untitled, check it out if yr bored.

[beau blood rush]

let's hear it for headaches
'cause i am deaf on pills
so drop a wink to my debut blues
I'm puppet strung in love with my own doubts
born black belt,
yet to master myself

we're well bred dead ends
'Vos amo speculum.'
so spill that smile in my reflection
i'll tread foot on a shallow trend

so take a bow,
or take me down
cause poets get off on a gossip mouth
and i don't care what you think
as long as it's about me
as long as it's about me
me
me
me


i got a work ethic,
like desperate tragedy
while crowds are won and lost
roses always run through my veins
so encore, encore
bury me in applause

we're well bred dead ends
'Vos amo speculum.'
so spill that smile in my reflection
i'll tread foot on a shallow trend

so take a bow,
or take me down
cause poets get off on a gossip mouth
and i don't care what you think
as long as it's about me
as long as it's about me
me
me
me


*EDIT

this is the new chorus, i took the line "i don't care what you think, as long as it's about me"
from something pete wentz says on the CFOB mixtape
i just realised ther first single "i dont care" will most likely have that line in it
so this is the new chorus:


so take a bow,
or take me down
cause poets get off on a gossip mouth
and you won't, won't, won't know anything
except i'm only ever missing me
me
me
me

[beau blood rush]

lucky i changed it haha

[lew_1987]

There are certain bits I like, but poems in this style can sometimes make me cringe. Like the line 'Roses always run through my veins'.

[beau blood rush]

cheers for the crit man, what about it makes you cringe?
i love your default.

[adifferentmess]

love it. kinda reminds me of brand new.

[beau blood rush]

awesome i've never heard that before,
it definitely won't sound like brand new

[lew_1987]

cheers for the crit man, what about it makes you cringe?
i love your default.

Haha thanks.

To me, it's like you're using the most cheesy subject matter, and sometimes you just can't cover that up. Although you write a lot better then most, it still doesn't cover up the sentiments you're trying to promote. I'm finding it a bit hard to explain so this probably doesn't make much sense, haha.

[beau blood rush]

no that makes so much sense, just to make sure we're both on the same track
what did you think the subject matter was?

[lew_1987]

I take it it's about someone who is really good with women, and this is about how it affects him.

[beau blood rush]

nah its about overcoming your own shortcomings through confidence
a "fuck you" to everyone who puts you down

songs about women are pretty dead
not that i can say the growing trend of songs written about "myself"
are any better, but that's what i tend to write about

[lew_1987]

Haha, my meaning was quite different from yours, but similar in some way too. That's what can be good about some pieces though, if theres not one meaning to the piece. That way people can create their own meaning and identify with it better.

[tait]

haha that avatar made me laugh

[beau blood rush]

yr avatar makes me laugh!

[chistianna.]

i like the changed chorus soo much better.

[lew_1987]

Let's all laugh at everyone's avatars, like this:

Hahahahahaha.

[adifferentmess]

have you got music to it yet? or is it just lyrics atm?

[beau blood rush]

we've started
we're finishing it off Thursday, then hopefully recording it
thanks christina for the compliment on the chorus change.
i'm unhappy with the pre chorus so i'll fix that up tonite