Fell in love with my best friend

[Alyssaamary]

I've known my best friend for almost three years now. When I first met him, our intentions we're on dating, until he found another girl and cut all ties. I guess I wasn't suprised, he had always been a player. He contacted me about a year ago, this time we went into it strictly as friends. A few months later a drunken night started a "friends with benefits" relationship. He asked me to keep it between us so our friends didnt know. We also agreed we wouldnt see other people. After a couple of issues with my roommate, he offered to let me stay with him. A couple of months ago I found out he was talking to other girls. He argued it was okay because it was only talking and he was with me at the end of the night. He is always telling me how much he loves me and that im the only girl to ever make him feel this way, but he cant take the relationship further because of things going on his life. I tried not to get too attatched because of what happened before and Im still apprehensive on how he really feels. I just cant understand why no one can know and why it has to stay like this if he cares so much. I fell in love with my best friend. Am I being a sucker?

[apoemtothedead]

From the sounds of it, yes you are sucking.

[Drew Beringer]

too long, did not read

[oneswiftmotion]

Yes, you are. You have to let him go, because you want a real relationship, and all he wants is you to be home at night if he doesn't get some "booty." A relationship is both people having their needs met, and this certainly isn't what's going on here. Leave his place, and the best thing to do is forget him, because it will just cause you pain when you see him with other people if you stay friends.

[Alyssaamary]

too long, did not read


haha but you had time to write that

[apoemtothedead]

Drew, that seems like disrespecting a staff member to me. Ban this bitch.

[Alyssaamary]

Yes, you are. You have to let him go, because you want a real relationship, and all he wants is you to be home at night if he doesn't get some "booty." A relationship is both people having their needs met, and this certainly isn't what's going on here. Leave his place, and the best thing to do is forget him, because it will just cause you pain when you see him with other people if you stay friends.


I've tried to leave. We end up getting into the huge fights and he breaks down telling me how he cant lose me. Its hard to leave someone who could be pouring their heart out.

[Alyssaamary]

Drew, that seems like disrespecting a staff member to me. Ban this bitch.


?? haha implies joking hun.

[oneswiftmotion]

I've tried to leave. We end up getting into the huge fights and he breaks down telling me how he cant lose me. Its hard to leave someone who could be pouring their heart out.

He's not pouring his heart out if he doesn't even want other people to know about your intimate relationship. Its obvious he doesn't care about you, and he's lying about losing you. All he wants, as I said before, is for you to be home at night if he doesn't get some ass. Leave him, it's the best thing to do, or you'll end up being even more hurt.

[konvalbr]

yes, not healthy. get out immediately.

[FatJordan]

too long, did not read

The staff finally understands us 'personal life' members...

[Hamlet]

The staff finally understands us 'personal life' members...

They're getting there... correct apathetic response would be "tl;dr" for brevity.

[anamericangod]

He doesn't love you.

He never will.

[oneswiftmotion]

He doesn't love you.

He never will.

That's even better, and a lot simpler.

[lauren<3s music]

He doesn't love you.

He never will.

this is the truth. accept it now and be hurt or accept it later and be hurt x 100.

[thetrueblood]

this is the truth. accept it now and be hurt or accept it later and be hurt x 100.

hurt x 100 is serious business.

[lauren<3s music]

hurt x 100 is serious business.

i know. don't mess around with the hurt x 100.

[Alyssaamary]

Guess I should be looking for a new place then. I feel like I need a big reason to leave. So I can justify me staying away because I know if I don't I'll be back. Like waiting for a fight, even though it sounds wrong.

[jwelborn]

Yeah, I did this to a lady once, its a pretty douchebag thing to do actually. But to be honest, he probably just likes the constant lay he is getting from you, and he wants to keep this "secret" so he can keep talking to other girls and they won't know about it.

[lake of tears]

sweet

[SingleDoubt]

boo fucking hoo. you are most definitely a sucker. get over it.

[IamTheINDUSTRY]

Yeah, I did this to a lady once, its a pretty douchebag thing to do actually. But to be honest, he probably just likes the constant lay he is getting from you, and he wants to keep this "secret" so he can keep talking to other girls and they won't know about it.

nail on the head.

your the comfort from the sound of it. it sucks to think of yourself that way, but you can look at it like your really getting used. hes obviously getting his needs met in the situation. so why would he want a change? stuff wont ever change.

[Dan CiTi]

nail on the head.

your the comfort from the sound of it. it sucks to think of yourself that way, but you can look at it like your really getting used. hes obviously getting his needs met in the situation. so why would he want a change? stuff wont ever change.

I second this.

[Dan1234]

Your situation sounds like it's gonna explode up in yo face. I enjoyed the hurt X 100 comments, haha, because they are so true.

[pilot_light_out]

do what John Cusak did

[MADSTA]

I dated my best guy friend. Now he hates me, and it's really awkward.
That probably has nothing to do with your post, but it's what the title reminded me of.

