Stay together for the kids...

[Kif]

So at the moment I am in a bit of a pickle. Here's the short story;

My dad split up with my mum ages ago, and got married last year. I didn't feel that close to him now he had a new family, so we stopped talking in February. I was pretty depressed about that, but this month he contacted me and asked to meet up. So we did, shot some pool and got some lunch. Everything is mmmkay again, right?

But I'm having doubts about it. At pool, he didn't seem to put that much effort into talk, and to be honest, neither did I. We don't have that much in common either (He is more into rock and indie, I like pop punk and emo, he is very into football and stuff, I am not so into it). And I am just starting my A-Levels at school and he has a new family and friends to look after.

So I have no idea what to do. Should I continue to see him, pretending to want to be there, or should I tell him that I think it's best if we don't see each other?

[Mercy Medical]

It's up to you what you want to do, if you really don't want to see him anymore and you feel like you're pretending you want to be there, then don't do it. Who knows, maybe down the road you'll get over that and you'll want to see him again. I'd figure just keep contact numbers and what not if there was ever a chance you wanted to talk to him or see him again...

[Touched]

Well if you haven't spoken to each other for more than half a year you're either gonna have loads to talk about or almost nothing at all. Relationships between parents and children are usually restricted when it comes to what you can talk about, it may just be a gradual process into talking...more. I say keep meeting up with him every now and again and things may smoothen out. It is up to you though.

[Tyler Revolution]

Just do what your heart tells you to do. I've never been in this situation, but I understand its hard. I agree with Touched about not having much to talk about... and I think once you and your father get to know each other better and start to feel more comfortable around each other, then it will be easier and you'll grow closer together. He called you to meet up and it is obvious that he is trying to start a relationship with you, so I would say just keep talking and see how things go. Good luck.

[Brit_Ben]

i had the same problem, but if u both dont talk much nothin will happan, mate if u start talkin n put effort in you'l get it back.

[_astheruinfalls]

I have had the same exact problem. Personally I found it easier to not deal with it. Granted, there was more to it, but whatever.

The thing is you have to decide what you want to do. The fact that you don't listen to the same music means you guys can talk about different bands and stuff. Maybe you can find a medium? There's more to life than sports and music.

Good luck with whatever you choose.

[commatosa]

Sounds to me like you're in desperate need of Dr. Phil. Check out his book "Family First"

[Kif]

I have had the same exact problem. Personally I found it easier to not deal with it. Granted, there was more to it, but whatever.

The thing is you have to decide what you want to do. The fact that you don't listen to the same music means you guys can talk about different bands and stuff. Maybe you can find a medium? There's more to life than sports and music.

Good luck with whatever you choose.
But it's just weird though. I mean, when we met up last Wednesday, we hardly spoke at all. Sure I talked about holidays, family and school, but that was about it. No general talking at all.

I think I just need a little time to think about it.

[Tyler Revolution]

But it's just weird though. I mean, when we met up last Wednesday, we hardly spoke at all. Sure I talked about holidays, family and school, but that was about it. No general talking at all.

I think I just need a little time to think about it.


But what did you expect it to be like? You haven't talked in how long, so of course it might be awkward. Just give it time, and you'll start to be more comfortable around each other.

[blink182tomchik]

So at the moment I am in a bit of a pickle. Here's the short story;

My dad split up with my mum ages ago, and got married last year. I didn't feel that close to him now he had a new family, so we stopped talking in February. I was pretty depressed about that, but this month he contacted me and asked to meet up. So we did, shot some pool and got some lunch. Everything is mmmkay again, right?

But I'm having doubts about it. At pool, he didn't seem to put that much effort into talk, and to be honest, neither did I. We don't have that much in common either (He is more into rock and indie, I like pop punk and emo, he is very into football and stuff, I am not so into it). And I am just starting my A-Levels at school and he has a new family and friends to look after.

So I have no idea what to do. Should I continue to see him, pretending to want to be there, or should I tell him that I think it's best if we don't see each other?

Wow I clicked on this because it's the title of a Blink-182 song (lol) but that is pretty sad. Do you want to still have contact with him? If you don't care and he doesn't seem to, then myabe it's not worth the effort...

[Tyler Revolution]

Wow I clicked on this because it's the title of a Blink-182 song (lol) but that is pretty sad. Do you want to still have contact with him? If you don't care and he doesn't seem to, then myabe it's not worth the effort...


Did anyone else notice this post?? Praise the Lord, you finally learned how to type and use good grammar. Good work.

[blink182tomchik]

Sounds to me like you're in desperate need of Dr. Phil. Check out his book "Family First"
LOL

[_astheruinfalls]

But it's just weird though. I mean, when we met up last Wednesday, we hardly spoke at all. Sure I talked about holidays, family and school, but that was about it. No general talking at all.

I think I just need a little time to think about it.
Yeah. It's always a little weird. I remember back whenever when I was trying to start a relationship up with my sperm donor, and I hadn't seen him for over 7 years. It was very awkward. But if you want it enough, it can work.

Just take some time and think about it. Do you want a relationship with him? Think of the pros and cons. Is he a good guy? Just stuff like that. But make sure it's what YOU want. Don't listen to your mom, dad, uncle, sister, whatever. Make it your decision.

[_astheruinfalls]

Dr. Phil is a fat fucking bitch in a man's body. I hate that guy.

And I hate tomchickbitchfuck.

[Kif]

I met him 3 days ago and shot some more pool (Oh, I'd like to say that the first time I saw him pool was full so we had to play snooker which is a crapass boring game which ruined the mood anyway) and it was better.

We had a lot more to talk about this time, because it wasn't so awkward. We ended up playing longer than we said we would and chatting about a lot more stuff. Plus I beat him a few times at 9 ball :D

So yeah, it looks like it's getting better. I think before I was just a little unsure about it because it was so awkward, but now it isn't so bad.

[Tyler Revolution]

I met him 3 days ago and shot some more pool (Oh, I'd like to say that the first time I saw him pool was full so we had to play snooker which is a crapass boring game which ruined the mood anyway) and it was better.

We had a lot more to talk about this time, because it wasn't so awkward. We ended up playing longer than we said we would and chatting about a lot more stuff. Plus I beat him a few times at 9 ball :D

So yeah, it looks like it's getting better. I think before I was just a little unsure about it because it was so awkward, but now it isn't so bad.


See, there you go. Just give it some time and things will be fine. That's cool that it's getting better. Congrats, and good luck.