Mr. Mushroom Cloud

[mercutio7]

Detox
"Tick- tocks"
within a generational time bomb.
Ten bucks a climbaxe
Plus four for war,
Divorce Court Distopia strikes the
Austerity Ward.
I rode a Bullet Bus to Mars and crashed
Calypso like a car
then pieced her abck together into a
jigsaw puzzle of tar.
Chronological command(h)er,
we have dropped anchor at an
anorexial comma within a
sentence of sacrimony
P-E-R-I-O-D
Bulimia bruises are
cocked and ready nooses
sent from the stomach of a nation that
cannot hold it's own liqour.
This is the Atombomb Renaissance;
where the Queen of Psalms
d
r
o
p

Static Bombs into the palms of the unwitting.

[xforestxwaitsx]

:woot: I love it. Another awesome poem.

[kimosabe]

worst piece of crap i have ever read! that entire "Chronological command(h)er" shit is annoying as fuck. Being random does not make you a good poet. Go use a Chainsaw for a dildo, fucker.

[mercutio7]

Just because you can't comprehend it, doesn't mean it's random. Pick something that's "random" and I'll try and help your narrow mind out.

[ArTkY_]

I liked it a lot. Could have done without the command(h)er thing. wtf was that about? I know its your style, but yeah...

[mercutio7]

OKay, this is my style, but anyways, I'll explain. "Chronological Commander, you have dropped anchor at an anorexial comma..." meaning our society pushes girls to be sickly thin , in other words "command her"

[ArTkY_]

OKay, this is my style, but anyways, I'll explain. "Chronological Commander, you have dropped anchor at an anorexial comma..." meaning our society pushes girls to be sickly thin , in other words "command her"
ok...

[mercutio7]

nevermind

[ArTkY_]

nevermind
the ok.. meant i already got it and there was no need to explain.

[IAmCountryMusic]

oh, thats cute

[xforestxwaitsx]

i still think it was really good and chainsaws don't work really well for that. Kimosabe would kow.

[kimosabe]

i still think it was really good and chainsaws don't work really well for that. Kimosabe would kow.
i would 'kow'? you the one saying it wouldn't work....
"OKay, this is my style, but anyways, I'll explain. "Chronological Commander, you have dropped anchor at an anorexial comma..." meaning our society pushes girls to be sickly thin , in other words "command her"
I get what you are trying to say, but why not just fucking say it? the phrasing just makes it sounds like pretensious shit. "dropped anchor at an anorexial comma"? that line sucks more than your mom on speed.

[xforestxwaitsx]

I get what you are trying to say, but why not just fucking say it? the phrasing just makes it sounds like pretensious shit. "dropped anchor at an anorexial comma"? that line sucks more than your mom on speed.[/QUOTE]

or you

[kimosabe]

I get what you are trying to say, but why not just fucking say it? the phrasing just makes it sounds like pretensious shit. "dropped anchor at an anorexial comma"? that line sucks more than your mom on speed.
or you[/QUOTE]

or like you suck at quoting....

[xforestxwaitsx]

or like you suck at quoting....[/QUOTE]

or like, you suck at insulting people.

[kimosabe]

or like, you suck at insulting people.

this from the fág that three posts up came with the striking retributal of "or you".

[sweethypocrisy]

this from the fág that three posts up came with the striking retributal of "or you".
hahahha.
kimosabe-47239851485029750239475204395704895 784750823
XforestxwaitsX- negative 45378504327589427

[xforestxwaitsx]

hahahha.
kimosabe-47239851485029750239475204395704895 784750823
XforestxwaitsX- negative 45378504327589427

Yeah, you're just as funny as he is. (by the way, he's not funny) I would have to explain wouldn't I? Did dumbing it down make it any easier for you to understand? Let me put it this way. You and all your little stupid ass friends are immature and naive. If the best you can do is make fun of scene points, then get off. At least make arguing worth my time.

[sweethypocrisy]

Yeah, you're just as funny as he is. (by the way, he's not funny) I would have to explain wouldn't I? Did dumbing it down make it any easier for you to understand? Let me put it this way. You and all your little stupid ass friends are immature and naive. If the best you can do is make fun of scene points, then get off. At least make arguing worth my time.
HAHAHAHhAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAH AHAHAHAHAH

ok. you suck. at everything. ever. because no one was talking about scene points, and second, you just gave me negative scene points. HAHAHAH what a hypocritical cunt, no wonder your cousin shot himself.

[xforestxwaitsx]

HAHAHAHhAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAH AHAHAHAHAH

ok. you suck. at everything. ever. because no one was talking about scene points, and second, you just gave me negative scene points. HAHAHAH what a hypocritical cunt, no wonder your cousin shot himself.

yes, because i was five at the time and had nothing to do with the fact that he was in a severe depression and had been planning it for months. don't worry, you suck just as bad. you know, telling me that i'm a failure in life does nothing for your own pitiful state of existence, and you deserved the negative scene points.

[punkpixie]

worst piece of crap i have ever read! that entire "Chronological command(h)er" shit is annoying as fuck. Being random does not make you a good poet. Go use a Chainsaw for a dildo, fucker.

HAHAHAHA

Holy shit, that was funny...

[sweethypocrisy]

yes, because i was five at the time and had nothing to do with the fact that he was in a severe depression and had been planning it for months. don't worry, you suck just as bad. you know, telling me that i'm a failure in life does nothing for your own pitiful state of existence, and you deserved the negative scene points.
he saw into the future and saw what you would become.

[apoemtothedead]

yes, because i was five at the time and had nothing to do with the fact that he was in a severe depression and had been planning it for months. don't worry, you suck just as bad. you know, telling me that i'm a failure in life does nothing for your own pitiful state of existence, and you deserved the negative scene points.
I hate you and your dead cousin.

[IAmCountryMusic]

I hate you and your dead cousin.
my cousin shot himself too after he came back from the navy because his girlfriend didnt love him.
he looks like justin pierre from motion city soundtrack, but with short hair.

[apoemtothedead]

my cousin shot himself too after he came back from the navy because his girlfriend didnt love him.
he looks like justin pierre from motion city soundtrack, but with short hair.
cool story. Tell it again.

[ArTkY_]

This guy posts good stuff most of the time, and we get on his ass for one of the few times he posts a bad poem...

[IAmCountryMusic]

cool story. Tell it again.
nah, empathy is awesome

[takingback98]

OKay, this is my style, but anyways, I'll explain. "Chronological Commander, you have dropped anchor at an anorexial comma..." meaning our society pushes girls to be sickly thin , in other words "command her"

nicely put

[hopeinlies34]

I liked the poem Merc, I think the command (h)er double entente was creative. I think I understand the concept of the poem, but what was your inspiration for this? (I'd rather understand what you have to say than bash you for trying to be original)