Just looking for some feedback.

[slayeralice]

hey, i'm pretty new here and i was just looking for someplace that people would tell me what they honestly thought of some of my lines. If you could tell me what you hate or like about them it would be a big help. thanks. These are just some random lyrics from some songs i have written.

Sex appeal by any other name might make your ears bleed.
This is just another evolution, from bad to worse to someone save us all.
i'm not looking for happy anymore, just a little better off.
And i've got more defenses then i've got problems.
i'm flicking ashes into your drink because i'm just that petty.
i dont call this better, just behind bars.
catch the kids going off cliffs.
come jump in puddles with me, its a test of true love.
i pull my words from crossroads and crosswords.
sacrificail lambs, wheres the slaughter at?
Bad-ass with a night light baby.
lines dont mean a thing if you catn see them, we're crossing crossing everything in sight.
be carefull hun, i use this pen like a gun.
girls with criss-cross arms are the ones you should watch out for, cause baby we like it when it hurts
i've stopped making sense a long time ago, now its just whatever sounds good.
i'm going at 100 witty comments per hour.

[ArTkY_]

Post an actual song, random lines can only be judged in context.

[anamericangod]

wut

[lostfear]

yeah, I agree with the above.

some have potential. Take the ones that sound similar and put them into song form. then you might have something.

[kait.]

catch the kids going off cliffs
catcher in the rye?

but tariq is right; lines need to be judged in context. one good line does not a song make. if you have a piece of something and want feedback on it as you build around it, you can always post that in the discussion thread.

[lew_1987]

i don't really like any of these, they seem awfully contrived to me.

[nbaontcty]

i use this pen like a gun

thats similar to "My pen is the barrel of my gun, remind me which side you should be on" fall out boy

i dont get the song at all.

one bit.

what is it suposted to mean.

like you just throw lines in.

i kinda do that but i mean like i just dont get it.

keep working on it.
practice makes perfect.