View Full Version : Love-SOS? Gahh..
jules_x
11/30/08, 09:20 AM
So.. my bf broke it to me last night; he's not sure if he loves me as much as I love him (etc), and he said the special "it" that was between us before, isn't quite as present anymore.
Any tips how I can fix this? Don't tell me "just break up", cause it really is not that simple. I reallyreallyreally need/want him in my life/love him.
He gave me another chance (don't know for how long), to fix it.
But I don't know how.
I'd appreciate all the help I can get.
dontsneeze
11/30/08, 09:23 AM
give him some space. don't spend all your time obsessing over him. do some stuff for yourself.
jules_x
11/30/08, 09:27 AM
give him some space. don't spend all your time obsessing over him. do some stuff for yourself.
Yeeea, you might be on to something there. I've been living in his apartment (not quite, but as good as) for the last two months.
But how to bring back the "it"?
dontsneeze
11/30/08, 09:34 AM
i doubt there is anything you can do that will directly bring back the "it."
stop obsessing over him/your relationship. focus on school/work/bettering yourself. work out or something. find something you can do that doesn't involve him.
when you stop dwelling on it, the "it" will return.
Kassie09
11/30/08, 09:54 AM
he gave you time for just you to fix it? I think you both need to work on things..not just you.
brentkid
11/30/08, 10:01 AM
he gave you time for just you to fix it? I think you both need to work on things..not just you.
This.
Relationships are between two people. That lack of connection is not just your fault.
jules_x
11/30/08, 10:15 AM
he gave you time for just you to fix it? I think you both need to work on things..not just you.
No, I don't think it's -just- me, but what can he do? And really, how can I make him do it?
Naa, I just think it's easier for me to find out what I can do.
But yea.
It is between two people.. I'm just trying to figure it out..
Kassie09
11/30/08, 10:22 AM
No, I don't think it's -just- me, but what can he do? And really, how can I make him do it?
Naa, I just think it's easier for me to find out what I can do.
But yea.
It is between two people.. I'm just trying to figure it out..
Have you guys tried really talking about it? If not, sit down and just both discuss and evaluate everything, he can say his reasons for what you do that he thinks it wont work and you can do the same. Then, if you both want it to work out, you guys can try to change a little bit and try it out. But honestly..you both have to really really want it..and it kind of sounds like he doesn't. I hope you can get it to work out though..but you guys really need to talk, a lot.
jules_x
11/30/08, 10:28 AM
Have you guys tried really talking about it? If not, sit down and just both discuss and evaluate everything, he can say his reasons for what you do that he thinks it wont work and you can do the same. Then, if you both want it to work out, you guys can try to change a little bit and try it out. But honestly..you both have to really really want it..and it kind of sounds like he doesn't. I hope you can get it to work out though..but you guys really need to talk, a lot.
Well, we did talk last night, for like two hours or so..
He acted pretty normal today.
But yeah, he said he didn't think he loved me as much as I love him, or like. I love him too much, ehr. Something like that. Makes me go insaaaaaaaaaaaane.
And you're right.
We really should talk about it. More than we have.
Does it count that he sorta cried too? Like, it sort of does matter, doesn't it?
I sobbed a lot.
Maybe I should give him space enough to miss me.
Kassie09
11/30/08, 10:32 AM
Well, we did talk last night, for like two hours or so..
He acted pretty normal today.
But yeah, he said he didn't think he loved me as much as I love him, or like. I love him too much, ehr. Something like that. Makes me go insaaaaaaaaaaaane.
And you're right.
We really should talk about it. More than we have.
Does it count that he sorta cried too? Like, it sort of does matter, doesn't it?
I sobbed a lot.
Maybe I should give him space enough to miss me.
Him saying you love him more than he loves you isn't good but the fact that he cries shows he does care and the fact that he wasn't like 'lets end this now, no second chances' is also good. I mean..it seems like he does care about you still.
