Wow, wrote this like 5 minutes ago...

[BuriedAlive]

It's about a pretty cliche topic, parents, but this has really been affecting me. And I had to pour it out somehow. And I figured I would do it the best I knew how. so I wrote it in a song/poem (whichever you would wanna call it) I don't have a title.. if you guys have any suggestions or comments just post 'em!


Why cant you open your eyes?
understand that your opinion isn't always right
forget the fact that your a "parent"
that word so fake in it's own content
you're nothing like an average parent
you are only here to bring torment
you watch from your position
as I cry myself to sleep
and repeat "I hate you"
as I fall into a dream
a dream that doesnt consist of you
you both only fuel my hate

you always say "I'm sorry"
so false that there was no point in saying
another day, another wound
and you both become the salt,
the salt in my wound
which keeps it from healing
and with every insult you throw
it makes the wound only softer
the thrift store can't even compare

you watch as the tears fall
but the screams only seem to grow louder
I'm alone watching you both,
watching you both scream
I become less than a person
I can't drive my own life
you lead it for me
if you don't want me around
then why do you continue to keep me here?
the torment, it grows like a cancer
a cancer inside of me

but I begin everyday with a fight
a fight with you
this screaming match is useless
you always win, no matter what the score is
I'm always outnumbered, it's always 2-1
I never have the advantage
please just leave, let me be as I am
even if it isn't what you want me to be

[xxMichaelxx]

as usual, your work owns chris, the only question i have is what do you mean in the line "the thrift store can't even compare"?

[BuriedAlive]

as usual, your work owns chris, the only question i have is what do you mean in the line "the thrift store can't even compare"?
with the line above....it makes the wound only softer

the thrift store can't even compare, means that no matter how soft, in this case, a shirt... was compared to the wound. i guess i didnt make it clear enough.

i really only meant that the wound was so soft and tender that a thrift store cant compare to the softness.

and thats man.

[BuriedAlive]

any other suggestions/comments?

[MaybeOneDay]

Like said above, this owns, Chris. Really deep. I can understand what type of topic you're trying to get at with this song completely, and you did a really good job of expressing it. Great work.

[BuriedAlive]

Like said above, this owns, Chris. Really deep. I can understand what type of topic you're trying to get at with this song completely, and you did a really good job of expressing it. Great work.
thanks bud. thats always great to hear (well read). especially from a guy like you, brandon.


its just been hard on me. and expressing it this way seems to make it easier on me. but hopefully i havent let any of you guys down with my latest writing.

[MaybeOneDay]

no problem.

of course you haven't let us down, you have yet to let me down, chris.

I know exactly what you mean, i've written a song with a similar topic before.

[BuriedAlive]

no problem.

of course you haven't let us down, you have yet to let me down, chris.

I know exactly what you mean, i've written a song with a similar topic before.
well, im glad i didnt let you down. i dont want to become a disappointment to you all.

[MaybeOneDay]

don't even think for a second that you let us down. i absolutely loved this song.

[BuriedAlive]

don't even think for a second that you let us down. i absolutely loved this song.
haha. well thanks man. i just hope i can keep it up!

[MaybeOneDay]

I think you can ;) you've had no problem doing it thus far.

[BuriedAlive]

I think you can ;) you've had no problem doing it thus far.
hell ya. haha.

[MaybeOneDay]

haha. can't wait to read more.

[BuriedAlive]

haha. can't wait to read more.
alright. i will post whenever i write something new.

but any other suggestions/comments?

[BuriedAlive]

no comments?

[pUnkKid174]

no comments?
it owns, like said before...have you written before like that?
is what you say in there true...

[para ser libre]

Chris, I love it man.

Honestly you have a lot of good stuff, but for a five minute song thi tops most of it. I don't know what it is, maybe it's b/c i have had trouble with my parents in the past, but i mean who hasn't. It's good and it portrays a lot more than just what you read, I got a good sense of vivid imagery from it...Good job

[pUnkKid174]

Chris, I love it man.

Honestly you have a lot of good stuff, but for a five minute song thi tops most of it. I don't know what it is, maybe it's b/c i have had trouble with my parents in the past, but i mean who hasn't. It's good and it portrays a lot more than just what you read, I got a good sense of vivid imagery from it...Good job
yeah...exactly what he said...you really can picture it because that's what a lot of kids go through with their parents...well, at least i am....

[BuriedAlive]

it owns, like said before...have you written before like that?
is what you say in there true...
this is actually my first effort at this topic. and yes what i have written is more than true. it happens to my girlfriend. she calls me crying like every night because of her parents. but thanks man.

[BuriedAlive]

Chris, I love it man.

Honestly you have a lot of good stuff, but for a five minute song thi tops most of it. I don't know what it is, maybe it's b/c i have had trouble with my parents in the past, but i mean who hasn't. It's good and it portrays a lot more than just what you read, I got a good sense of vivid imagery from it...Good job
thanks man. really its people like you and everyone else who post and atleast tells me something about the song and how it linked to me that makes me wanna continue to write. but if you dont mind me asking what is your name?

[Lueda Alia]

First off... great poem. I like it :)

& second off... sorry about what you're going through sweetie :( ::hug::

[BuriedAlive]

First off... great poem. I like it :)

& second off... sorry about what you're going through sweetie :( ::hug::
thanks. your hug helped!

