Urinals

[Ikilledherdream]

Fuck man. I hate it when people piss right next to you.
Today, the shit house what virtually empty, I pull into a urinal and wait for the natural flow.
This kid comes out of nowhere and walks to the pisser next to me. I mean the whole place was empty and he had to make it awkward. As if that wasn't bad enough, another kid starts pissing in the pisser on the other side.

[Smash Adams]

I can't use urinals at all, the whole concept seems kinda gay to me
also how did he not know the 1 3 5 rule?

[thespearkid]

I use them out of convenience. I'd rather use a urinal elbow to elbow with twenty guys then walk an extra ten feet for a stall. Plus, the stalls smell (and look) like shit.

[bailmeout13]

Didn't realize people have such a problem with urinals. I do get what the original poster is saying about the whole right next to someone when there are openings elsewhere part of things.

[oface0315]

I can't use urinals at all, the whole concept seems kinda gay to me
also how did he not know the 1 3 5 rule?

lol at naming how to not making peeing in urinals awkward.

[brentkid]

Ever since sophomore year when a teacher of mine pissed two urinals away from me, I have never used one.

[JimGray]

I know a guy who pooped in a urinal.

[chronomic]

i think its a useful time to show my massive amount of manliness to other men to establish my dominance over them.



before i anally rape them, that is. thats just pure dominance.

[JimGray]

Hawt^

[Willy McFurgle]

I'll never forget the night I was at a urinal in a bar and some blonde chick comes stormin in and squats at the urinal next to mine, then started a conversation with me about the line for the girls room. good times.

[anamericangod]

Pissing next to a teacher is incredibly weird.

[brentkid]

Pissing next to a teacher is incredibly weird.
It was too awkward to handle.

[3mpire]

I don't mind it until some dude just goes in the one next to you. Awkward...

[Greg]

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/urinal

do it

[Skadrist]

The urinal fart also leads to awkward situations.

[KidRobot]

Every guy should know about the 1 3 5 rule

[Neo Cassady]

http://xlforum.net/vbportal/forums/customavatars/avatar3025_20.gif

[checkered.stars]

Being female sure is fun.

[SLoT]

lol at naming how to not making peeing in urinals awkward.
whoa whoa whoa! how do you not know about the Buffer Rules of Urinal Usage? buffer space while in a bathroom is incredibly important and all rules should be followed at all times. there is a test online somewhere. find it. take it. pass it. and ill see you in a bathroom sometime soon to test your knowledge.

[lovely864md]

I'm glad I don't have this problem.

[chronomic]

i was once at the trainstation bathroom which had like 30 urinals all empty, and this dude (who followed me in btw) went to the one right next to me at the same time i pulled up to mine. and ontop of that he was trying to lean into me. i pissed for about 2 seconds, cut the stream off and ran. so fucked up.

[llwilliamsll]

Sounds like something me and my friends would do...I've done the pants and boxers at the ankle urinal pis with a lot of people present thing

[Fallinto_rhythm]

I use them out of convenience. I'd rather use a urinal elbow to elbow with twenty guys then walk an extra ten feet for a stall. Plus, the stalls smell (and look) like shit.


The guys stalls probably don't look as bad as the girls do.


i was once at the trainstation bathroom which had like 30 urinals all empty, and this dude (who followed me in btw) went to the one right next to me at the same time i pulled up to mine. and ontop of that he was trying to lean into me. i pissed for about 2 seconds, cut the stream off and ran. so fucked up.

I would have yelled and asked what the fuck his deal was. But then he probably would have tried to punish you and I wouldn't want to stick around for that.

[Greg]

whoa whoa whoa! how do you not know about the Buffer Rules of Urinal Usage? buffer space while in a bathroom is incredibly important and all rules should be followed at all times. there is a test online somewhere. find it. take it. pass it. and ill see you in a bathroom sometime soon to test your knowledge.
i posted the link above already

[fulltiltxb00gie]

I'm glad I don't have this problem.

very true.
we just have to wait in a line for a minimum of twenty minutes to piss.

[Kassie09]

My pee has anxiety about coming out, I could never use a urinal, I have issues when other people are just in the bathroom.

[Ikilledherdream]

sometimes i just go in the stall even if there are a lot open. i just hate peeing in urinals.

[White Noise]

I don't use urinals.

