relationships (could use a quick opinion please!)

[xXaLLiOo]

I just read this on a girls myspace....i thought it was really interesting...


Quote:
you wont be his first, his last or his only
he's loved before, he will love again but if
he loves you now what else matters?
he's not perfect, and neither are you
and the two of you will never be perfect
but if he makes you laugh, at least once
causes you to think twice, and admits
to being human, and making mistakes...
hold on to him and give him all you've got
he is not going to quote poetry, he is not going to be
thinking about you every moment, but he will give you
a part of him, that he knows you can break
don't hurt him, don't change him, dont expect
too much from him, smile when he makes you happy
cry when he makes you sad and
miss him when he's not there


is that really what a relationship is supposed to look like? i cant pull out any part of that that sounds wrong which makes me think that it must be right...but reading it as a whole makes me sick to my stomach if thats really all a relationship should be...i would love to hear your opinions on that to either give me a reality check that i apparantly desparately needed, or justify my opinion that a relationship should be so much more than that....i'm really scared now that my expectations for a relationship are way too high if that really is the standard...

[doomcrs04]

Personal Life.

[iLikePants]

Sounds like a shitty relationship.

[swirlofhues]

no, fuck that. every guy should be pussy whipped and afraid to talk up.

[Of Dust and Nations]

your (and really, anyone's) standards for a relationship should simply be to have one with someone you want to be with, someone who you enjoy their company, and someone that respects you. you can't go into a relationship thinking you're going to be with them forever, and you can't expect the other person to be prince charming. nobody is that perfect and things just aren't that easy.

you're only 17 years old, and really a relationship (or even the prospect of one) shouldn't worry you or bother you much right now. that's not to say you shouldn't begin a relationship or pursue one, but just don't expect too much. when you click with someone, you'll click.

[xvszero]

Sounds like high school.

Because in reality, many adults do find someone they stay with forever.

Well. Except nowadays the divorce rate is growing and growing...

[Rock]

Sounds like high school.

Definitely sounds like high school. The only thing I like about it is that at least the high schooler that wrote it was realistic about what to expect from relationships. We all have ideas in our minds of what a relationship should be like, and more often than not, we expect too much. As everyone does or should know, a relationship is a balance between giving and taking. You can't have it all.

Because in reality, many adults do find someone they stay with forever.No.

Well. Except nowadays the divorce rate is growing and growing...Yes. Unreasonable expectations of marriage are probably one of the bigger reasons why most marriages don't succeed.

[xjustinx]

omg i ned to ad her

[xvszero]

Definitely sounds like high school. The only thing I like about it is that at least the high schooler that wrote it was realistic about what to expect from relationships. We all have ideas in our minds of what a relationship should be like, and more often than not, we expect too much. As everyone does or should know, a relationship is a balance between giving and taking. You can't have it all.

No.

Yes. Unreasonable expectations of marriage are probably one of the bigger reasons why most marriages don't succeed.

And yet many adults still make it. Both my pairs of grandparents ended in death did they part, and my parents probably will as well.

I'm not saying the odds are particularly good nowadays, but I AM saying that at a certain point you don't have to assume a relationship will end and the person will move on to love someone else. Many people will actually make a real commitment and stick to it.

Just not in high school.

[brentkid]

I just read this on a girls myspace....i thought it was really interesting...


Quote:
you wont be his first, his last or his only
he's loved before, he will love again but if
he loves you now what else matters?
he's not perfect, and neither are you
and the two of you will never be perfect
but if he makes you laugh, at least once
causes you to think twice, and admits
to being human, and making mistakes...
hold on to him and give him all you've got
he is not going to quote poetry, he is not going to be
thinking about you every moment, but he will give you
a part of him, that he knows you can break
don't hurt him, don't change him, dont expect
too much from him, smile when he makes you happy
cry when he makes you sad and
miss him when he's not there


is that really what a relationship is supposed to look like? i cant pull out any part of that that sounds wrong which makes me think that it must be right...but reading it as a whole makes me sick to my stomach if thats really all a relationship should be...i would love to hear your opinions on that to either give me a reality check that i apparantly desparately needed, or justify my opinion that a relationship should be so much more than that....i'm really scared now that my expectations for a relationship are way too high if that really is the standard...
Of course you go into relationships with reservations. I've been with my girlfriend for three years coming in October, and I sure as hell didn't go into the relationship saying, "Yeah, we'll stay together forever."

That describes how a person might go into a relationship, but that's not how it's supposed to stay during the entirety of it.

[Rock]

And yet many adults still make it. Both my pairs of grandparents ended in death did they part, and my parents probably will as well.

I'm not saying the odds are particularly good nowadays, but I AM saying that at a certain point you don't have to assume a relationship will end and the person will move on to love someone else. Many people will actually make a real commitment and stick to it.

Just not in high school.
Of course they do. People make misguided decisions every day. Your grandparents marriage ending in death do them part is an anomaly today, and is more appropriate to people of their generation. Divorce has become increasingly acceptable, and is an easy way out of the difficulties faced by most married couples at some point during their marriage. Don't get me wrong though, there are times when divorce is acceptable. Honestly, there is no point where you can assume a relationship won't end. My parents just got divorced after a marriage of 28 years where to all outward appearances, they were a happily married couple. Everyone I know, including my own family members, were shocked.

[xvszero]

Hmm, of course there are no securities, but I'm lust railing against that poem and how it states he WILL love again. Like as if you have to approach every relationship as if it will definitely end before death. That's just silly to me.

Then again it works perfectly for high school kids.

[xXaLLiOo]

but that sounds more like a friendship to me than a relationship even in high school
i know youre not supposed to go into a relationship expecting it to last forever but is it wrong to go into a relationship hoping/expecting to fall in love? is that to high of an expectation? if youre just looking for someone to have fun with who makes you smile sometimes and admits to being human than what makes that person any different than just a friend? (besides the making out and all that)

[myantiyou]

Don't trust anything MySpaces give you. You can't really say a relationship is "supposed" to look like that, it's just a hopeless-romantic passage.

[xXaLLiOo]

but thats not even hopeless romantic its like anti-hopeless romantic...its more like "relationships shouldnt mean anything as long as youre having fun"

[xvszero]

Yeah.

I think it was written by someone who got burned a few times too many and wanted to try to make it all seem good in retrospect.

[xXaLLiOo]

but im not crazy in thinking that relationships should be deeper than that? even if youre expecting to marry the person it should still be deeper than that?

[xvszero]

Well, what do you mean by deeper?

It does sound pretty vapid, but I'm not sure the author (if you can use that word here) necessarily intended it to come off as that shallow.

Chances are she? just sucks hard at writing poetry.

[myantiyou]

but thats not even hopeless romantic its like anti-hopeless romantic...its more like "relationships shouldnt mean anything as long as youre having fun"

If thats really what it means, thats totally wrong. Relationships aren't all about fun. Maybe in your youth they could be, but you have to consider both sides. If you get with someone who really likes you, you can't just brush him off as if he's nothing and just someone to screw around with.

[Agent Crayon]

I hate teenage poetry.