[Sarah R]

man these are great i love them, they are very descriptive

[BuriedAlive]

man these are great i love them, they are very descriptive
well thanks!

[aurora]

I like it alot Chris! It really grabs your attention, you can kind of hear you in it, ya know what I mean? I dont know, you have a very clear voice and style, thats a better way to explain it...Anyway, great job!

[BuriedAlive]

I like it alot Chris! It really grabs your attention, you can kind of hear you in it, ya know what I mean? I dont know, you have a very clear voice and style, thats a better way to explain it...Anyway, great job!
wow, you can hear my voice in the song. thats kinda creepy. but fucking cool at the same time! haha, thanks katy!

[aurora]

wow, you can hear my voice in the song. thats kinda creepy. but fucking cool at the same time! haha, thanks katy!

Not literally your voice or anything, haha :grin: Just, it has a personal feel about it, you can tell that its you, like its your style or something.

[BuriedAlive]

Not literally your voice or anything, haha :grin: Just, it has a personal feel about it, you can tell that its you, like its your style or something.
haha. ok i get it now. thanks.

[para ser libre]

thanks man. really its people like you and everyone else who post and atleast tells me something about the song and how it linked to me that makes me wanna continue to write. but if you dont mind me asking what is your name?


Adam...but everyone calls me Lil' B......
Ha ha, or not, i might have to start swingin' if someone called me that...

[BuriedAlive]

Adam...but everyone calls me Lil' B......
Ha ha, or not, i might have to start swingin' if someone called me that...
haha... lil' B? why did they call you that... but ya nice to meet you Adam.

[pUnkKid174]

this is actually my first effort at this topic. and yes what i have written is more than true. it happens to my girlfriend. she calls me crying like every night because of her parents. but thanks man.
aww...dude, that's got to be tough on you...

[BuriedAlive]

aww...dude, that's got to be tough on you...
ya, and its even worse because I can't do anything about it.

[pUnkKid174]

ya, and its even worse because I can't do anything about it.
does she live further away from you to where you cant go to her house easily?

[BuriedAlive]

does she live further away from you to where you cant go to her house easily?
its not that. its that her parents arent completely english... they dont completely understand it fluently. plus if i try to do anything i wont be able to see her. because her mom wont let me if i tried to stick up for her.

[pUnkKid174]

its not that. its that her parents arent completely english... they dont completely understand it fluently. plus if i try to do anything i wont be able to see her. because her mom wont let me if i tried to stick up for her.
pwned...have you tried to before and gotten in trouble...aww just take care of her the best you can whenever you can then eh...

[BuriedAlive]

pwned...have you tried to before and gotten in trouble...aww just take care of her the best you can whenever you can then eh...
ya, i am doing the best i can... but thanks for the concern... and i mean that sincerely.

[para ser libre]

ya, i am doing the best i can... but thanks for the concern... and i mean that sincerely.

My good friend is kind of like this. She has trouble with her parents and she always calls or i call and talk about it, but she tells me i can't stick up for her...

Obviously your's is a little worse than mine and all, but i just wanted to let you know i can understand a small amount of what it is your trying to deal with...

[pUnkKid174]

ya, i am doing the best i can... but thanks for the concern... and i mean that sincerely.
ah thanks dude...

[BuriedAlive]

My good friend is kind of like this. She has trouble with her parents and she always calls or i call and talk about it, but she tells me i can't stick up for her...

Obviously your's is a little worse than mine and all, but i just wanted to let you know i can understand a small amount of what it is your trying to deal with...
well, its good to know im not completely alone. and thanks youre a good man.

[BuriedAlive]

any suggestions on the song?

[BuriedAlive]

bump bump bump

[TravvPoopington]

Wanna see my butt?

[BuriedAlive]

Wanna see my butt?
sure, haha. where you been at?

[pUnkKid174]

bump bump bumpi never knew what that meant eh...sadly i see it all the time and just kind of stare at teh screen for a few seconds and move on...

[BuriedAlive]

i never knew what that meant eh...sadly i see it all the time and just kind of stare at teh screen for a few seconds and move on...
haha

[pUnkKid174]

hahawhat

[BuriedAlive]

what
about what you said. i found it funny.

[pUnkKid174]

about what you said. i found it funny.but whats it mean eh...never knew...

[BuriedAlive]

it doesnt really have a meaning. its just something to move your songs up to where people can read it. haha. like to "bump" it up.

[pUnkKid174]

oh...

[BuriedAlive]

yeah... any comments about the song?

[failedbullets]

A really fuckin late one, but yeah. actually you've already heard this one before, but i can totally realte. Parents can be mean and unforgiving as hell. My brother moved out and things got easier around here for me, but it was never really anything like what your g/f must go through.

Sad to hear, sorry dude. But hey, cool fuckin song and keep writing cuz I'm enjoin reading

[BuriedAlive]

A really fuckin late one, but yeah. actually you've already heard this one before, but i can totally realte. Parents can be mean and unforgiving as hell. My brother moved out and things got easier around here for me, but it was never really anything like what your g/f must go through.

Sad to hear, sorry dude. But hey, cool fuckin song and keep writing cuz I'm enjoin reading
Thanks, my friend. its hard to cope with but its gotten easier.

[failedbullets]

Thanks, my friend. its hard to cope with but its gotten easier.


Names Kris by the way.

[BuriedAlive]

Names Kris by the way.
haha.. my name is Chris too. just different spelling