I think you kids will like this one..."Richer than the seasons"

[GREENatarisDAY]

This is my first piece of writing ive constructed that i actuall admire in the past month or two, let me know what you guys think...


I walked out near the shoreline
gazing back into the ocean
wishing you could float back
here with me
and I scattered through thoughts
that made me smile
and I wrote words that could have
lasted a mile
and it was all for you...

Your hands were cold as if it was winter
And it felt good just like the summer
you were beautiful like autumn
and bloomed like a flower in the spring

I tangled words through the phone line
and tonight I wont even close my eyes
ill open up the window
and fall asleep to the sunrise
reminding me of you
but Sometimes I wish I could forget you
just so we could meet
and fall in love again

[para ser libre]

Sometimes I wish I could forget you
just so we could meet
and fall in love again


that I liked...

[UrOwNdIsAsTer11]

I like it alot, a genuine love song... Being someone that writes the opposite, I don't normally appreciate it. But you have very good wordplay and also lyrics I could see myself singing along with... The line the person above pointed out if an excellent example of it.

[GREENatarisDAY]

thank you for your comments

im really glad that i could please someone who has a different perspective as well. As for me i dont really have a center or focus to my writing i go all around the board. If you look at my past posts you can probably see what im talking about. Once again, thanks for reading it and thanks for your comments.