[Spewk]

I know a guy who pooped in a urinal.
I did that because I really couldn't wait for the stalls to open up. That bathroom hasn't been unlocked since.

[Spewk]

You should have peed on his shoes.

[11:11]

Whats also bad is if the guy next to you looks over, or those times when you're just standing there and the piss won't stop.

[lovely864md]

My pee has anxiety about coming out, I could never use a urinal, I have issues when other people are just in the bathroom.

Me too I have the shyest bladder in the world. I wait around fixing my hair until the bathroom is empty.

[Smash Adams]

sometimes i just go in the stall even if there are a lot open. i just hate peeing in urinals.

I don't use urinals.

I thought I was the only one


My pee has anxiety about coming out, I could never use a urinal, I have issues when other people are just in the bathroom.
so that's normal? phew I thought I had some sort of bladder issues and was gonna need surgery

[Ikilledherdream]

I thought I was the only one



so that's normal? phew I thought I had some sort of bladder issues and was gonna need surgery

hahahahahaha. i had those same fears. i was like oh god, my bladder is not functioning.

[lovely864md]

I can't imagine peeing in front of random strangers.

[Ikilledherdream]

after a while you get used to it. i just try to stare at the wall or sing a song to get that awkward moment gone. i hate it when the guy next to you isn't peeing either because then its just terrible.

[lovely864md]

after a while you get used to it. i just try to stare at the wall or sing a song to get that awkward moment gone. i hate it when the guy next to you isn't peeing either because then its just terrible.

Pep talk!

[RamInGoreville]

The mexican kids at my school have knife fights in the bathrooms. And one time they broke off the wall thing separating the urinals...I had to look at kid's floppin' their twanger's around for like a week.

[Hamlet]

Anyone mentioned Maddox's section on Urinal Etiquette in The Alphabet of Manliness yet?

[wewascontenders]

Our urinals at school suck. The end's both shoot water all over your feet when they flush.

[PepsiOne]

I love urinals at school, because there's always this one friend of mine that's peeing at one, with a messenger bag across his chest, and its fun knocking the strap off his shoulder and the strap knocking his dick out of his hand and he urinates all over himself.

[lovely864md]

I love urinals at school, because there's always this one friend of mine that's peeing at one, with a messenger bag across his chest, and its fun knocking the strap off his shoulder and the strap knocking his dick out of his hand and he urinates all over himself.

You are the winner.

[wewascontenders]

That's fucking gross. I hope one time they turn around and piss on you.

[lovely864md]

Uranal

[wewascontenders]

as opposed to what? myanal.

[PepsiOne]

That's fucking gross. I hope one time they turn around and piss on you.

I don't worry, he just thinks his messenger bag keeps slipping off as a result of him slouching, because whenever i do it i walk away.

He'll come up to me in the hallway like "dude i need a new fucking backpack this one never stays on when i take a piss"

I'm not an asshole, he just likes to fuck with me, so as a result, i fuck with him back.

[lovely864md]

as opposed to what? myanal.

I don't want your anal! Keep that to yourself, man

[wewascontenders]

Oh right, you want a urinal.

[Siren Silently]

None of the bathrooms at my schools have the screens separating the urinals.

[Mrs.Sweeny Todd]

nice

[thesafeword]

Nice!

[Ikilledherdream]

Anyone mentioned Maddox's section on Urinal Etiquette in The Alphabet of Manliness yet?

Yeah, that was hilarious.

[JimGray]

I did that because I really couldn't wait for the stalls to open up. That bathroom hasn't been unlocked since.

Nice, I want to someday.

[ActionActionFan]

I don't mind urinals when there is a seperater between each of them but when there isn't then they are really awkward.

[SLoT]

i posted the link above already
haha, alright. probably while i was typing that load of shit.

[Ikilledherdream]

So today I was taking a piss, and finished up and all that good shit.
Well there were people in there. Another thing I realized I hate it the washing hands desicion.

[matt_bergeron]

one time a blind guy hit me with his walking stick thing right in the ass while using a urinal ........at least i hope he was blind.....oh man

[matt_bergeron]

So today I was taking a piss, and finished up and all that good shit.
Well there were people in there. Another thing I realized I hate it the washing hands desicion.

what decision? fucking wash your hands, thats sick

[Ikilledherdream]

fuck that. it's not like i get piss on my hands. i barely touch my wang anyway.
its a waste.

