My boyfriend had sex with a prostitute. How do I deal?

[butmisterlahey]

This is sketchy for a first post, but it's currently what's on my mind.

About a year and a half ago in the beginning of our relationship my boyfriend confessed to me that he lost his virginity to a prostitute. He told me recently that he "bought" her online, she was twice his age (he was 18 at the time. 21 now), he had sex with her twice in a period of one month and both times were at his house while his parents were on vacation. He used protection. When he told me a year and a half ago I was really in shock and disgusted, but I brushed it off and decided what was in the pass was in the pass. However, I can't help, but sometimes obsess over the fact that he did it. It's something that repeats in my head and I find it hard to sometimes block it out because I'm so disgusted by it. Except my boyfriend and I really love each other and he wouldn't hurt me. We're very committed. But damn. How can I stop thinking about it? What should I do? Should I tell him how I feel? And if I do would it even be necessary? I kinda don't want to bring it up to him because I fear it will make him angry, or upset, or whatever. I already made it clear that I was disgusted by it to him, but it doesn't change the fact that I obsess over it sometimes. I can't do anything about it now and neither can he. He said it was at a time where he was dealing with emotional issues and drug abuse and he regrets it, but is that really an excuse?

We have a healthy sex life; a good relationship, but it bothers me to a point where I have to think about the details, what happen, the fact that he paid a woman he didn't even know who was twice his age, that he did it with her twice and it was his first time with her.
I know that solicitation of prostitution is common in a lot of man, but this particular case I find to be almost too shocking I can't even handle it sometimes.

I don't know. I guess when I kinda think about it's not the worse thing. It's not like I was with him at the time and he was honest. Most guys would probably keep their mouths shut unless they really cared. I actually hear that a lot of guys have had sex or some form of sexual contact with a prostitute when they are around that age.

But wow. IDK. What do the guys think on this board? About prostitutes, that is. Really, about the whole scenario.

Crazy or neh? Some guys say that it's no different from buying a candy, clothes, jewelry and then fucking her.

What would you feel if you were in my shoes? Would it drive you nuts?

[spansen]

i want to say it first.

tl;dr


(ok, i read.)

[spansen]

don't worry about it. the past is, as you (incorrectly) said, the past.
you can't do anything about it.

prostitutes are gross, where did you hear that that's normal?

[zion the lion]

I'm pretty sure I wouldnt go to a prostitute. But he should get tested because there are diseases that get transmitted through contact and condoms dont protect people from those diseases, then you should get tested because there are diseases (hpv) that really only affect women.

And then...talk to him about it, like have a serious sit down.

[butmisterlahey]

Sorry, if my typing is all fucked up. I didn't bother to look over this.

Well, I got some other guys' opinions on it and I actually read somewhere that it wasn't that uncommon.
They said it wasn't THAT bad and that I wouldn't be as shocked if I weren't a girl.
But I questioned it.

[butmisterlahey]

Oh, he's clean. That's nothing I'm really worried about. I guess it's just really shocking to me.
I've never really known a guy who's had sex with a prostitute. Let alone, my boyfriend.
Now I know of three guys.

[spansen]

i think prostitution is a scary scary thing to every explore.

[zion the lion]

I think if youre raised around it, then its not a big deal. I know a lot of prostitutes who are extremely nice people, their pimps and (sometimes) the people who buy them on the other hand freak me out.

[robat19]

How much did it cost him?

[butmisterlahey]

I know and that's why I found it so shocking, but he tells me that it's not that crazy.

Two of his friends have also done this too. Minus the losing virginity part....or at least I hope not, but those guys are womanizers and they do really bad stuff.

This guy is sweet. I just don't get it. Very unlike him.
But a different time when he was going through a lot.
I blame the drugs.

[butmisterlahey]

He didn't tell me. I was gonna ask, but I stopped myself. He did say it was expensive.

Said it was an escort around her late 30s, early 40's or something. Said she looked like a normal lady. Kinda like a soccer mom.

[spansen]

if you can't move past it, regardless of the relationship and how wonderful it is-- it sounds like that bothers you too much and you may need to consider going elsewhere for your affection.

