Do you like these Lyrics???

[TheOutcastStory]

[Vrs 1]
I sit here alone
and try to remember
what it was like to be held in your arms
the morning seem to never come
it was as if we were frozen
frozen in time
Never there
but always here
Never forgetting each other
but
forgetting the world

[Chorus]
I got colder
and you held me closer
as we got older
we got closer
we never noticed those around us
only that which spared
between us

i guess what I'm trying to say is
I miss you and i need you


[Vrs 2]
The world spun faster
but we never noticed
the world grew cold
but we were together
and that was all that ever mattered
We had friends
but they always seemed to come second
Forgetting your warmth
was like forgetting
my life
But memories last


[Chorus]
I got colder
and you held me closer
as we got older
we got closer
we never noticed those around us
only that which spared
between us

i guess what I'm trying to say is
I miss you and i need you


What do you think....to sad emotional, too much like poetry to be lyrics....be harsh i need real judgement

[TheOutcastStory]

I think i just need some sleep...

[bryanpereira]

i cant apprecieate the lyrics without a tune.

[TheOutcastStory]

true...i haven't gotten there yet....the words you like???

[TheOutcastStory]

do you write music or songs....if you read my other posts you'd think im crazy

[murrich]

Those lyrics were "shuddering", GET IT?! IT WAS A PUN CAUSE YOU SAID COLD IN YOUR SONG!

I'm probably the pun master.

[TheOutcastStory]

that was funny...do you like them or should i start from scratch....im looking for some one to write a song for an upcoming short film my friend and i are making...its a horror...i have major writers block anf i wanted all the songs to be original

[murrich]

They're great, you should put something in there about burning bridges though cause that's heaps epic and original.

[TheOutcastStory]

burning bridges...how so??? like what do you mean???

[TheOutcastStory]

do you by chance do you write music...

[bryanpereira]

do you already have a tune to it ?or are you going to base the tune around the lyrics( not advisable).

I got colder
and you held me closer
as we got older
we got closer
this should be changed. repeated words dont sound nice.

but the verses are really good. there's a definite theme/tone to the song. Lyrics anyway.

[hockeyguitar99]

I can't decide which of your threads I hate more, the one that you have all of the posts in, or this one, where you have half.

[TheOutcastStory]

haha about the posts i havent slept in about 28 hours so im running purly on caffine...save the threads for general discussion and about the lyrics...i need critics not hypocrites

[murrich]

burning bridges...how so??? like what do you mean???

It doesn't need to make sense, it's metaphorical.

[TheOutcastStory]

oh got it...that makes sense now...
what about
'crossing burning bridges
only begins to explain
what i would do for you'

[TheOutcastStory]

i kind of have a tune but im not really liking it...i like the verses...what do you think about the burning bridges part??? that i was advised to add...i like them...

[TheOutcastStory]

anyone have any other thoughts that dont include my threads???

[Yes. And?]

Didn't read, not gonna, I just wanted to let you know that you're really annoying. I don't know if it's the caffeine. If so, get some sleep and try again tomorrow.

[TheOutcastStory]

Thank you for your 'wonderful' and unappreciated gratitude. and no one likes reporting hogs...as you have demonstrated yourself to be...especially if their 17-holy crap....your lying...seventeen year olds are more um how shall i put this "not annoying" and care about themselves...and who died and made you queen...i have appreciated quarreling with you as i enjoy listening to your music...by the way it makes me sad that someone would listen to such things that differ so drastically in quality and genre...

[checkered.stars]

Boring and repetitive.

[Machu505]

Quite repetitive.

[KatieKutthroat.]

Not good at all. Very generic and boring. I suggest you scrap these lyrics and start over.

[Yes. And?]

Thank you for your 'wonderful' and unappreciated gratitude. and no one likes reporting hogs...as you have demonstrated yourself to be...especially if their 17-holy crap....your lying...seventeen year olds are more um how shall i put this "not annoying" and care about themselves...and who died and made you queen...i have appreciated quarreling with you as i enjoy listening to your music...by the way it makes me sad that someone would listen to such things that differ so drastically in quality and genre...
What am I reading...

Also, don't talk to me about quality, you like Whisper War.

[checkered.stars]

Thank you for your 'wonderful' and unappreciated gratitude. and no one likes reporting hogs...as you have demonstrated yourself to be...especially if their 17-holy crap....your lying...seventeen year olds are more um how shall i put this "not annoying" and care about themselves...and who died and made you queen...i have appreciated quarreling with you as i enjoy listening to your music...by the way it makes me sad that someone would listen to such things that differ so drastically in quality and genre...
This made perfect sense. Thank you.

[TheOutcastStory]

basically you should realize how annoying you really are and not be such a brat...btw "reporting" is for babies...no one cares about your 'rep' so theres no reason to build it...you should mine your own buisness and talk what the thread is about not how 'annoying' people are...

[versus_god]

you can tell me your not seeing anyone
but i dont believe you
you can go out with that t r a m p
ill be there cause smack there i am

standing in the middle when i know you can't hold on
your gana loose it faster then the dawn comes up
so smack here i am

[lindZ629]

oh got it...that makes sense now...
what about
'crossing burning bridges
only begins to explain
what i would do for you'
No you don't actually cross burning bridges. It's not like you're going to cross the George Washington bridge while it's on fire to prove how much you care about the person. It's a metaphor.

[checkered.stars]

I hope you know that there is a Lyrics and Poetry Forum where threads like these should be.

[versus_god]

http://i218.photobucket.com/albums/cc217/anexplodingman/GreenMan.gif

[Yes. And?]

basically you should realize how annoying you really are and not be such a brat...btw "reporting" is for babies...no one cares about your 'rep' so theres no reason to build it...you should mine your own buisness and talk what the thread is about not how 'annoying' people are...
lol, oic.

[lindZ629]

Green Man is saving your life right now bro. Just go with the flow.

[Troggy]

I hope you know that there is a Lyrics and Poetry Forum where threads like these should be.

Yes then we will not have to look at them.

[checkered.stars]

Yes then we will not have to look at them.
Haha this is true.

[Yes. And?]

Yes then we will not have to look at them.
hahaha

[SanePsychotic]

I hate original lyric threads. Keep 'em to yourself.

[Angylion Gefell]

These lyrics are not good.