Ultimate Warrior? Ultimate Comedy!

[Trainsaw]

Alright for any of you who watched wrestling as a child or even knows of this guy, he's a washed up professional wrestler turned ultra conservative. Well awhile back he gave a speech at UCONN and decided to share his views with the people he was speaking to, this included throwing around the word *****s and towel heads. So catching wind of this somethingawful.com gave the warriors website the "awful link of the day" calling him a racist. Well the Warrior (or his "Director of Communications") caught wind of this and decided to engage in a game of email tag with Lowtax, the guy who runs Somethingawful.com, then Lowtax posted it on the website and this is fucking comedy gold.
Ultimate Warriors' Director of Communications v.s. Something Awful.com in a hardcore email match, winner takes all (http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=2790)

The "Director of Communications" for the warrior is fucking crazy about the 3rd or 4th email he starts showing off his Detective skills and how he can find out anything about anyone he wants!

[Stereo Mike]

Alright for any of you who watched wrestling as a child or even knows of this guy, he's a washed up professional wrestler turned ultra conservative. Well awhile back he gave a speech at UCONN and decided to share his views with the people he was speaking to, this included throwing around the word *****s and towel heads. So catching wind of this somethingawful.com gave the warriors website the "awful link of the day" calling him a racist. Well the Warrior (or his "Director of Communications") caught wind of this and decided to engage in a game of email tag with Lowtax, the guy who runs Somethingawful.com, then Lowtax posted it on the website and this is fucking comedy gold.
Ultimate Warriors' Director of Communications v.s. Something Awful.com in a hardcore email match, winner takes all (http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=2790)

The "Director of Communications" for the warrior is fucking crazy about the 3rd or 4th email he starts showing off his Detective skills and how he can find out anything about anyone he wants!
WOAH! i fucking loved that guy. One of my all time favourite wrestlers.

[Trainsaw]

Yeah, well he's a fucking asshat now. He needs to steal more 5 year old girls bike streamers to tie around his arms and be cool again

[Stereo Mike]

Yeah, well he's a fucking asshat now. He needs to steal more 5 year old girls bike streamers to tie around his arms and be cool again
haha, those streamers were one of the main reasons i loved him.

[Trainsaw]

here's a recent picture of him http://www.collegehumor.com/?image_id=126494

[Stereo Mike]

here's a recent picture of him http://www.collegehumor.com/?image_id=126494
wow.

[allelish]

hahaha

I used to love the warrior more than life itself

[Trainsaw]

I've got a torrent of the speech and this guy is really fucking nuts his highlights include "*****ing doesn't make the world work.." when asked if Homosexuality was as legitimate Heterosexuality, also claiming Kwanza isn't as legitimate as Christmas.

[Jra1]

he was no Legion of Doom.... i bet theyre eating children as we speak

[allelish]

hawk is dead

or animal, one of them is though

[Trainsaw]

One of them is dead, i think hawk

[Stereo Mike]

One of them is dead, i think hawk
yeah, it was hawk.

[Jra1]

aww man. how could i not hear about this?

bet it was a manly death!

[Trainsaw]

They're all dieing, Big Boss Man, Mr. Perfect, Rick Rude, Miss Elizabeth, and then Brother Bruti (Aka Brutus The Barber Beefcake) got picked up while working in a subway trying to buy cocaine or with cocaine, and then Jake the Snake lost his rights to own a snake, and KoKo B. Ware's bird died in a fire!

[Stereo Mike]

aww man. how could i not hear about this?

bet it was a manly death!
haha, it was in his sleep.

[Jra1]

haha, it was in his sleep.

theres no hope left for me then, if even he can't maintain a solid reputation and character, why should i even try? :(

[allelish]

aww man. how could i not hear about this?

bet it was a manly death!
Hahaha definetely, he probably dies from suffocating in his muscle whilst letting off a manly "ROAR!"

Is Brutus still alive, trainsaw?

Also, is it true that miss Elizabeth was murdered by Lex Luger?

[Trainsaw]

No he died and was reincarnated as the Big Booty Man ala WCW

[Stereo Mike]

Ric Flair should, by all rights, be dead. He looks like a melting wax work nowadays.


WCW was the shit!

[Trainsaw]

As for Miss Liz i read somewhere that they were mixing pills w/ alcohol?? I think, it was on some news site, but for real read the link its fucking hilarious

[shane hennessey]

didnt he die of a drug overdose about 15 years ago?

[Jra1]

Ric Flair should, by all rights, be dead. He looks like a melting wax work nowadays.


WCW was the shit!

i was just about to post that haha.
he's a shell of his former self... and lets face facts he was no Randy Savage even in his prime.

[allelish]

Oooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh hh Yyyyeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!! !

[Stereo Mike]

i was just about to post that haha.
he's a shell of his former self... and lets face facts he was no Randy Savage even in his prime.
haha, i never found him a good wrestler either. he bored the hell out of me with that whole 'woo!' slap shit. as if that would fucking hurt.

Randy Savage? OH YEAH!!!!!

Oooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh hh Yyyyeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!! !
dammit.

[Jra1]

Macho man was the greatest thing to ever come out of wrestling , no competition in my opinion...
Ultimate Warrior, Macho Man, Hogan, LoD, Milliondollar man and Lex Lugar... those were the days, none of that cheap story line shit, just pure sweaty-man-action!

EDIT: how could i forget Razor Ramone!! (Scott Hall) - the tooth-pick!

[last light]

haha, i never found him a good wrestler either. he bored the hell out of me with that whole 'woo!' slap shit. as if that would fucking hurt.

Randy Savage? OH YEAH!!!!!


dammit.

plus he has horrendous man tits.