Taking a small break is always an option for both of you to clear your heads..but those don't work for everyone..so not sure if that'd be a good idea or not.
cheezwhiz
11/30/08, 10:33 AM
I think that maybe you need to give yourself some space, take a couple steps back from the relationship. Hang out with some friends, make some new ones. As far as bringing back the "it", from what you said it seems like he just wants some space and for you to calm down a little.
jules_x
11/30/08, 10:34 AM
Him saying you love him more than he loves you isn't good but the fact that he cries shows he does care and the fact that he wasn't like 'lets end this now, no second chances' is also good. I mean..it seems like he does care about you still.
Taking a small break is always an option for both of you to clear your heads..but those don't work for everyone..so not sure if that'd be a good idea or not.
Hmm.
Week-long-vacation ?
(going on one in a week-and-a-half)
DaveZeroZero
11/30/08, 10:40 AM
So.. my bf broke it to me last night; he's not sure if he loves me as much as I love him (etc), and he said the special "it" that was between us before, isn't quite as present anymore.
Any tips how I can fix this? Don't tell me "just break up", cause it really is not that simple. I reallyreallyreally need/want him in my life/love him.
He gave me another chance (don't know for how long), to fix it.
But I don't know how.
I'd appreciate all the help I can get.
wasn't he cheating on you anyway?
Kassie09
11/30/08, 10:42 AM
Hmm.
Week-long-vacation ?
(going on one in a week-and-a-half)
That would probably be good. That way you can both see what it's like without each other and go from there.
jules_x
11/30/08, 10:47 AM
wasn't he cheating on you anyway?
Talked about it.
Nope. He slept in the same bed as his ex, and nothing more. Sooo.
DaveZeroZero
11/30/08, 10:49 AM
Talked about it.
Nope. He slept in the same bed as his ex, and nothing more. Sooo.
Then why did you make all of those angry threads about it before?
jules_x
11/30/08, 10:54 AM
Then why did you make all of those angry threads about it before?
Because I thought he was goooing to cheat.
Then the bitch got fat, mohahaha
DaveZeroZero
11/30/08, 10:57 AM
Because I thought he was goooing to cheat.
Then the bitch got fat, mohahaha
Maybe she's pregnant with his kid.
jules_x
11/30/08, 10:59 AM
Maybe she's pregnant with his kid.
Funny, Dave. :p
DaveZeroZero
11/30/08, 11:01 AM
Funny, Dave. :p
As always :-)
jagermeister
11/30/08, 11:25 AM
So.. my bf broke it to me last night; he's not sure if he loves me as much as I love him (etc), and he said the special "it" that was between us before, isn't quite as present anymore.
Any tips how I can fix this? Don't tell me "just break up", cause it really is not that simple. I reallyreallyreally need/want him in my life/love him.
He gave me another chance (don't know for how long), to fix it.
But I don't know how.
I'd appreciate all the help I can get.
GIve up on it. In the end, this will all be a waste of your time.
thesafeword
11/30/08, 11:41 AM
Give him sex.
SomedayTheFire
11/30/08, 02:18 PM
You will get over him, trust me you will. The next month may be bad but you will get over him.
alltimehoe93
11/30/08, 02:22 PM
No, I don't think it's -just- me, but what can he do? And really, how can I make him do it?
Naa, I just think it's easier for me to find out what I can do.
But yea.
It is between two people.. I'm just trying to figure it out..
I think that if he really wants to make it work, he'll realize that it's not just all on you and that he needs to give you some space as well.
Both of you just need to spend time apart and if you both realize that you feel the same way after some time, then talk it through.
I'm kind of just taking a shot in the dark here though.
you cant force someone to love you..if its not there, then its not there. And don't be one of those crazy/obsessive girls. Trust me, as time goes by you'll get over him.
you cant force someone to love you
Maybe so, but blowjobs, baked cookies, and, of course, anal are a good start.
jules_x
12/01/08, 06:11 AM
Space, yes.
But I'm not giving it up. After all, he gave us another chance.
