Tell me if these suck

[IamNogreatMan]

Come on
Well come on girls tell me why
you all have that gun to my head
with the same sinister smirk plastered all over those pretty faces
pretty gilrs, seem so calculating
now watch me dance
as my head rolls off my shoulders you all laugh as i shake about (shake shake is whats its all about)
i have no coice, watch as i drink blood ( but i swear i'm not a vampire )
pretty girls seem so calculation
and pretty girls just want to make me hurt
quite parts, just make it last longer
and longer still, i live for you

well come on and tell me why
i'm not alive (i swear to you I'm not, ignore my blood pumping)
let me take you, and hang you upon my white wall
i'll let your freinds come by and take pictures of your body( cause your so pretty)
then frame them all on my wall
pretty gilrs seem so calculating
pretty gilrs ive won this round
pretty gilrs you have no chance now
i kill pretty girls
pretty girls they say
i cant stop loving you
pretty girls
you know how much i hate you
pretty girls
now i kill pretty girl.
_______________________________
My life is not a tradgey
your heart is just a set of simple words to me
let me lie to you
and as you choke and die, listen closly
i hope you see the joy in my eyes
come girls, lie to me now
i dare you, cause i can do more harm
tradgey i lied, this is my dream (i giggle as i sing)
listen as i sing these words
i sing them in a fashion of i want forget or forgive
i am a fool

and girl so you know, your life doesnt end here
smear your lips on his, i already know
i ask you to tell the truth
but you wont let go
just so you know, i know
but you dont know that truth
well now you do so stop lying to me (you dont want to hurt me)

and i know, this song needs help
i just couldnt fine a way to let it out
so i picked bad words and combined them to make it worse
but here at the end, let me tel you plain and true
i know the truth _______, even before we talked
and i want you to know, the way i am now, it isn't because of you
___________________________________ _______________________
i'll cut off my shadow
and walk alone in the dark
you'lll watch as i sacrafice my heart
this thing is useless, i dont want it anymore
will you come to me when all is done

theres sixteen angels drinking my blood
there all wondering where ive gone

we fell like, this is everythign we wanted
and we fell like, dying is enough
let me breath down your throat as you chase it with blood
I didnt know it would hurt this bad
and sorry isnt enough

tonight i will have your life in my hands
as i dream, i dont know the end

this has been building (every word you said) for such a long time (every thing i did)
this hate of yours and this love of mine (is leaving enough)
coming together and splitting apart
i can help but to wonder where you are

wondering where ive gone, falling out of my chest
drinking my blood

we feel like, dying is enough (its everything we wanted)
they ask us, is drying enough
consumed by sickness, i feel so cold

sixteen angels swimming in my blood

laughing and smiling, laughing and smiling
there all

will you come to me, when all is done.
___________________________________ __
i took a trip to town, i wanted to share what i had found
a picture, a poem, a thing, a letter. that i hoped would turn out better
as the towns people gathered around the begged me to say so many things

will you give us a dollar
will you tell us a tale
can you combine them both so we dont goto hell
will you sing us a song
no, no to everything

so ive packed my things and left that place to head out into the wilderness
just to be alone
but to my surprise what did i find
a group, some people, sitting around a fire
they asked me to come over

will you give us a dollar
will you tell us a tale
can you combine them both so we dont goto hell
will you sing us a song
and will you come back when the end is finally done

no i wont give you a dollar, go and earn one your self
my tale is already told, go and read it somewhere else
if i wont give you one or the other, what makes you think i'll give you both
and you say you want my songs, well you're going to have to beg or choke
___________________________________ ______________


Give me praise or tear me apart. But do something.

[IamNogreatMan]

Anyone?

[TheNumberOneFan]

I'm not one to tear apart. This stuff rocks. Play any instuments? or sing? you got some talent dude...

definitely.. you need a band.

i'd love to see more of your work! email me Porsche56s@mac.com all your material... i love to critique!! (in detail)

[IamNogreatMan]

Hey thanks man. I play guitar and i mess around with the bass and what not. Ive been trying to get a band together for about 3 years, but living in a town such as abilene texas..its just about impossable. So, right now I've just been doing the me and a guitar thing.

[Hilikus]

hmm i like them they are really good.

Teh first song is damn creepy but its good nonetheless. (is that one word?)

[IamNogreatMan]

Thank you. Just a fact, i like the third one the best.

[try_pie]

:magicman:

gj

[IamNogreatMan]

Thats ethier glassjaw, good job, or something else i can't think of. I am going to vote good job, and say thank you.

[Greg]

dont take any real offense cause im no great writer either... but all of those songs seem like something you'd hear from every other BS screamo wanna be band. at least like all the crappy bands around here. this sort of thing is why i have so much trouble writing. i could write like that but i dotn want to. i want it to be somethign new and refreshing or at least original. its hard... ill start something and be like... what the fuck? this could be cute without the e part 2. and i just stop writing. cause all this shits being repeated... it needs to end somewhere

[TheInBetween 0]

altho i agree with greg, that its like a lot of other bands, and that its hard to write something unlike that type of stuff. i like it, youre a pretty talented writer.

[IamNogreatMan]

Thank you again for the comments.

I once tired to write about something else. But it didnt work. So alas.

[the_bmoc]

altho i agree with greg, that its like a lot of other bands, and that its hard to write something unlike that type of stuff. i like it, youre a pretty talented writer.

Are you fucking serious? I respect everyones artistic ability, but saying that its hard to write something unlike that is fucking ridiculous. There were lyrics and music before EMO and it will still be here when its done. You go down in the books for number one jackass comment of the year.

[MaybeOneDay]

Are you fucking serious? I respect everyones artistic ability, but saying that its hard to write something unlike that is fucking ridiculous. There were lyrics and music before EMO and it will still be here when its done. You go down in the books for number one jackass comment of the year.
Agreed.

You can write anything you want to write. One type of lyrics are no harder to write than another type.

[kimosabe]

RANDOM SMILEY POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:vivi9: