ok so i need some love advice

[luvly]

i dated a guy for 5 years ..we were engaged and then split. it took about 5 years to get over him..when i was finally ready to let go of him i met someone..i thought it was great..he talked about movng in and marriage and he said the L word! i was in awe and so happy that finally i loved someone else --i have moved on..well what i did not know was that he was on the rebound. all his feelings were probably not real at all...we broke up after only three months.. it hurt , i cried and now i met someone again after 4 months after the break up...we dated only 1 week and i got strong feeelings for him and when he did not call for one night i freaked out! this is definitlly not normal..am i on the rebound now? i feel like i am so screwed up... am i projecting my feelings on him from the last relationship i was just in.. ? i wonder if there is true love and happiness out there..my faith in marriage and love ever after is not there anymore....

[llwilliamsll]

maybe you should just take some time off from dating...you seem to be confiding in anyone to feel loved
how old are you? curious, since you mention marriage a lot

[Tyler Revolution]

i dated a guy for 5 years ..we were engaged and then split. it took about 5 years to get over him..when i was finally ready to let go of him i met someone..i thought it was great..he talked about movng in and marriage and he said the L word! i was in awe and so happy that finally i loved someone else --i have moved on..well what i did not know was that he was on the rebound. all his feelings were probably not real at all...we broke up after only three months.. it hurt , i cried and now i met someone again after 4 months after the break up...we dated only 1 week and i got strong feeelings for him and when he did not call for one night i freaked out! this is definitlly not normal..am i on the rebound now? i feel like i am so screwed up... am i projecting my feelings on him from the last relationship i was just in.. ? i wonder if there is true love and happiness out there..my faith in marriage and love ever after is not there anymore....

Sounds like you need to slow things down a bit. You talked about moving in together, love, and marriage with the second guy after 3 months? Actually, you broke up after 3 months, so you talked about these things even sooner. Like the kid above me said, you need to take some time off from dating, or being in serious relationships. It sounds like you're not a very independent person and rely on your partners to keep you emontionally stable. I would say take some time off, go out and do some casual dating, and take things much slower. Talking about love and moving in together doesn't require a certain length of dating time, but it's more than 2 months, to me anyways. Get to know the guy(s) you date in more depth, and I'm sure you'll be alright.

[luvly]

Thanks for the advice. i appreciate it..i am 34 years old. the funny thing is that its so hard for me to find a connection with anyone..so when i do find it ..chemistry and all that well its surprising..so its not like i date guys and fall in love all the time..its so rare to find that connection so when i have its like great!!\ finally! i also thought he was rushing into things when he was talking about marriage!! i actually told him that he needed to sort out his feelings from his past relationships before we move forward..but guys are great with words! i am very independant and happy when i am single but i gues s you are right..i get freaked out when in a relationship and something does nto go right..thats the co-dependant in me. i am working on that as we all know no one is perfect..i know the 5 year relationship did its emotional damge..
a week is nothing to freak about!!! i realized i am not ready for any relatioship at this time!!

[Tyler Revolution]

At least you can understand and see that you're not ready. Like I said before, just casually date around, take things slow, and I'm sure you'll find him.

[Dix_Punk]

the only advice i can give you is this: be alone for some time, think things for a while, you sound like a sweet girl, there's no need for rush things up. You'll find out someone

[theguilt engine]

Contrary to what these other's have said, it's not a BAD thing that every man you've met is someone you can see yourself with. Though you may not necessarily know everything about them, or how it will end up...if you have a strong attraction to someone on different levels then you have to take it! It's hard to know...it just is, and when it's completely right you'll know. Moreover, don't keep yourself from dating and I think that when you are dating casually..."rebound" happens often but not always. Hope this helps.

[luvly]

yes that does hlelp, thank you. I guess dating makes perfect and not everyone will be the right fit and just keep moving forward until you find the perfect fit...if there is such a thing called perfect but yes definitely i am learning to not give up.. feeling much better than yesterday and each day will get even better..