This Feels Like More than Just a Grain of Sand

[lew_1987]

I literally just finished these. i started them the other day but just went through and edited them slightly, and made up the title and added that to second "chorus" bit. these lyrics are very personal to me and are about the loss of a friend. thanks for reading.

When you thrust your tiny hands around me;
It felt like true friendship.
I thought for so long it would be endless.
But this is that moment in time -
Of realisation. (I’ll never be the same)

I feel so unrelated;
I’m distant now.
Our lives don’t coincide
What once used to entwine so intricately
Is now worlds apart.

I’m left hearing stories second hand
Stories of your mischief
People seem to mistake me for you;
Makes me feel so unimportant…
I will never be you.

When you thrust your tiny hands around me;
It felt like true kinship.
I thought for so long it would be endless.
But this is that moment in time -
Of realisation.
This feels like more than just a grain of sand

The crowds do gather
Impostors will surely fade

Our blue handprints still hang on the wall,
As if we never changed -
Nostalgia is futile.
What you’ve done renders memories void.

The crowds do gather
Impostors will surely fade
FADE!!!

[CellarGhosts]

Good job. Sorry about your loss. Due to the subject matter/inspiration (loss of a friend), this reminded me of Lagwagon's album "Resolve" (if you haven't heard it, the whole album is about/to/inspired by the band's former drummer/long-time friend, Derrick Plourde, who committed suicide). So nice work, my man. Keep it up :) By the way, is this a song, or poem? (in other words, do you have music for it? if not, i could picture this working really well as a song)

[a speedo model]

I enjoyed this.

[lew_1987]

Good job. Sorry about your loss. Due to the subject matter/inspiration (loss of a friend), this reminded me of Lagwagon's album "Resolve" (if you haven't heard it, the whole album is about/to/inspired by the band's former drummer/long-time friend, Derrick Plourde, who committed suicide). So nice work, my man. Keep it up :) By the way, is this a song, or poem? (in other words, do you have music for it? if not, i could picture this working really well as a song)

thanks. i ripped that cd off my brother although i haven't heard it yet. i think i will tonight. it might be very suitable considering the subject matter :-) i quite like lagwagon aswell, i don't know why i haven't listened to it yet. everything i have posted on here are song lyrics, i have only wrote one or two poems, i might actually post one of them in a few days seeing as you ask! i don't have music as of yet I have tons of sets of lyrics that don't fit my songs and loads of songs that don't fit my lyrics, lol. but i am starting to get ideas in my head for the music, especially the chorus, so i might see if i can come up with anything later. what bits did you like the best? i like the title, i kind of came up with it by accident when i was trying to think of a temporary title to post this as. thanks again

PS. My friend hasn't died, sorry if it came across that way. I don't want to get into details but I have seen them for the person they are because of a few things they have done recently, one thing in particular.

[lew_1987]

I enjoyed this.

thank you. anything in particular u liked/didn't like?

[a speedo model]

thank you. anything in particular u liked/didn't like?
There were a few words I usually don't like for some apparent reason, like kinship. I'm not sure why they just don't seem to get a significant reaction from me. But it's just me.

[CellarGhosts]

thanks. i ripped that cd off my brother although i haven't heard it yet. i think i will tonight. it might be very suitable considering the subject matter :-) i quite like lagwagon aswell, i don't know why i haven't listened to it yet. everything i have posted on here are song lyrics, i have only wrote one or two poems, i might actually post one of them in a few days seeing as you ask! i don't have music as of yet I have tons of sets of lyrics that don't fit my songs and loads of songs that don't fit my lyrics, lol. but i am starting to get ideas in my head for the music, especially the chorus, so i might see if i can come up with anything later. what bits did you like the best? i like the title, i kind of came up with it by accident when i was trying to think of a temporary title to post this as. thanks again

PS. My friend hasn't died, sorry if it came across that way. I don't want to get into details but I have seen them for the person they are because of a few things they have done recently, one thing in particular.
Sure thing man. Yes, Resolve is a great album. Alot of hardcore Lagwagon fans are kinda "meh" about it because it's so dark and somber, unlike their previous CDs. It's really good. The hidden track is amazing, one of the most haunting/heartbreaking songs I've ever heard.
As far as the parts that I liked best, I'd say:

Our blue handprints still hang on the wall,
As if we never changed -
Nostalgia is futile.
What you’ve done renders memories void.

The crowds do gather
Impostors will surely fade
FADE!!!

those parts there I really liked the most. Something about them, it's just real cool.

And sorry I mistook this for a piece about death haha. I guess I did so, because recently, within two months, like, 3 or 4 kids at Shelbyville High School (which is near mine) died in auto accidents, and though I didn't know them, many of my friends did, so I guess reading this being about a "loss of a friend" instantly made me think that way. So sorry again haha, but good job. And still, though, sorry about whatever happened with your friend.
PS -I'd totally appreciate it if you checked out my new one, not too far down from this post.

