a song...

[popdisaster530]

I don't if i like these lyrics or not, its one of the first songs i've written, so please comment/critizise!

VERSE 1
I'm having trouble yea i just can't understand
one minute i look up and i'm your best friend
then i turn the corner and i'm utterly abhored
all of the sudden i'm completely ignored

it's not that i can't overcome this little strife
it's just that i've never been more confused in my life

I knew a girl who wasn't afraid of anything
but now it's looking like popularity intervened

CHORUS
But I'll get over it
yea I'll move on
I thought i knew you but i guess i was wrong
(repeat 2x)

VERSE 2
I knew a kid who made the best out of his world
THen one day yea One day he met a girl
they got together and decided theyd be friends
nothing'd be kept between them they were friends to the end

THat was his greatest Travesty
mistake that led to Tradgedy

NOw hes all alone hes on his own he's free
who knew freedom could bring so much misery

CHORUS

SOLO

CHORUS

That's pretty much it. It's really fast paced and guitar driven.

P.S. I haven't named it, so any suggestions are great

[thexflamesxburn]

it seems alright, i'd like to hear it as a whole song tho because its hard to tell...

careful with the rhyming, too much makes it too amateur

[blink182drumagh]

hey u want a title...how about IM A LIL FREAK THAT WRITES STUPID SONGS AND CANT RHYME IF I WAS TRAPPED IN A CARDBOARD BOX W/ A RABBID LLAMA THAT HAS ROTTEN FANGS THAT JUST SANK DOWN IN MY NECK!...sry but dude u suck at writin songs....i mean u must be a real jackass....god....im appallad at how bad u r....hey idea...stop breathin our good air and kill urself...pig bastard

-guy williamson-:goofy:

[popdisaster530]

Hey, can anyone think of a name for this song?? I've been calling it "Get Over It" but if you've got a better suggestion that'd be great.

[PrEtTynPuNkRoCk]

I think your song is good... It has potential to be better though...