mastershake
03/05/09, 08:47 PM
Two Tongues - Two Tongues
Record Label: Vagrant Records
Release Date: February 3, 2009
Threesomes. The average guy (I can’t speak for women, because I don’t, and am not sure if I ever will, understand them) thinks about them quite a lot. From racy stories printed in your Playboys or Maxims to the porn you watch when it’s Saturday night and everyone else has gone out, they always seem so fantastic, mythical even. The thought of it excites you and the knowledge that it’s so hard to come by makes it legendary. You can tell all your friends and be known as the “Threesome guy.” When you have a girlfriend, it’s one of those things that you subtly joke about. But you’re not joking. You just want to gauge her reaction. Then it finally happens. She’s expressing interest! You’re already thinking of all the moves you can pull, making two girls feel ecstasy at once with your superior lovemaking skills. The long, overly detailed stories you will tell your best friends over a beer the next night. It’s all too perfect. It’s finally coming together!
But then it’s never really quite what you expected. What you thought would be a no-holds-barred, sealed DVD experience never quite works out. A bunch of rules come into play. You can’t touch the other girl, your girlfriend will get jealous! No one quite knows exactly what they are doing, how are you supposed to incorporate this new 3rd person? You suggest something you’ve seen or read, and kill the momentum with your disgusting thoughts. There's lots of fumbling around, a smidgen of same sex erotica, and then nothing really. You go to bed unsatisfied, and think of the lie you are going to tell your friends at the bar the next day. Where did it all go wrong? How could pornography lie to you like this? Two fantastic women, you thought it would be so good. You wanted it to be so good.
Kind of like music supergroups really.
When fans heard Max Bemis of Say Anything and Chris Conley of Saves the Day were getting together to make sweet beautiful music, they were invited to the threesome of the year. What could go wrong? Both men have superior musical chops. Both men have interesting vocals and brilliant lyrical ability. In their own bands, their music has paved the way in the scene. Together, they put out a pop rock record, and not a terribly interesting one at that.
"Crawl" is a promising opener. The two voices, though incredibly different, compliment each other well. Conley is at his most nasal on this record, and some may find it grating. However his distinctive yelp contrasts perfectly with Bemis’ deeper growl. Bemis sounds as he always does. He has one of the more unique deliveries in the scene today and it still works in the context of Two Tongues. You will notice immediately that the lyrics don’t reach the height of either band. They contain neither the cutting wit of Bemis, nor the dark poetic imagery of Conley. It’s all standard boy likes girl stuff, and it continues throughout the album.
Musically, the album's not up to scratch either. Of course it’s decent, radio-friendly stuff, not harmful to the ears stuff. It just feels like they could have done so much more based on their pedigree. Some songs have fairly catchy hooks; "Wowee Zowee" is a great cut, obvious single material. The most interesting track is "Back Against the Wall," with its pounding synth complimenting a nice guitar riff. Perhaps if they had tried more stuff like this the album would have been more interesting.
Unfortunately, Two Tongues is not the album everyone wanted it to be. While it has a number of good songs, none ever really reach greatness. What’s worse is that the album has a number of plain, uninspired songs. No, the musical ménage a trois ends up like they all do: lots of fumbling, a little awkward, and wonderment over why it wasn’t what you always imagined it to be.
Say Anything; Saves the Day; Your dreams becoming a not quite lovely reality
myspace.com/twotonguesrock (http://www.myspace.com/twotonguesrock)
Record Label: Vagrant Records
Release Date: February 3, 2009
Threesomes. The average guy (I can’t speak for women, because I don’t, and am not sure if I ever will, understand them) thinks about them quite a lot. From racy stories printed in your Playboys or Maxims to the porn you watch when it’s Saturday night and everyone else has gone out, they always seem so fantastic, mythical even. The thought of it excites you and the knowledge that it’s so hard to come by makes it legendary. You can tell all your friends and be known as the “Threesome guy.” When you have a girlfriend, it’s one of those things that you subtly joke about. But you’re not joking. You just want to gauge her reaction. Then it finally happens. She’s expressing interest! You’re already thinking of all the moves you can pull, making two girls feel ecstasy at once with your superior lovemaking skills. The long, overly detailed stories you will tell your best friends over a beer the next night. It’s all too perfect. It’s finally coming together!
But then it’s never really quite what you expected. What you thought would be a no-holds-barred, sealed DVD experience never quite works out. A bunch of rules come into play. You can’t touch the other girl, your girlfriend will get jealous! No one quite knows exactly what they are doing, how are you supposed to incorporate this new 3rd person? You suggest something you’ve seen or read, and kill the momentum with your disgusting thoughts. There's lots of fumbling around, a smidgen of same sex erotica, and then nothing really. You go to bed unsatisfied, and think of the lie you are going to tell your friends at the bar the next day. Where did it all go wrong? How could pornography lie to you like this? Two fantastic women, you thought it would be so good. You wanted it to be so good.
Kind of like music supergroups really.
When fans heard Max Bemis of Say Anything and Chris Conley of Saves the Day were getting together to make sweet beautiful music, they were invited to the threesome of the year. What could go wrong? Both men have superior musical chops. Both men have interesting vocals and brilliant lyrical ability. In their own bands, their music has paved the way in the scene. Together, they put out a pop rock record, and not a terribly interesting one at that.
"Crawl" is a promising opener. The two voices, though incredibly different, compliment each other well. Conley is at his most nasal on this record, and some may find it grating. However his distinctive yelp contrasts perfectly with Bemis’ deeper growl. Bemis sounds as he always does. He has one of the more unique deliveries in the scene today and it still works in the context of Two Tongues. You will notice immediately that the lyrics don’t reach the height of either band. They contain neither the cutting wit of Bemis, nor the dark poetic imagery of Conley. It’s all standard boy likes girl stuff, and it continues throughout the album.
Musically, the album's not up to scratch either. Of course it’s decent, radio-friendly stuff, not harmful to the ears stuff. It just feels like they could have done so much more based on their pedigree. Some songs have fairly catchy hooks; "Wowee Zowee" is a great cut, obvious single material. The most interesting track is "Back Against the Wall," with its pounding synth complimenting a nice guitar riff. Perhaps if they had tried more stuff like this the album would have been more interesting.
Unfortunately, Two Tongues is not the album everyone wanted it to be. While it has a number of good songs, none ever really reach greatness. What’s worse is that the album has a number of plain, uninspired songs. No, the musical ménage a trois ends up like they all do: lots of fumbling, a little awkward, and wonderment over why it wasn’t what you always imagined it to be.
Say Anything; Saves the Day; Your dreams becoming a not quite lovely reality
myspace.com/twotonguesrock (http://www.myspace.com/twotonguesrock)