp so that I can get a cleaner sound for lack of a better word. If your interested, you could send me something that you've been working on and I can give you an outside opinion on things like mixing. I'm not the greatest production wise, but I do have a keen sense for things being on time and my composition skills are pretty good I think. Have you been adding other instruments? And what has been difficult? Yes, I'm very bored at the moment.

[thecurerocks182]

Thanks, I'll try using this and see.

I'm sort of new to it. I've had it for a little less then a year. And I know the basics from toying around with it. And to record guitar ,I basically plug a mic into the laptop and record my guitar through that. I know there's a better way. So I'd appreciate any advice/help you can offer.
Sorry, I forget to inform that you will need a particular program in order to open image files or you could burn it onto a DVD (an image file is usually the result of ripping a DVD).

[a speedo model]

ya, as of now I record using my microphone, but I'm hoping to get my friend to show me how to directly connect my guitar to the comp so that I can get a cleaner sound for lack of a better word. If your interested, you could send me something that you've been working on and I can give you an outside opinion on things like mixing. I'm not the greatest production wise, but I do have a keen sense for things being on time and my composition skills are pretty good I think. Have you been adding other instruments? And what has been difficult? Yes, I'm very bored at the moment.
I'm mostly using acoustic so I don't think there's an easier way but using a mic works so I manage.

Actually, mixing is my favorite part. I love editing volumes, panning and whatnot. One of my favorite parts of the process.

I am. I'm adding both loops and MIDI tracks of piano, bells and some other tid bits. I've also been using FL Studio to make drum loops and then I insert them into Acid for some tracks.

There are actually a few songs that I have mixed feelings about. When I get some more solid demos I might take you up on you're offer.

[a speedo model]

Sorry, I forget to inform that you will need a particular program in order to open image files or you could burn it onto a DVD (an image file is usually the result of ripping a DVD).
Hmm, what program will I need?

[a speedo model]

If you're bored, read my new song. :-)

[thecurerocks182]

If you're bored, read my new song. :-)
lol...I did, I just didn't get around to commenting. My opinion on it is that the last few that you've posted were a lot better, but this one was good too. As for the program, I got one that is called DAEMON. It recognizes the file as a drive, and you are able to access it that way.

Hook me up with an mp3 anytime, I love to give people listens and give suggestions. I use to do it a lot in the promotion thread, but no one ever replies back.

[a speedo model]

lol...I did, I just didn't get around to commenting. My opinion on it is that the last few that you've posted were a lot better, but this one was good too. As for the program, I got one that is called DAEMON. It recognizes the file as a drive, and you are able to access it that way.

Hook me up with an mp3 anytime, I love to give people listens and give suggestions. I use to do it a lot in the promotion thread, but no one ever replies back.
Thanks. hmm, I'll try when it's done. Haha, which will be in a while.

I will, I'm really hoping to finish this..SOON. Haha, I just really want to get it done. But not rush it. Work stalled it for a few weeks which pissed me off.

[thecurerocks182]

Same with me, I got like 4 songs I'm working on that I'm eager to get people to listen, but the prpblem is I won't record unless no one is home.

[a speedo model]

Same with me, I got like 4 songs I'm working on that I'm eager to get people to listen, but the prpblem is I won't record unless no one is home.
Yeah, I cannot record vocals unless the house is empty.

[thecurerocks182]

so, you've never posted any of your songs. What do you sound like? I'm very intrigued by what you and overisefan sound like.

[a speedo model]

Acoustic guitar, a little electronic influences, I try to make it sound more like a band then just a guy with a guitar if you know what I mean.

My voice is pretty bad, though.

[OveriseFan]

Same with me, I got like 4 songs I'm working on that I'm eager to get people to listen, but the prpblem is I won't record unless no one is home.

Same with me. hahaha.

[OveriseFan]

so, you've never posted any of your songs. What do you sound like? I'm very intrigued by what you and overisefan sound like.

I sound like a cow, a dog, and a frog thrown into a blender JUST AS I turn the blender on.

It's fun.

[thecurerocks182]

Acoustic guitar, a little electronic influences, I try to make it sound more like a band then just a guy with a guitar if you know what I mean.

My voice is pretty bad, though.
my voice is terrible, but if you ever checked out one songs you would know that. I just hope that people focus on my composition skills rather than my ability to sing.
I sound like a cow, a dog, and a frog thrown into a blender JUST AS I turn the blender on.

It's fun.
It sounds like fun, but what about the music?

[ArTkY_]

It sounds like fun, but what about the music?
He's actually a pretty decent singer, but he's only an average guitarist.

[thecurerocks182]

He's actually a pretty decent singer, but he's only an average guitarist.
When are you going to post something? I think I remember you saying you were in the midst of recording.

[ArTkY_]

When are you going to post something? I think I remember you saying you were in the midst of recording.
I'm still writing, d00d. I can't record until I get a better mic.

[a speedo model]

He's actually a pretty decent singer, but he's only an average guitarist.
And he's a so so lover.

[lightcollapse]

But everytime they kiss it sounds like
White noise.
White noise.
Static snow falls with a peculiar grace,


brother, you possess skills.

[ArTkY_]

I still think its Laceyesque.

And you still suck ass.