[jco3]

I know and that's why I found it so shocking, but he tells me that it's not that crazy.

Two of his friends have also done this too. Minus the losing virginity part....or at least I hope not, but those guys are womanizers and they do really bad stuff.

This guy is sweet. I just don't get it. Very unlike him.
But a different time when he was going through a lot.
I blame the drugs.

Sometimes a man's just gotta get his dick sucked...

[butmisterlahey]

if you can't move past it, regardless of the relationship and how wonderful it is-- it sounds like that bothers you too much and you may need to consider going elsewhere for your affection.

I can't say I could ever do that. However I do want to talk to him about how it makes me feel.
I just don't want him to yell at me or anything.

[zion the lion]

I can't say I could ever do that. However I do want to talk to him about how it makes me feel.
I just don't want him to yell at me or anything.

Why would he yell at you?

[spansen]

well, he was honest.
getting into my last relationship she was honest about her past, which was good.
it didn't much bother me, sometimes it did, but mostly it didn't.. and now that we've gone our separate ways.. it makes it look worse on her and her decision making.. but it doesn't matter one way or the other for me anymore, so she can be a slut. ha

[Tyler Revolution]

I actually hear that a lot of guys have had sex or some form of sexual contact with a prostitute when they are around that age.

Haha, did he tell you this? As far as I know, NONE of my friends have ever been with a prostitute, and I doubt that "a lot of guys" have around that age.

[Duexy]

Sometimes a man's just gotta get his dick sucked...


this thread might be worth watching.

:popcorn:

[spansen]

Why would he yell at you?
because it'd be annoying, given she's already talked to him about it, and guys hate confrontation.

[butmisterlahey]

Sometimes a man's just gotta get his dick sucked...


I know, but losing your virginity to one.

*SIGH*

I don't know. That's pretty crazy.

[Tyler Revolution]

prostitutes are gross, where did you hear that that's normal?

Lol, thank you.

[spansen]

where are you from?

evidently alaska is slutty.

[butmisterlahey]

Haha, did he tell you this? As far as I know, NONE of my friends have ever been with a prostitute, and I doubt that "a lot of guys" have around that age.


Trust me. THEY HAVE. One of them I know for sure because he's that type.
But other one I can honestly show doubt for.

[zion the lion]

where are you from?

evidently alaska is slutty.

I just heard this is the number 1 state for rapes. Of course alaska is slutty, theres nothing to do if you dont like nature or snow sports.

[spansen]

so.. does that make you..... you know... hahaha

[butmisterlahey]

because it'd be annoying, given she's already talked to him about it, and guys hate confrontation.


What he said. Guys don't want to talk about this stuff and I have brought it up to him... Well, actually no. He brought it up to me. Only because I was talking about what his friends did and he thought I was referring to him.
But, I was kinda being light and laughing it off like it wasn't a big deal. I probably more upfront.

[spansen]

again, you're not going to get anything other than an awkward conversation (filled with more than a handful of awkward pauses) out of it. he can't do anything about it. it happened.

[butmisterlahey]

where are you from?

evidently alaska is slutty.


No, I live in California.


...Alaska?

[spansen]

zion the lion.

[OldJersey]

So how ugly is your boyfriend...?

[butmisterlahey]

so.. does that make you..... you know... hahaha

Are you asking me something?

[spansen]

... again, zion the lion.

[butmisterlahey]

So how ugly is your boyfriend...?


He's not ugly at all. He could easily had sex with another girl and he did (not me).

That's why I blame the drugs.

[Duexy]

blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol.

[thetrueblood]

the thing is he probably just thinks you're a slut and wants YOU to be a prostitute. run. run far, and don't stop until you're in no where north dakota and he will never find you again.

[OldJersey]

He's not ugly at all. He could easily had sex with another girl and he did (not me).

That's why I blame the drugs.


I mean, bangin a prostitute, that's pretty desperate...

[butmisterlahey]

again, you're not going to get anything other than an awkward conversation (filled with more than a handful of awkward pauses) out of it. he can't do anything about it. it happened.


