disaster in the making

[heeeeeey]

met a guy in one of my classes and we hit it off really well.

problems:
1. i was initially attracted to him bc he reminds me of a friend i've liked forever (bad news)
2. he's graduating from college in 4 months (no point getting attached)
3. my best friend might like him (obvious)
4. he has a girlfriend (oh. fuck.)
5. his lifestyle involves a lot more drugs and alcohol than mine (eh, not that big a deal)

i put the brakes on the flirting, but should i just abandon the friendship too? we just met, so i'm not that invested now. he's still been very flirty, insisting on lunch together etc. no idea what the status is between him and his girl.

be a bitch and ignore him or be a bitch and homewreck?

[Chris Fallon]

Come on, you're 20 years old. If these problems are still persistent in your life, I assume your social skills must be askew as well.

Go with logic here -- your gut instinct. Doesn't sound to me like he's going to be nominated for "Greatest Man of the Year" anytime soon if he likes you and your best friend, and on top of that, he's got a girlfriend. To me, if a guy is willing to flirt and play coy with other girls, he can't be all that faithful of a person. Sounds like you have this problem solved, you just refuse to face the music ... although the fact you're wondering if you should "homewreck" concerns me. That makes you a bitch -- ignoring him does not.

You're young, there are plenty more guys out there who are better humans and much nicer than this jackass -- be friends with him if you want, sure ... just let him know it's never going further than that.

[stupid__kid]

Come on, you're 20 years old. If these problems are still persistent in your life, I assume your social skills must be askew as well.

Go with logic here -- your gut instinct. Doesn't sound to me like he's going to be nominated for "Greatest Man of the Year" anytime soon if he likes you and your best friend, and on top of that, he's got a girlfriend. To me, if a guy is willing to flirt and play coy with other girls, he can't be all that faithful of a person. Sounds like you have this problem solved, you just refuse to face the music ... although the fact you're wondering if you should "homewreck" concerns me. That makes you a bitch -- ignoring him does not.

You're young, there are plenty more guys out there who are better humans and much nicer than this jackass -- be friends with him if you want, sure ... just let him know it's never going further than that.

:clap:

[SonEric84]

Judging from the title of the thread I think you already know this is a terrible, terrible, idea.


Agree 100% with Chris.

[Hermux-Tantamoq]

Five problems. And plus number four is sticking its foot up your ass anyway.

The height reflects behind the attitude!

[raychull]

Just forget about him, and move on with your life.

[Willy McFurgle]

have him think he's following you into a dark room one night, and when he least expects it, hit the lights and snap pictures of him fuckin the obese janitor.

[fadedmemories]

be a bitch and ignore him or be a bitch and homewreck?
This.

[bigblue2015]

Come on, you're 20 years old. If these problems are still persistent in your life, I assume your social skills must be askew as well.

Go with logic here -- your gut instinct. Doesn't sound to me like he's going to be nominated for "Greatest Man of the Year" anytime soon if he likes you and your best friend, and on top of that, he's got a girlfriend. To me, if a guy is willing to flirt and play coy with other girls, he can't be all that faithful of a person. Sounds like you have this problem solved, you just refuse to face the music ... although the fact you're wondering if you should "homewreck" concerns me. That makes you a bitch -- ignoring him does not.

You're young, there are plenty more guys out there who are better humans and much nicer than this jackass -- be friends with him if you want, sure ... just let him know it's never going further than that.

Probably the best advice I've ever seen on the PL forum.

[heeeeeey]

Come on, you're 20 years old. If these problems are still persistent in your life, I assume your social skills must be askew as well.

Go with logic here -- your gut instinct. Doesn't sound to me like he's going to be nominated for "Greatest Man of the Year" anytime soon if he likes you and your best friend, and on top of that, he's got a girlfriend. To me, if a guy is willing to flirt and play coy with other girls, he can't be all that faithful of a person. Sounds like you have this problem solved, you just refuse to face the music ... although the fact you're wondering if you should "homewreck" concerns me. That makes you a bitch -- ignoring him does not.

You're young, there are plenty more guys out there who are better humans and much nicer than this jackass -- be friends with him if you want, sure ... just let him know it's never going further than that.

what i needed.

i think i just needed a distraction from the guy he reminds me of (who is emotionally unavailable), which is unfair to him (who is romantically unavailable).

i really wasn't going to homewreck, i just needed to phrase it in such a way that i would get called out for my dumbass behavior. so success on that front. thanks!

[thespearkid]

I say homewreck.

[thesafeword]

Have unprotected sex with him.

[|adr3naLine|]

Have unprotected sex with him.

Best case scenario - He likes it a lot and decides to stick around.
Other best case scenario - One of his little buddies slips through the defenses, and 9 months later...your still with him.:-)

This is win win for you.

[robat19]

analalalalalalalallalalalalalalal

[takemyhand]

don't be a homewreck, those are gross.

[thesafeword]

don't be a homewreck, those are gross.
no u

[andrew4045]

go to lunch and then fuck

[thesafeword]

Unprotected fuck you mean.

[samsara]

There should be a poll for this kinda thing.

[fadedmemories]

There should be a poll for this kinda thing.
Haha, true

[secretcrowds.]

get you, your friend, and whoever involved in one big fuck-fest. it will make everything awesome again

[TotalCollapse]

lol

[tasteofchaosgrl]

i think that you should just be friends for now and let him flirt. its possible that him and his gf are having issues and they will be over soon. plus maybe he is staying in the area after he finishes school in a few months.. as for the friend thing... she hasnt called him so you have every right to be interested in him

[heeeeeey]

this is going to be harder than i thought.


(that's what she said)


i'm not sure if it's possible for us to be just friends.

[perceptrons]

this is going to be harder than i thought.


(that's what she said)


i'm not sure if it's possible for us to be just friends.
It is quite possible, you obviously don't want that though.

[takemyhand]

no u

lolwut?

[breaking news!]

You do seem a bit old to be struggling with such juvenile issues.

No one likes bitches, by the way. You should probably avoid being a bitch if you can, you don't want to be known as a bitch or a homewrecker.

[thesafeword]

lolwut?
n00dz?

[takemyhand]

n00dz?

noz but I haz a new peekcha.

but iz cl0thed.

[thesafeword]

noz but I haz a new peekcha.

but iz cl0thed.
What good is that?

[swt_catastrophe]

what i needed.

i think i just needed a distraction from the guy he reminds me of (who is emotionally unavailable), which is unfair to him (who is romantically unavailable).

i really wasn't going to homewreck, i just needed to phrase it in such a way that i would get called out for my dumbass behavior. so success on that front. thanks!

this is going to be harder than i thought.


(that's what she said)


i'm not sure if it's possible for us to be just friends.
Basically, it sounds like you know that you shouldn't be doing this and going after him, but you aren't strong enough to make that decision yourself and/or hold to it. So instead, you want someone else to say you shouldn't, which eliminates part of the responsibility on your part.

[takemyhand]

What good is that?

imagination? lawlllll

[thesafeword]

Fuck imagination.

[heeeeeey]

Basically, it sounds like you know that you shouldn't be doing this and going after him, but you aren't strong enough to make that decision yourself and/or hold to it. So instead, you want someone else to say you shouldn't, which eliminates part of the responsibility on your part.

basically.

i say that it will be hard, not because of my lack of resolve but because of his. (yesterday) when i talked to him less and didn't flirt back, he kept asking what's wrong, are you okay, etc. and now he's just flirting harder and trying to impress me because he thinks i'm trying to play hard to get.

damned if you do, damned if you don't.