tectactoe
10/25/07, 10:56 PM
Here's some of the stuff I wrote. I have lots more, but I figure I'll only post a few at a time. I really don't think it's great and I don't expect you to like it, but I really want some criticism and some comments. Likes, dislikes, certain lines/parts you liked the most/least, etc. And serious ones. Not like "omg sux", you know. Enjoy and thank you.
--------------------------------------
Arson on the West Coast
--------------------------------------
Well we once set this ship on fire / just sow e could see it burn
And we were watching from a distance / as the rudder over turned,
People screaming, people sinking / people praying to their God
While the waves swept clean the deck / just like a brand new parking lot.
The mast, it cracked; the hull collapsed / such as a fragile house of cards
As people's hands broke through the surface / in a sea of sprinkled shards.
Reaching out for a higher hope / all of which had just then been erased
When in a flame of bitter taste / the ship and crew were laid to waste.
If you were the captain
Well what would you do?
Would you break from the ship
And abandon your crew?
Or would you hold fast
When the time came to choose
Between light from the sun
And the deep ocean blue?
Well what would you do? / What would you do?
What would you do? / All eyes are on you.
--------------------------------------
Orange
--------------------------------------
This one's for your empty heart
Ripped from your chest as if there was anything there from the start.
This one's for you empty hand
Held back from holding mine once more. My God, you're doing it again.
And now I'm left standing here naked
You'll burn in hell for the way that you faked it
And it's a shame, why won't you admit it?
The way that out hips pressed together so perfect...
We were like puzzle pieces.
And in my mind
You were tied
To a post along the shore
Next to a stick of dynamite.
You explode,
Your skin and bones
Turn to dust
In a magnificent flash of gold.
You were a million pieces.
This one's for the fleeting wind,
The one who laid you across the sand and spread your body parts so thin.
This one's for your bright orange shirt,
The one you wore the day you swore that we were gonna make this work.
This one's for your fucking pen,
The one you used to write the note that said, "I'm leaving you again."
And now I'm left standing here naked
You'll burn in hell for the way that you faked it
And it's a shame, why won't you admit it?
The way that out hips pressed together so perfect...
We were like puzzle pieces.
And in my mind
We were tied
To a post along the shore
Next to a stick of dynamite.
We explode,
Our skin and bones
Turn to dust
In a magnificent flash of gold.
We were a billion pieces / ...a billion puzzle pieces.
--------------------------------------
Re-Aligned
--------------------------------------
I had the feeling things would turn out okay,
We both got in our cars and we drove our separate ways.
But since that day, there's been a thought I can't escape
That speaks to me at night and keeps me awake.
I could be the one who lends you my heart and soul
(And you could be the savior that I have been looking for).
I can hold you / enclose you / till your skin is warm
(You could be my favorite calm after the thunderstorm).
"...It's alright, I'm not mad.
But in the end can we still be friends?
Or will you hold me against
Everything I've ever said?"
And now my body keeps on falling in and out of time
But when you look at me, I suddenly become re-aligned.
My thoughts, they sit like jigsaw pieces at the back of my mind
But when you look at me, i suddenly become re-aligned.
So maybe one day you could just let me walk you home
'Cause I could save you / maybe I could make you not alone.
Won't you be the high tide thats got me down on my knees?
And I'll be the undertow below, that's dragging you out to sea.
I still hear your stutter every time you'd start to speak
(And though it sucked, I will forever miss your tongue-in-cheek).
I'll never forget your lips and the way they were curved
(Lacquered in lip gloss and hanging on to my every word).
"...It's alright, I'm not mad.
But in the end can we still be friends?
Or will you choke and talk again
About the days we used to spend?"
And now my body keeps on falling in and out of time
But when you look at me, I suddenly become re-aligned.
My thoughts, they sit like jigsaw pieces at the back of my mind
But when you look at me, i suddenly become re-aligned.