ReadyForAction
12/02/08, 12:27 PM
The fact that he "gave" you another chance means that you should probably give him space because he obviously doesnt appreciate you
also
you never NEED someone in your life, that kind of thinking creates an unhealthy dependency on him for your happiness, which is a really bad idea
morgan_w
12/02/08, 01:13 PM
Like other people have said, give him some space...if he realizes the same about you...then he'll come back :)
theguilt engine
12/02/08, 03:49 PM
So.. my bf broke it to me last night; he's not sure if he loves me as much as I love him (etc), and he said the special "it" that was between us before, isn't quite as present anymore.
Any tips how I can fix this? Don't tell me "just break up", cause it really is not that simple. I reallyreallyreally need/want him in my life/love him.
He gave me another chance (don't know for how long), to fix it.
But I don't know how.
I'd appreciate all the help I can get.
just be straight foreward...works every time.
jules_x
12/03/08, 08:56 AM
just be straight foreward...works every time.
what kind of straight forewardness were you thinking about?
jules_x
12/03/08, 08:56 AM
fuck his best friend.
Haha. Dude, if you knew how they looked like, you'd never say that. XD
DaveZeroZero
12/03/08, 09:00 AM
Haha. Dude, if you knew how they looked like, you'd never say that. XD
He's Norwegian, he must be good looking.
HangsLikeHeaven
12/03/08, 09:19 AM
Like the majority says, give one another space and see what happens.
jules_x
12/03/08, 10:45 AM
He's Norwegian, he must be good looking.
Ofc, he is. His bestfriend just isn't.
Unless you're into fisheyes and 300 pound guys.
DaveZeroZero
12/03/08, 11:41 AM
Ofc, he is. His bestfriend just isn't.
Unless you're into fisheyes and 300 pound guys.
he can't be Norwegian.
Haha. Dude, if you knew how they looked like, you'd never say that. XD
cover the face and fuck the base?
jules_x
12/03/08, 01:06 PM
he can't be Norwegian.
I'm pretty sure his bestfriend isn't.
cover the face and fuck the base?
Hahah, ehrermm.. I don't play like that. xD
DaveZeroZero
12/03/08, 01:09 PM
I'm pretty sure his bestfriend isn't.
Hahah, ehrermm.. I don't play like that. xD
Oh, that would make sense.
I'm pretty sure his bestfriend isn't.
Hahah, ehrermm.. I don't play like that. xD
oh wait i know, fuck his dad.
how does his dad look. lol.
jules_x
12/04/08, 06:14 AM
oh wait i know, fuck his dad.
how does his dad look. lol.
Hahahaha, neither his dad or mom is what you'd call dilf/milf. They're too old for my taste. Or, ehm. How old do you like your dilf/milfs?
Angylion Gefell
12/04/08, 11:47 AM
give him anal, the gift that keeps on giving.
holybuble
12/11/08, 09:18 AM
i saw two conversations is one of your fav. album.maybe don't listen it for a while.sad albums when you'r sad are a bit dangerous.
Maybe it's just the winter in Norway,be patient with your bf.
thespearkid
12/11/08, 10:03 AM
The "new and exciting relationship" phase is over. If he leaves you once it ends, it means he doesn't feel anything substantial for you and you're wasting your time by trying to bring back the "it".
DaveZeroZero
12/11/08, 10:20 AM
The "new and exciting relationship" phase is over. If he leaves you once it ends, it means he doesn't feel anything substantial for you and you're wasting your time by trying to bring back the "it".
Did you do that by proposing?
BlueVioletMUM
12/11/08, 02:10 PM
You both need some space....time heals all wounds...if there is anything there on his end he will come back around and if not...the space will do you some good...it will allow you to not worry so much as to whether or not he will come around....trust me I know...my b/f recently went through a few doubts and shut me out for a while....it was hard to deal with but we both got the space we needed and were then able to discuss things better and get it all worked out...not saying the space will get him to fall in love with you again but sounds to me as what ever is meant to happen the space will do you both some good.
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