[lew_1987]

Sure thing man. Yes, Resolve is a great album. Alot of hardcore Lagwagon fans are kinda "meh" about it because it's so dark and somber, unlike their previous CDs. It's really good. The hidden track is amazing, one of the most haunting/heartbreaking songs I've ever heard.
As far as the parts that I liked best, I'd say:

Our blue handprints still hang on the wall,
As if we never changed -
Nostalgia is futile.
What you’ve done renders memories void.

The crowds do gather
Impostors will surely fade
FADE!!!

those parts there I really liked the most. Something about them, it's just real cool.

And sorry I mistook this for a piece about death haha. I guess I did so, because recently, within two months, like, 3 or 4 kids at Shelbyville High School (which is near mine) died in auto accidents, and though I didn't know them, many of my friends did, so I guess reading this being about a "loss of a friend" instantly made me think that way. So sorry again haha, but good job. And still, though, sorry about whatever happened with your friend.
PS -I'd totally appreciate it if you checked out my new one, not too far down from this post.

i just did that, before i read this reply ;-) erm, thanks for the feedback. i'll listen to that hidden track now.

ps don't worry i realised it was quite an easy mistake to make hehe. stuff like that happened while i was in high school, even though i knew none of them it still really effected me. two kids died a few years ago after the IRA planted a bomb in my town centre. one of them went to my school.

[CellarGhosts]

i just did that, before i read this reply ;-) erm, thanks for the feedback. i'll listen to that hidden track now.

ps don't worry i realised it was quite an easy mistake to make hehe. stuff like that happened while i was in high school, even though i knew none of them it still really effected me. two kids died a few years ago after the IRA planted a bomb in my town centre. one of them went to my school.
Haha, thanks again for checking it out, too

And yeah, i read this over again, and realized sort of where you were coming from. I guess this could function either way, as in, if you recorded it, and people listened to it, and all they knew it was about was, as you said, the "loss of a friend" I'm sure quite a few would interpret it the way I did.

And yeah, that's real sad about all that violence going on with the IRA and so forth. I saw on an episode of Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations, when he was in Ireland, them talk about the IRA and all of that stuff. Before that, I had no idea it was like that in Ireland. Call me ignorant haha, but it just always looked really serene over there. I guess it is, just not in that part...

[lew_1987]

There were a few words I usually don't like for some apparent reason, like kinship. I'm not sure why they just don't seem to get a significant reaction from me. But it's just me.

yeah, i get what you mean. i'm like that with some words. i was a little unsure about it when i wrote it, i hate the idea of repeating choruses though lol. however i did want to get across that me and this person (well i thought) understood eachother, aswell as getting across that we were good friends.

on a side note, how annoying is that good charlotte advert?

[lew_1987]

Haha, thanks again for checking it out, too

And yeah, i read this over again, and realized sort of where you were coming from. I guess this could function either way, as in, if you recorded it, and people listened to it, and all they knew it was about was, as you said, the "loss of a friend" I'm sure quite a few would interpret it the way I did.

And yeah, that's real sad about all that violence going on with the IRA and so forth. I saw on an episode of Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations, when he was in Ireland, them talk about the IRA and all of that stuff. Before that, I had no idea it was like that in Ireland. Call me ignorant haha, but it just always looked really serene over there. I guess it is, just not in that part...

well the wierd thing is, i don't even live in ireland, i live in england. and my town is fairly big but its not exactly a city or anything. they planted bombs in the bins in the town centre, because theyre made of metal. one of the kids was about 5 i think, and only went into town to buy a gift for his mum on mothers day... he had literally just bought it and then walked out the shop which was right next to this metal bin... and you can guess the rest. also there is some kind of gas storage on the outskirts... a gas plant or whatever and they tried to blow up that aswell. bastards

[a speedo model]

yeah, i get what you mean. i'm like that with some words. i was a little unsure about it when i wrote it, i hate the idea of repeating choruses though lol. however i did want to get across that me and this person (well i thought) understood eachother, aswell as getting across that we were good friends.

on a side note, how annoying is that good charlotte advert?
Yeah, the word fits and is right for the context. I'm just weird about it, haha.

Is it a pop-up, because I've got them blocked. I hate how they pop up when you log on.

[lew_1987]

Yeah, the word fits and is right for the context. I'm just weird about it, haha.

Is it a pop-up, because I've got them blocked. I hate how they pop up when you log on.

nah its just at the top of the screen. it says rollover to play a clip. i freaked out before because i didnt rollover it and it just started playing. seeing as i only had a few AP windows open, i wonder where the hell it was coming from. took me ages to figure out!