My heart keeps skipping beats inside my chest / all of the time
But when you look at me, I suddenly become re-aligned.
My skin is falling off / my bones are cracking / but now I find
That all I have to do is look at you to be re-aligned.
--------------------------------------
Arson on the West Coast
--------------------------------------
Well we once set this ship on fire / just sow e could see it burn
And we were watching from a distance / as the rudder over turned,
People screaming, people sinking / people praying to their God
While the waves swept clean the deck / just like a brand new parking lot.
The mast, it cracked; the hull collapsed / such as a fragile house of cards
As people's hands broke through the surface / in a sea of sprinkled shards.
Reaching out for a higher hope / all of which had just then been erased
When in a flame of bitter taste / the ship and crew were laid to waste.
If you were the captain
Well what would you do?
Would you break from the ship
And abandon your crew?
Or would you hold fast
When the time came to choose
Between light from the sun
And the deep ocean blue?
Well what would you do? / What would you do?
What would you do? / All eyes are on you.
--------------------------------------
Orange
--------------------------------------
This one's for your empty heart
Ripped from your chest as if there was anything there from the start.
This one's for you empty hand
Held back from holding mine once more. My God, you're doing it again.
And now I'm left standing here naked
You'll burn in hell for the way that you faked it
And it's a shame, why won't you admit it?
The way that out hips pressed together so perfect...
We were like puzzle pieces.
And in my mind
You were tied
To a post along the shore
Next to a stick of dynamite.
You explode,
Your skin and bones
Turn to dust
In a magnificent flash of gold.
You were a million pieces.
This one's for the fleeting wind,
The one who laid you across the sand and spread your body parts so thin.
This one's for your bright orange shirt,
The one you wore the day you swore that we were gonna make this work.
This one's for your fucking pen,
The one you used to write the note that said, "I'm leaving you again."
And now I'm left standing here naked
You'll burn in hell for the way that you faked it
And it's a shame, why won't you admit it?
The way that out hips pressed together so perfect...
We were like puzzle pieces.
And in my mind
We were tied
To a post along the shore
Next to a stick of dynamite.
We explode,
Our skin and bones
Turn to dust
In a magnificent flash of gold.
We were a billion pieces / ...a billion puzzle pieces.
--------------------------------------
Re-Aligned
--------------------------------------
I had the feeling things would turn out okay,
We both got in our cars and we drove our separate ways.
But since that day, there's been a thought I can't escape
That speaks to me at night and keeps me awake.
I could be the one who lends you my heart and soul
(And you could be the savior that I have been looking for).
I can hold you / enclose you / till your skin is warm
(You could be my favorite calm after the thunderstorm).
"...It's alright, I'm not mad.
But in the end can we still be friends?
Or will you hold me against
Everything I've ever said?"
And now my body keeps on falling in and out of time
But when you look at me, I suddenly become re-aligned.
My thoughts, they sit like jigsaw pieces at the back of my mind
But when you look at me, i suddenly become re-aligned.
So maybe one day you could just let me walk you home
'Cause I could save you / maybe I could make you not alone.
Won't you be the high tide thats got me down on my knees?
And I'll be the undertow below, that's dragging you out to sea.
I still hear your stutter every time you'd start to speak
(And though it sucked, I will forever miss your tongue-in-cheek).
I'll never forget your lips and the way they were curved
(Lacquered in lip gloss and hanging on to my every word).
"...It's alright, I'm not mad.
But in the end can we still be friends?
Or will you choke and talk again
About the days we used to spend?"
And now my body keeps on falling in and out of time
But when you look at me, I suddenly become re-aligned.
My thoughts, they sit like jigsaw pieces at the back of my mind
But when you look at me, i suddenly become re-aligned.
My heart keeps skipping beats inside my chest / all of the time
But when you look at me, I suddenly become re-aligned.
My skin is falling off / my bones are cracking / but now I find
That all I have to do is look at you to be re-aligned.