Well, he has not been awkward about except when he first told me. What I fear is he will either yell at me a lot until I cry (well, not cry) or he will be very upset that I'm bringing it up.

I feel if I talk it out I'll be less obsessed.
Either that or I just gotta face the news and say, "Hey, he had a rough year."
Either way it would take some time. It's already been over a year since I've known.

[thetrueblood]

Bs

[zion the lion]

so.. does that make you..... you know... hahaha

is that a (kind of) question for me? And what are you saying?

[Anderson]

From the forum home page this thread showed up as "My Boyfriend had sex with a". This thread is so disappointing given all the possibilities.

[zion the lion]

From the forum home page this thread showed up as "My Boyfriend had sex with a". This thread is so disappointing given all the possibilities.

I thought it was going to say goat or pig...or transvestite

[swt_catastrophe]

I mean, bangin a prostitute, that's pretty desperate...
:nod: ick

[butmisterlahey]

blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol.


Well, he did tell me he was drunk.

But he was drinking everyday. Said he did it because he thought he was gonna die soon and he didn't want to die a virgin and that he "wanted to do whatever the fuck he wanted and didn't give a shit about life"

So I can see where his mind state was. Drugs and Booze.

Kinda fucked really. His last girlfriend dumped him big time because of this.

Said she found out and called her on the phone one when he was really drunk. She called a bunch of names and crap. Said he said "FUCK YOU, YOU FAT BITCH" and hung up on her.

That was the end of that. And she found out from a bunch of friends who told everyone in his little circle.

[butmisterlahey]

I thought it was going to say goat or pig...or transvestite

I was wondering if anyone would think that.

[butmisterlahey]

From the forum home page this thread showed up as "My Boyfriend had sex with a". This thread is so disappointing given all the possibilities.


Sorry.
But it's makes a prostitute look like a princess.
So I have that, at least.

[bung]

In the words of George Costanza: "Parking in the city is just like sex. Why should I pay for it when, if I apply myself, I might be able to get it for free?"

[jco3]

:nod: ick

that head nod is just too creepy.

[Trioxide]

i wouldnt worry about it. what he did before you came along shouldnt matter.

[phil19]

well if it was before you met him then i dont think theres any issue. if he slept with a prostie when you were together then you have an issue

[LaDiabla]

Hasn't anybody said 'Anal' yet?

Anal.

[anamericangod]

Was she hot?

[killerswells]

If it happened before you hooked up, then get over it...I'm sure there are a few questionable gentlemen on your track record

[Chancetobe]

I mean, I understand why your grossed out. But there is nothing you can do about it now. You either have to get over it, or dump him because you can't get over it. But it seems like you really like him, so, I advise you to forget about it. Or if you have to, talking to him and say "Blah blah, I love you, but what you did back then bothers me, and i just wanted to talk about it so that i can forget about it, never bring it up again, and we can go on with our relationship."

[Paulb-182]

If she was expensive she was one of those fancy hookers no doubt. well done to him

[Charles777]

"Some say prostitution, is a victimless crime. Then where is my wallet? Do you have my wallet bitch?!" - Max Weinberg

[anamericangod]

Are you dating Eddie Murphy?

[trappedintime]

Have sex with every guy he's friends with.

[googirl8907]

Get a new boyfriend.

[hypnotized]

Get over it, seriously. I know it's hard but what he did back then was based on how he was back then and from what you've said, it seems as if he has changed and you both really like each other and everything so why are you worrying about something that happened when you didn't know each other, which means it has nothing to do with you besides the fact that he told you which I guess is a pretty decent thing of him to do because his last girlfriend dumped him big time because of it but still, he ran the risk of facing that again and told you.

Forget about it and enjoy what you have now.

[argg_xo]

holy shit. is your boyfriend named raul and happen to live in the metro-detroit area?

[JJJ.]

He fucked a girl before he met you, you've probably fucked boys.
She happens to be a prostitute, I don't get what the deal is really

[Kassie09]

I wouldn't really be okay with his level of desperateness.

