Vanity__Dearest
09/13/05, 06:35 AM
http://www.thephatphree.com/features.asp?StoryID=1421&SectionID=1
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/48.gif
Getting your picture taken with a tiger Why?! Seriously, what is the fucking point? Unless you killed it with your bare hands, why? You want a photo of you with a tiger so bad, I have Photoshop- call me. I'll put you in a picture with two tigers and Gary Busey riding a fucking unicorn—whatever you want. I can even airbrush out your deep-set eyes and drool, retard.
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/42.gif
Laughing yourself to death while watching “Mind of Mencia” This show is number two on the list of "comedy" shows with the least number of laughs—worsted only by "The Tonight Show". I'm not sure what it is about being a Latino comic that means you can tell ten-year old jokes and still manage to get a television show. Yeah Carlos, we know. You see the Rolling Stones, and it you think, "doing lots of drugs makes you live longer!" Hilarious! Where do you come up with this stuff.
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/37.gif
Bleeding out following an adult circumcision Just let that foreskin flap, homie. You can always tell chicks to “look at what you’ve got under the hood”.
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/16.gif
At a Great White concert Terrible! Simply a terrible way to die! A hundred people died, and they didn’t even get to hear “Once Bitten, Twice Shy”!
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/10.gif
A tragic Bowflex accident The most embarrassing thing about it is that you actually own a Bowflex. Seriously, who shells out two thousand dollars for fake exercise equipment? Lift a fucking weight.
"What do you bench?"
"Dude, I am up to bending four sticks now. I can bend the shit out of those sticks."
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/48.gif
Getting your picture taken with a tiger Why?! Seriously, what is the fucking point? Unless you killed it with your bare hands, why? You want a photo of you with a tiger so bad, I have Photoshop- call me. I'll put you in a picture with two tigers and Gary Busey riding a fucking unicorn—whatever you want. I can even airbrush out your deep-set eyes and drool, retard.
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/42.gif
Laughing yourself to death while watching “Mind of Mencia” This show is number two on the list of "comedy" shows with the least number of laughs—worsted only by "The Tonight Show". I'm not sure what it is about being a Latino comic that means you can tell ten-year old jokes and still manage to get a television show. Yeah Carlos, we know. You see the Rolling Stones, and it you think, "doing lots of drugs makes you live longer!" Hilarious! Where do you come up with this stuff.
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/37.gif
Bleeding out following an adult circumcision Just let that foreskin flap, homie. You can always tell chicks to “look at what you’ve got under the hood”.
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/16.gif
At a Great White concert Terrible! Simply a terrible way to die! A hundred people died, and they didn’t even get to hear “Once Bitten, Twice Shy”!
http://www.thephatphree.com/_photos/50deaths/10.gif
A tragic Bowflex accident The most embarrassing thing about it is that you actually own a Bowflex. Seriously, who shells out two thousand dollars for fake exercise equipment? Lift a fucking weight.
"What do you bench?"
"Dude, I am up to bending four sticks now. I can bend the shit out of those sticks."