[a speedo model]

nah its just at the top of the screen. it says rollover to play a clip. i freaked out before because i didnt rollover it and it just started playing. seeing as i only had a few AP windows open, i wonder where the hell it was coming from. took me ages to figure out!
Ohh, yeah, I have not listened. When the album leaks I'll download it, listen and laugh, then delete it.

[CellarGhosts]

well the wierd thing is, i don't even live in ireland, i live in england. and my town is fairly big but its not exactly a city or anything. they planted bombs in the bins in the town centre, because theyre made of metal. one of the kids was about 5 i think, and only went into town to buy a gift for his mum on mothers day... he had literally just bought it and then walked out the shop which was right next to this metal bin... and you can guess the rest. also there is some kind of gas storage on the outskirts... a gas plant or whatever and they tried to blow up that aswell. bastards
Wow, man. that's no good at all. really sad to hear about all that.
Ohh, yeah, I have not listened. When the album leaks I'll download it, listen and laugh, then delete it.
hahahaha

[as_we_learn]

damn good job man. i especially liked this part:

Our blue handprints still hang on the wall,
As if we never changed -
Nostalgia is futile.
What you’ve done renders memories void.

Good job man

[lew_1987]

damn good job man. i especially liked this part:

Our blue handprints still hang on the wall,
As if we never changed -
Nostalgia is futile.
What you’ve done renders memories void.

Good job man

thanks. i really appreciate people commenting on this, i'm honoured to get such good feedback!!!

[lew_1987]

for those interested, i started working on the music for this song. i did intend it to be a full band song, but i was thinking about the situation more whilst watching tv and i thought i'd pick up my guitar and play. this is what came out... its a lot different to what i normally write. and i thought seeing as i was thinking about this just before i wrote it, why not use the lyrics for this song. so... here's an mp3 of what ive got so far:

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EXYTWIOL (http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EXYTWIOL)

sorry its a bit abrupt thats all ive got so far really. note: i recorded it off guitar pro 5. if you check it out, i appreciate it. please comment

[thecurerocks182]

for those interested, i started working on the music for this song. i did intend it to be a full band song, but i was thinking about the situation more whilst watching tv and i thought i'd pick up my guitar and play. this is what came out... its a lot different to what i normally write. and i thought seeing as i was thinking about this just before i wrote it, why not use the lyrics for this song. so... here's an mp3 of what ive got so far:

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EXYTWIOL (http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EXYTWIOL)

sorry its a bit abrupt thats all ive got so far really. note: i recorded it off guitar pro 5. if you check it out, i appreciate it. please comment
I listened and enjoyed it for the most part. It seems to fit well with the lyrics. I anticipate the actual recording of it when it is done...curious to hear how you'd sing the lyrics to that. The panning in it is really annoying though...

Also, when I first read the lyrics I too thought that it was referring to a dead person. Anyways, hope everything gets better since the person isn't really dead.

PS - I self promote all the time as it is the only means to get users to really read into the works.

[lew_1987]

I listened and enjoyed it for the most part. It seems to fit well with the lyrics. I anticipate the actual recording of it when it is done...curious to hear how you'd sing the lyrics to that. The panning in it is really annoying though...

Also, when I first read the lyrics I too thought that it was referring to a dead person. Anyways, hope everything gets better since the person isn't really dead.

PS - I self promote all the time as it is the only means to get users to really read into the works.

yeah thats true. thank you. well, i wouldn't sing, because i'm not great! haha. well i might try over easter, but probably not because of commitments (girlfriend, band practise, university assignments etc.). why is the panning annoying? thats just standard practise for me cause i like to differentiate between the two guitars. if you don't like it fair enough, sorry its annoying, lol.

[thecurerocks182]

I can relate to that, but I feel it is better to release as a whole then as incomplete so that the listener can experience a finished product. I don't record because I'm afraid people might hear me, so you are better off than I am.

I guess I should have went more indepth with the panning, which is to say that it was more to due with the beginning than anything. Excise the random keyboard part and make the beginning guitar pan centered, then when second guitar comes in leave it as you had it. I think that would make for a more pleasant listen...but that is my opinion anyways.

[lew_1987]

I can relate to that, but I feel it is better to release as a whole then as incomplete so that the listener can experience a finished product. I don't record because I'm afraid people might hear me, so you are better off than I am.

I guess I should have went more indepth with the panning, which is to say that it was more to due with the beginning than anything. Excise the random keyboard part and make the beginning guitar pan centered, then when second guitar comes in leave it as you had it. I think that would make for a more pleasant listen...but that is my opinion anyways.

ah, i see what you mean now! yeah i agree, i usually just leave it simple on guitar pro, i probably would have had the intro centered if i recorded it. i see what you mean, i think i will try and record vocals for some of my full demos in summer. i just wanted to give people a taster of some of my stuff. although this is a lot different from what i usually write. thanks for the feedback