[mybreakingpoint]

i wouldn't know how to get a prostitute even if i wanted to hahaha

i'm pretty sheltered, i guess :shrug:

[JJJ.]

Maybe he wasn't desperate, maybe he just wanted a shag?

And dude, not hard! Adultwork, Craigslist, gumtree, or hang around the dodgy bit of town at night ha

[Kassie09]

I feel like it's desperate because it's how he lost his virginity, obviously he thought it'd never happen unless he paid someone.

[n1asfan]

Why would you stay with him if he confessed that in the BEGINNING of the relationship??

If some guy I just started dating told me he fucked a prostitute that would initially turn me off to the whole idea of him and me as a couple. But instead you waited till the relationship got more serious to confront him about it!. Makes no sense to me.

[spansen]

is that a (kind of) question for me? And what are you saying?
well, we've established that alaska is a breeding ground for sluts, and such. ha

[GeenaMonique]

I understand EXACTLY where you are coming from. I actually found out that my ex was cheating onme with prostitutes when I discovered his Naughty Reviews (http://www.naughtyreviews.com/) user account in our web history. I don't really have a problem with prostitution, but when it comes to my men it's either ME or them... His actions told me that he chose them.

[Villanova1L]

Trust me. THEY HAVE. One of them I know for sure because he's that type.
But other one I can honestly show doubt for.

Not one of my friends have done more than a hj from a stripper.

Sounds like there is a communication breakdown in your relationship if you can't talk about this. It is a big deal, but if he's clean why hold it against him?

[DamienSaysHi]

Its in his past who cares, he didnt cheat on you with a ho

[anthonydarko]

Well, he did tell me he was drunk.

But he was drinking everyday. Said he did it because he thought he was gonna die soon and he didn't want to die a virgin and that he "wanted to do whatever the fuck he wanted and didn't give a shit about life"

So I can see where his mind state was. Drugs and Booze.

Kinda fucked really. His last girlfriend dumped him big time because of this.

Said she found out and called her on the phone one when he was really drunk. She called a bunch of names and crap. Said he said "FUCK YOU, YOU FAT BITCH" and hung up on her.

That was the end of that. And she found out from a bunch of friends who told everyone in his little circle.
Sounds like a real winner. Seriously, this guy is fucked up.

[Heart-A-Tact]

I wouldn't really be okay with his level of desperateness.

Agreed. A prostitute? Come the fuck on.

[.invisible ink.]

at least he was honest about it :shrug:

as long as he hasn't gotten any diseases, i don't think it should be a relationship killer, i mean, as others have already stated, it happened before you even knew him. people make mistakes, who are we to judge?

[thesafeword]

Maybe he wasn't desperate, maybe he just wanted a shag?

And dude, not hard! Adultwork, Craigslist, gumtree, or hang around the dodgy bit of town at night ha
/sweet ad

[Duexy]

I understand EXACTLY where you are coming from. I actually found out that my ex was cheating onme with prostitutes when I discovered his Naughty Reviews (http://www.naughtyreviews.com/) user account in our web history. I don't really have a problem with prostitution, but when it comes to my men it's either ME or them... His actions told me that he chose them.


thx for the link

[speakhandsforme]

Hmm, so he goes for the skanky, trashy hooker type...

[JJJ.]

/sweet ad

I try

[samsara]

The past is the past. Let it be.

[samsara]

effin' eh man its a triple post.

[Duexy]

I try
You're trying too hard.

[MarsEatWorld]

i wouldn't know how to get a prostitute even if i wanted to hahaha

i'm pretty sheltered, i guess :shrug:
oh nathan.

[argg_xo]

i wouldn't know how to get a prostitute even if i wanted to hahaha

i'm pretty sheltered, i guess :shrug:
come to detroit, we have hookers galore!

[robat19]

come to detroit, we have hookers galore!

It's legal in Canada! We can get a couple after we hit up the boom boom room!

[mybreakingpoint]

oh nathan.

that's what they all say ;-)

come to detroit, we have hookers galore!

i am a hooker, i just can't find anymore of my kind.

