Best song ever written, tell me I am right.

[IamNogreatMan]

Ok, thats not true. But, it got you to click it.

Anyway, i wanted to write a song and get feedback on it, so i will spend the next 5min writting a song.
(start song)

Hello everyone, i am here to explain why i have blood on my hands

Everything starts with a kiss
Tell it all ends with us slitting our wrist

But how oh so cliche
"You broke my heart"
"So i punched out yours"
My girl, what could be more common than to say everything we want
and follow it up by hiding everything were not

But alas, our hero has almost run his course
Killing few and wounding many
the cliched narrative of his life screams
"this is all your faulr"

Tell me something new
And give me everything, everything but the answers
It wont end today

I buried your body (to bad i couldnt stop laughing)
You and your endless twitching
So i shut door to death ( your twitching just makes me laugh harder)

And look now, he is on his last stand
four thoulsand to one
"bring them on"
bring them on, lets bring them on
Tell me something

Tell me something

Legs dont bend that way
arms dont look that way
Hearts dont break that way

[SingleDoubt]

i dunno how it would sound as a song, but i enjoyed reading it

[TheNumberOneFan]

man... i was TOTALLY digging that... i hate reading good lyrics like this when they don't have a song behind them. pisses me off.. makes me want to hear it as a song. Great job, though. Mad kudos.

[IamNogreatMan]

Thanks man.

And people, dont make me write another song to get more comments.

[Withdrawnx3]

i really like it..as i was reading it "i buried your body" quickly reminded me of senses fail but the rest of the song isnt like that..i wish there was a way to hear it because if it was a song it would be really great..good job

[SilencedScreams]

man... i was TOTALLY digging that... i hate reading good lyrics like this when they don't have a song behind them. pisses me off.. makes me want to hear it as a song. Great job, though. Mad kudos.

I feel the same way. Even when I write, I always try to hear it as a song in my head... yeah then I just get frustrated hah. Anyway, I really like the lyrics, awesome job.

[IamNogreatMan]

Thanks guys.
I'm working on recording some acoustic versions of all my songs, its done using garageband though, so not really top notch quality. Oh yeah, and i cant sing, but that wont stop me. I'll post a link to the songs when i get them done.

[Stereo Mike]

"You broke my heart"
"So i punched out yours"

I LOVE that line. Good work.

[xoxjessxox]

yup i definitely like those lyrics.. just wish i could here the actually song

[ABL0W]

I like it... good shit. I enjoyed reading it.

[meh_indeed]

awesome lyrics

[IamNogreatMan]

awesome lyrics
Thanks man.

[ckyromance4]

def. mad talent here
sweet ass song

[SockMonkeyRiot]

"You broke my heart"
"So i punched out yours"

I LOVE that line. Good work.

I think it would sound better if it was

"You broke my heart"
"So I punched yours out"

[Stereo Mike]

Yeh, i guess it would.

[infinite]

no offense but this sounds a bit cliche for me.

[IamNogreatMan]

no offense but this sounds a bit cliche for me.
None taken.

I know its cliched, and thats why i make so many references to that in the song. Like I'm trying to fool myself but i dont.

[.:Autopilot:.]

I feel the same way. Even when I write, I always try to hear it as a song in my head... yeah then I just get frustrated hah. Anyway, I really like the lyrics, awesome job.
I do that too... :p

[nightjarWI]

It would be very interesting to hear the song that goes into. It's very different. That isn't a bad thing.

[updownleftright]

Legs dont bend that way
arms dont look that way
Hearts dont break that way
__________________

I like those alot. nice job.