something new and untitled so far, give it a read

[beau blood rush]

wrote this tonight, it's going to be something more chill than usual.



i'm all for image
but i don't want to see you do your hair in my review mirror
i'm pretentious, vicious and surreptitious
with words like a well dressed weapon

another cheap shot in the back of the head
yet another trend that i regret
but tonights getting late
and i havn't slept for days

so slow down darling, and read between the lines like i read you
"no i'll never get over you"
so spin me around, i'm down
i've been sittin out the chance to dance with you
for long enough

i love the way she writes me poetry
far better than i could
so i'm told

open my eyes
she's sleeping off the kiss i slipped next to me
today i will
wear a smile

so slow down darling, and read between the lines like i read you
"no i'll never get over you"
so spin me around, i'm down
i've been sittin out the chance to dance with you
for long enough

so take a risk and take her wrist
and lead her to the dance floor
under flourecent lights to bedroom eyes
who knows
you might fall in love tonight

so slow down darling, and read between the lines like i read you
"no i'll never get over you"
so spin me around, i'm down
i've been sittin out the chance to dance with you
for long enough

[leezer]

I like the tempo of the chorus. Haven't read anything from you in a while, not your best piece but I do like it. Possible edits...2nd line first verse, 'review mirror'?.

And 'haven't' is spelt havn't in the last line of the second chorus.

[TK]

Too be honest, the lyrics could not stand on their own. It's as simple as that, they're mediocre. You're band could do a wonder with them though, because almost every song I've heard is extremely catchy.

[lew_1987]

I agree with Travis here, I don't think these lyrics stand on their own. I wouldn't really like them in a song either I don't think. Sorry, these just don't appeal to me.

[intl p]

from a another song writer: that WAS garbage.

[TK]

from a another song writer: that WAS garbage.

I haven't seen you post anything, so why do you post something and show people what isn't "garbage"?

[beau blood rush]

yeh with this song i just wanted to do something a little more honest
all the sweet imagery tends to lean towards depressing songs, and i wanted to write something a little more hopeful for my girlfriend
i'll show you the song once it is done, i think you guys might have a little more respect for it.
take care.

[amylyn]

decenttt.
you've got some good lines in there, but it COULD be better. But it's still a good idea. :]