[argg_xo]

It's legal in Canada! We can get a couple after we hit up the boom boom room!
hahhahaa! my friend paulie went to canada last year and wandered away from his group of friends and ended up getting a massage and asked for a happy ending. they weren't too pleased with him.

did you know they have TWO boom boom rooms?!!?

[MarsEatWorld]

that's what they all say ;-)



i am a hooker, i just can't find anymore of my kind.
fire crotch and her clan? cute..

[robat19]

hahhahaa! my friend paulie went to canada last year and wandered away from his group of friends and ended up getting a massage and asked for a happy ending. they weren't too pleased with him.

did you know they have TWO boom boom rooms?!!?

Two!? I'm gunna be over there for my friends 19th on like June 18th. Might have to go...

[argg_xo]

that's what they all say ;-)



i am a hooker, i just can't find anymore of my kind.
you're living on the wrong side of the state, silly!

[argg_xo]

Two!? I'm gunna be over there for my friends 19th on like June 18th. Might have to go...
well color me jealous!!! my bff went across the border last week and reported back that there are 2 boom boom rooms, i have not confirmed this myself, you should confirm this fact when you visit in june.

[mybreakingpoint]

fire crotch and her clan? cute..

delicious

you're living on the wrong side of the state, silly!

apparently haha

add me on facebook or myspace or something, there werne't any links in your profile haha

also, your most recent twitter made me sad

[robat19]

well color me jealous!!! my bff went across the border last week and reported back that there are 2 boom boom rooms, i have not confirmed this myself, you should confirm this fact when you visit in june.

I thought you were coming???

[MarsEatWorld]

delicious



apparently haha

add me on facebook or myspace or something, there werne't any links in your profile haha

also, your most recent twitter made me sad
Share?

[argg_xo]

delicious



apparently haha

add me on facebook or myspace or something, there werne't any links in your profile haha

also, your most recent twitter made me sad
we're already friends on myspace! and my last twitter made me sad too :-(
I thought you were coming???
oh!! is that the canada trip i was invited to!? well i guess we'll figure it out together!

[acfrue]

holy shit. is your boyfriend named raul and happen to live in the metro-detroit area?

Please stop talking about my alter ego.


did you know they have TWO boom boom rooms?!!?

As if one wasn't enough?

[mybreakingpoint]

Share?

haha share what?

we're already friends on myspace! and my last twitter made me sad too :-(

oh!! is that the canada trip i was invited to!? well i guess we'll figure it out together!

are we? leave me a comment so i know it's you hahaha :-)

[robat19]

we're already friends on myspace! and my last twitter made me sad too :-(

oh!! is that the canada trip i was invited to!? well i guess we'll figure it out together!

well I that's the next time I'm going. We're really just going for the casino, but I'm sure we could make a trip to the boom boom room.

[argg_xo]

Please stop talking about my alter ego.



As if one wasn't enough?
hahahahaha! so you're a tall skinny mexican that may or may not have raped some girl and lost his virginity to a mexican hooker in mexico?!?! wtf raul!!!!!!!!!!!!!
haha share what?



are we? leave me a comment so i know it's you hahaha :-)
okay, leaving you a comment!

[argg_xo]

well I that's the next time I'm going. We're really just going for the casino, but I'm sure we could make a trip to the boom boom room.
i have never been to casino windsor, i've seen the hallway of the day's inn and the pita stop. besides the sweet ass clubs windsor has to offer.

[acfrue]

hahahahaha! so you're a tall skinny mexican that may or may not have raped some girl and lost his virginity to a mexican hooker in mexico?!?! wtf raul!!!!!!!!!!!!!


THATZ LEEGAL IN MEXICO!!

[MarsEatWorld]

haha share what?



are we? leave me a comment so i know it's you hahaha :-)
her and her clan?

[thesafeword]

In America, the women have a choice.

That's no good for Borat... (Raul)

[mybreakingpoint]

hahahahaha! so you're a tall skinny mexican that may or may not have raped some girl and lost his virginity to a mexican hooker in mexico?!?! wtf raul!!!!!!!!!!!!!

okay, leaving you a comment!

yersssssssssssssss

[robat19]

i have never been to casino windsor, i've seen the hallway of the day's inn and the pita stop. besides the sweet ass clubs windsor has to offer.