[pilot_light_out]

if you shake it three times your playing with it

[SLoT]

fuck that. it's not like i get piss on my hands. i barely touch my wang anyway.
its a waste.
You sir, are going to hell. Jus' sayin'.

[Spewk]

Nice, I want to someday.
Nah, you really don't. There's no toliet paper.

[Ikilledherdream]

You sir, are going to hell. Jus' sayin'.

The moment anyone steps into absolute punk, they are doomed to the fiery lakes.
But I'm atheist.
So I couldn't care less.

[theguy77]

its weirdset when the person in the urinal starts trying to talk to you. i act deaf.

[June_Bug]

Being female sure is fun.

Not when you go into the stall after some chick who's on her rag. Take a can of spray with you ladies please. Be kind. Oh, or when you use it after a teacher (one of yours) and you smell must or the other thing. It's just really strange.

[bobby runs]

We had one that was overflowing for two weeks since dumbasses couldn't tell it wasn't flushing. It was nasty, especially if you wear sandals.

[SLoT]

The moment anyone steps into absolute punk, they are doomed to the fiery lakes.
But I'm atheist.
So I couldn't care less.
You sneaky bastard. Well in light of this evidence, you sir are now going to nothing but book clubs with old woman for all of eternity. The only thing is they re-review the same book forever. I hope you like The Joy Luck Club.

[kwsqd]

its weirdset when the person in the urinal starts trying to talk to you. i act deaf.

I usually initiate the conversation with something like: I see the apple didn't fall too far from the tree.

[Ikilledherdream]

You sneaky bastard. Well in light of this evidence, you sir are now going to nothing but book clubs with old woman for all of eternity. The only thing is they re-review the same book forever. I hope you like The Joy Luck Club.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!

[ActionActionFan]

This might be a weird question but when pissing in a urinal where do you look...straight ahead, down at your shlong, something to the side, up towards the ceiling

[SLoT]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!
Haha! You've brought this upon yourself.

[kwsqd]

This might be a weird question but when pissing in a urinal where do you look...straight ahead, down at your shlong, something to the side, up towards the ceiling

anywhere but to the right and left.

[Ikilledherdream]

This might be a weird question but when pissing in a urinal where do you look...straight ahead, down at your shlong, something to the side, up towards the ceiling

I always look at the wall. If i stare at the meat i start to freeze up.

[YouAteMyDog182]

The urinal fart also leads to awkward situations.

Lmao.
Yea it is.

I'll be you know, flowin, then I'll laugh due to thinking of something funny then fart, than laugh cuz i Farted and then fart again because I laughed because I farted.

yea.
its a great cycle.

[jagermeister]

I used a urinal the other day for the first time in years.

[llwilliamsll]

I used a urinal the other day for the first time in years.
congrats on that....felt good didn't it.

[Ikilledherdream]

Another awkward thing is when the urinal flushes and you're not done.

[Willy McFurgle]

Awkward urinal story would be walking into a bathroom and seeing a dude puking in a urinal he started pissin in, and while he was pukin in it, he was crouched on the floor still pissin his little heart out.

[FayeQC]

My phone was once put into a urinal as an awful joke and I was torn between retrieving it or not

[LV03]

i never realized that peeing in urinals was a problem for guys. Also i always thought the stalls were only used for taking dumps.

[pinkluv13]

i never realized that peeing in urinals was a problem for guys. Also i always thought the stalls were only used for taking dumps.

so did i until i saw a line of guys coming out of the boys room at school. i figured everyone had to take a crap but apparently no one wanted to use the urinals. but hey, serves them right with chicks having to wait a flipping hour to pee.

[The_kok]

sometimes when I'm drunk and pissing in a urinal, I start talking to random strangers about how small my penis is

[mrzippo3]

Lmao.
Yea it is.

I'll be you know, flowin, then I'll laugh due to thinking of something funny then fart, than laugh cuz i Farted and then fart again because I laughed because I farted.

yea.
its a great cycle.

sometimes when I'm drunk and pissing in a urinal, I start talking to random strangers about how small my penis is
lol.


Seriously though, the little tv screens some places have at urinals, are the greatest things ever.

[diehtc0ke]

A lot of times in Europe I find that there is no wall between urinals. Also, sometimes I pee in a trough.