[Jra1]

plus he has horrendous man tits.

recently he's looking more and more like a soho-ponce.... he only barely falls short of sucking HHH off in the ring

[Stereo Mike]

Macho man was the greatest thing to ever come out of wrestling , no competition in my opinion...
Ultimate Warrior, Macho Man, Hogan, LoD, Milliondollar man and Lex Lugar... those were the days, none of that cheap story line shit, just pure sweaty-man-action!

EDIT: how could i forget Razor Ramone!! - the tooth-pick!
Haha, Razor Ramone.... NWO was my favourite era of wrestling. Wolfpac Fo' Life.

Don't turn your back on the wolfpack... or ya might wind up in a body bag.

[Trainsaw]

"APRIL 15th IS COMING UP YOU LOW LIFE PEICES OF CRAP?! HAVE YOU PAID YOUR TAXES!"

- Irwin R. Schyster

[Stereo Mike]

"APRIL 15th IS COMING UP YOU LOW LIFE PEICES OF CRAP?! HAVE YOU PAID YOUR TAXES!"

- Irwin R. Schyster
Schyster... haha.

[Jra1]

Haha, Razor Ramone.... NWO was my favourite era of wrestling. Wolfpac Fo' Life.

Don't turn your back on the wolfpack... or ya might wind up in a body bag.

haha, i have to spread reputation before givin to you again tho Hurley :(

[Stereo Mike]

No probs mate. I'll hook you up.

[Jra1]

ill return the favour when i can

anyway, back to the topic, any1 remember Golddust?... talking about Ric Flairs manboobs reminded me of the single most homoerotic thing to ever come out of wrestling (and thats a big accomplishment...)

[allelish]

Remember on the house shows the established wrestlers would just face trainees and crush them. Until the 1-2-3 kid (x-pac) came along and beat Razor Ramone! Phenomenal.

Also, who remembers tatonka?

SHATTERED DREAMS!!!!! What a move! Golddust was too weird for me. His entrance theme was awesome though.

[Jra1]

i loved the 1-2-3 kid...miles better than the x-pac character he played in my opinion.
always loved the high-flyers, most entertaining to watch

[Stereo Mike]

Remember on the house shows the established wrestlers would just face trainees and crush them. Until the 1-2-3 kid (x-pac) came along and beat Razor Ramone! Phenomenal.

Also, who remembers tatonka?

http://www.derok.net/derek3/images/classics/wwf%20tatanka.jpg
legend.

[marrost]

I stand by the statement that the best WWF angle of all time is when Big Show's dad died of cancer. It all came to the best moment in wrestling history when the Bossman showed up at the funeral and attached the coffin to his squad car and pulled it away while the Big Show jumped on top for about 2 seconds before rolling off.

[allelish]

http://www.derok.net/derek3/images/classics/wwf%20tatanka.jpg
legend.
HOLY SHIT! That is the best thing ever!

[Stereo Mike]

HOLY SHIT! That is the best thing ever!
haha, this is officially my favourite thread.

[allelish]

I stand by the statement that the best WWF angle of all time is when Big Show's dad died of cancer. It all came to the best moment in wrestling history when the Bossman showed up at the funeral and attached the coffin to his squad car and pulled it away while the Big Show jumped on top for about 2 seconds before rolling off.
hahaha yeah, that was outrageous.

[BrandNew20]

uh, those emails were pretty funny.

[Stereo Mike]

One of my favourite displays of strength was when Goldberg jackhammered the Big Show in WCW. He had him hanging in the air vertical for like 4 seconds. It was AWESOME.

[Jra1]

i never was a fan of the Big Bossman... was really boring, especially considering he was about in the best times of wrestling

EDIT: recently, Big Show flipped over a van... that was pretty impressive, although he then lost in a sumo match haha

[Trainsaw]

uh, those emails were pretty funny.

This one killed me "My dad actually called me last night to say "some crazy guy phoned the house here. He called me a 'candy ass' and then hung up." I replied to him, "oh yeah, that's this guy representing the Ultimate Warrior. He pretty much has an airtight legal case against us, which is why he's spending his Sunday night calling you, my father." My dad doesn't understand the Internet as well as I do."

[marrost]

http://www.141empire.com/141prime/BOSSMAN3RD.htm

[FinchBulldog2]

hahaha

I used to love the warrior more than life itself
same...it was amazing when he beat the Hulk

[Stereo Mike]

http://www.141empire.com/141prime/BOSSMAN3RD.htm
But the Bossman won in our four-man staff vote 8-2 (I get seven votes because I own, run, and design this site).
haha.

[Trainsaw]

KoKo B. Ware was where its at

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/h/highenergy/02.jpg

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/h/highenergy/01.jpg

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/k/kokobware/03.jpg

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/k/kokobware/01.jpg

[Stereo Mike]

KoKo B. Ware was where its at

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/h/highenergy/02.jpg

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/h/highenergy/01.jpg

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/k/kokobware/03.jpg

http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com/pictures/k/kokobware/01.jpg
Respect.

[BrandNew20]

This one killed me "My dad actually called me last night to say "some crazy guy phoned the house here. He called me a 'candy ass' and then hung up." I replied to him, "oh yeah, that's this guy representing the Ultimate Warrior. He pretty much has an airtight legal case against us, which is why he's spending his Sunday night calling you, my father." My dad doesn't understand the Internet as well as I do."

yeah, that was awesome. I loved when he said that he was going to call him "Peaches" from now on.

[Trainsaw]

Yeah that's crazy, you know the warrior was going nuts when the whole thing went down

[FrancesTheMute]

Also, from now on, I shall refer to you as "Peaches."