[vixsummer]

At this point, he's not even being a good friend to you, let alone a good boyfriend/lover/whatever. You're living together and you're in love with him. Ultimately, I'm guessing, you want him to commit to a serious relationship - but YOU are already serious and he's still playing the field. You two aren't even in the same book, forget the same page. Be strong and walk away while you still have some semblance of dignity.

*note: I can sympathize more than you know, having dated and then been enagaged to my male best friend. Now we don't speak, and it could have been avoided. I knew his games, I watched him play other girls when we were just friends, and I was in denial that he would do that to me. If you want him in your life at all, it can't be in this capacity. He's shown you who he really is, and sadly, he's not going to change, no matter how desperately you want him to.

[dannytheschid]

sounds like what you want and what he wants don't fit. Move on.

[nonamesleft]

Summarize what you wrote, it's too long.

[Alyssaamary]

Summarize what you wrote, it's too long.



I started an intimate relationship with my best friend and i moved in with him a few months ago because of problems with a roommate. He doesnt want to take it past friendship because of things going on in his life, in his defense he does have some serious things going on. but he also wants to keep everything a secret from our other friends. And apparently im the idiot whose falling for it... and him.


thats as short as I could get it lol

[popdisaster00]

Yeah, I'm not trying to shit on your face here (figure of speech), but it doesn't really sound like he really loves you or really wants to be with you. I mean, if he did, he'd want people to know, he wouldn't talk to other ladies, and you guys would have that official title attached to you guys. I think he doesn't want to lose a friend with benefits. And granted I have no idea who this kid is or what your relationship is, this is the best advice I can give on a forum (which is what you are asking for).

I'd get out before it gets worse.

[Roboman]

I've known my best friend for almost three years now. When I first met him, our intentions we're on dating, until he found another girl and cut all ties. I guess I wasn't suprised, he had always been a player. He contacted me about a year ago, this time we went into it strictly as friends. A few months later a drunken night started a "friends with benefits" relationship. He asked me to keep it between us so our friends didnt know. We also agreed we wouldnt see other people. After a couple of issues with my roommate, he offered to let me stay with him. A couple of months ago I found out he was talking to other girls. He argued it was okay because it was only talking and he was with me at the end of the night. He is always telling me how much he loves me and that im the only girl to ever make him feel this way, but he cant take the relationship further because of things going on his life. I tried not to get too attatched because of what happened before and Im still apprehensive on how he really feels. I just cant understand why no one can know and why it has to stay like this if he cares so much. I fell in love with my best friend. Am I being a sucker?

Pretty sure you answered your own question.

[nonamesleft]

Move on

[BridgeJumper]

Only advice I can give, cause I'm a sucker too, is to ask yourself, is it worth the pain?

If you can put up with always questioning this issue, then stay, your own fault when it breaks.

But if it's not worth it, then why stay? Why put up with the bullshit, with the questioning and trust issues?

Life is simple. Things are simply existing, or non-existing. Is your relationship existing? Or is it his simple joy?

[#WhiteFender#]

sorry, hun, i know it must hurt to hear all this... but yeah. get out as soon as syou can... he doesnt really care for anyone but himself. you deserve better, im sure.

[breaking news!]

bad idea.

[Alyssaamary]

sorry, hun, i know it must hurt to hear all this... but yeah. get out as soon as syou can... he doesnt really care for anyone but himself. you deserve better, im sure.



really does suck. but it sounds like everyone knows what they are talking about

[leezer]

it'll be a time thing, in about 3 months you'll have moved on

[secretemily]

he's just using you. leave him.

[Chancetobe]

This guy sounds like a dick, you probably shouldn't even give him the time of day.

[Alyssaamary]

I left last night. Crashing on my parents couch crushed, miserable, and heart broken. Sucks.Thanks everyone

[williek311]

Hahahaha you are pathetic.

[Alyssaamary]

Hahahaha you are pathetic.


oh gee I really hope your calling me pathetic. I didn't leave him because of a forum.. we fought about this yea, and he decided to finally share with me that he's gotten back into coke after he'd been clean for over 5 months. So I left. Pathetic, I know.

[williek311]

Well I just read the original post and didn't see that you had already left him, so I apologize for calling you pathetic. Good for you though. He was obviously just using you as a constant piece of ass that he could come back to time and time again. A guy like that is worthy no ones love.

[whoaitsailsa]

dump him and then go rent john tucker must die.

[Alyssaamary]

Well I just read the original post and didn't see that you had already left him, so I apologize for calling you pathetic. Good for you though. He was obviously just using you as a constant piece of ass that he could come back to time and time again. A guy like that is worthy no ones love.


Thank you

[Nametekken]

your perfect for him.. free ass... aka he is playing you.

[WaltWizzle]

Well I just read the original post and didn't see that you had already left him, so I apologize for calling you pathetic. Good for you though. He was obviously just using you as a constant piece of ass that he could come back to time and time again. A guy like that is worthy no ones love.
PWNAGE