The Shake Up & Shake Off

[mr.lunchbox]

I write my own songs probably or usually at night when i think about things that im feeling or that have happend. I started posting here to see what other people thought .. im a boy and im 16. Check it ouuuuut ! . .



The Shake Up & Shake Off

Please take my hand, as were high off the ground
Cause this Ferris Wheels spinnin' and im not looking down
"I wanna kiss you"
"but don't know how to"
I put my hand around her and pulled her aside
All the tention from the kissing made our heartbeats collide
"And this is how I feel"
"This is so unreal"
Inside my mind

Do you recall that night
Where everything was alright

And I'll say that im better, If you'll take my hand again


Summers here but I won't come around
After hearing your answer I am speachless for sound
Im put down again
Will this ever end
My feelings are always locked up inside
And swept away like the wind from an ocean tide
"And this is how I feel"
"This is so unreal"
Inside my mind

Do you recall that night
Where everything was alright

And I'll say that im better, If you'll take my hand again


And I never knew my right from wrong
Your the girl I hear in every song
I never thought you were playing
I never thought I'd be saying

And I'll say that im better, If you'll take my hand again . .

[TheSkyline]

Not horrible, but I feel there was way to much rhyming.
Try to tone that down, and it'll be decent.