My First Original Piece..please Read!!!

[Poor Excuse]

i took her out
it was a friday night
i wore cologne
to get the feeling right
we started making
then she took of my pants
but then i turned on the tv

{chorus}
and thats about the time she walked away from me
nobody likes u when ur 23
and ur still more amused by tv shows
what the hell is add
my friends say i should act my age
whats my age again
whats my age again

and later on
on the drive home
i called her mom
from pay phone
i said i was the cops and ur husbands in jail
this state looks down on sodomy

{chorus}
and thats about the time she walked away from me
nobody likes u when ur 23
and ur still more amused by prank phone calls
what the hell is call id
my friends say i should act my age
whats my age again
whats my age again

{interlude}

{chorus}
and thats about the time she walked away from me
nobody likes u when ur 23
and u still act like ur in freshman year
what the hell is wrong with me
my friends say i should act my age
whats my age again
whats my age again
and thats about the time that she broke up with me
no one should take themselves so seriously
with many years ahead to fall in love
why would u wish down on me
whats my age again
whats my age again

whats my age again...

[Garistotle]

Um... how original :rolleyes:

*Garistotle would like to point out the obvious sarcasm in that statement... that's what the rolling of eyes was for.*

[ifuckinhateyou]

All the small things
True care truth brings
I'll take one lift
You're ride best trip

Always I know
You'll be at my show
Watching, waiting
Commiserating


Say it ain't so
I will not go
Turn the lights off
Carry me home
Na na na....


Late night
Come home
Work sucks
I know


She left me roses by the stairs
Surprises let me know she cares


Say it ain't so
I will not go
Turn the lights off
Carry me home
Na na na....


Say it ain't so
I will not go
Turn the lights off
Carry me home


Keep your head still
I'll be your thrill
The night will go on
My little windmill


Say it ain't so
I will not go
Turn the lights off
Carry me home


Keep your head still
I'll be your thrill
The night will go on
The night will go on
My little windmill


WOW. I'M SUCH A MUSICAL GENIUS.

[Kayde]

Originally posted by Garistotle
Um... how original :rolleyes:

*Garistotle would like to point out the obvious sarcasm in that statement... that's what the rolling of eyes was for.*

LOL

[Rufio217]

If your going to TRY and be funny in the sarcastic sense of criticizing a band that changed peoples attention on music, then make damn sure you know the song, b/c you royally fucked that up...just some food for thought well your sitting home on your ass mocking bands who are out there putting there life into their work

[NoseBleed]

:rolleyes: Hmm... Your original piece sounds awfully familiar, swear I've heard it before.... na it must just be so good I hear it playing on the radio and music channels already... but it does sound familiar .... or maybe it's just me... hmm... I wonder why I get this feeling as I read the lyrics

lol if this is an original piece of yours elvis is alive and kicking it back in graceland

Hey I even have a tune already for those lyrics of yours....