It's pretty nice. It's owned by Caesars, the same place that's in Vegas. You should go there some time.

[mybreakingpoint]

her and her clan?

no, i'm very posessive

[argg_xo]

yersssssssssssssss
are we following each other on twitter?
It's pretty nice. It's owned by Caesars, the same place that's in Vegas. You should go there some time.
it's probably a hell of a lot nicer than the day's inn hallway and the pita place

[thesiz]

i think its awesome he did that. if its good enough for kenny powers its good enough for me.

[robat19]

are we following each other on twitter?

it's probably a hell of a lot nicer than the day's inn hallway and the pita place

Haha, more than likely.

[MarsEatWorld]

no, i'm very posessive
*sniffsniff*

I'm going to go cry and sleep.
gnite.

[argg_xo]

Haha, more than likely.
ohh i was going to see the beach boys at casino windsor last year, but i forgot to buy tickets.

[mybreakingpoint]

are we following each other on twitter?

it's probably a hell of a lot nicer than the day's inn hallway and the pita place

i don't have a twitter haha

cue adam saying "see?! you have to get one!!"

*sniffsniff*

I'm going to go cry and sleep.
gnite.

i ain't sharin' my bitches, man.

[robat19]

ohh i was going to see the beach boys at casino windsor last year, but i forgot to buy tickets.

Haha, if it was this year they probably would have given them to me for free. Not sure if it would have been as sweet as Dr. Phil.

[argg_xo]

i don't have a twitter haha

cue adam saying "see?! you have to get one!!"



i ain't sharin' my bitches, man.
i thought you just said my last twitter made you sad, i'm so confused!

[robat19]

i don't have a twitter haha

cue adam saying "see?! you have to get one!!"



i ain't sharin' my bitches, man.

see!? you have to get one!!

[argg_xo]

Haha, if it was this year they probably would have given them to me for free. Not sure if it would have been as sweet as Dr. Phil.
do you have a sweet casino windsor hookup or something? this guy i knew used to get free ribs from max and ermas because he found a paint brush bristle in his ribs once

[mybreakingpoint]

i thought you just said my last twitter made you sad, i'm so confused!

i clicked the link to your twitter on your AP profile and saw it, but i don't have one myself.

[acfrue]

i don't have a twitter haha


You're sooooo lame, all the cool kids have a twitter.

[mybreakingpoint]

see!? you have to get one!!

:hitself:

[robat19]

do you have a sweet casino windsor hookup or something? this guy i knew used to get free ribs from max and ermas because he found a paint brush bristle in his ribs once

Haha, not really. You just sign up for a players club card and they give you free rooms and tickets and whatever else. I've just lost a good amount of money there and it builds up points.

[mybreakingpoint]

You're sooooo lame, all the queer kids have a twitter.

fixed.

[acfrue]

see?! you have to get one!!


see!? you have to get one!!

QFF, quoted for fail.

[robat19]

QFF, quoted for fail.
That was on purpose. I didn't want it to be the exact same.

[argg_xo]

i clicked the link to your twitter on your AP profile and saw it, but i don't have one myself.
ohhh gotcha! i went back and looked at my twitter and was like, nathan is not following me!
You're sooooo lame, all the cool kids have a twitter.
or so they can stalk dave's every move!
Haha, not really. You just sign up for a players club card and they give you free rooms and tickets and whatever else. I've just lost a good amount of money there and it builds up points.
ohhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! i just wanna play the penny slots and drink margaritas or mudslides.

[mybreakingpoint]

QFF, quoted for fail.

adam is just constantly full of fail.

[mybreakingpoint]

That was on purpose. I didn't want it to be the exact same.

lie



we should just make an Official Michigan AP Kids Chat Thread

[acfrue]

That was on purpose. I didn't want it to be the exact same.

Riiiiiiiiggggghhhhhttttttt.....


or so they can stalk dave's every move!

lol, he tweets about everything and I love it.

[robat19]

ohhh gotcha! i went back and looked at my twitter and was like, nathan is not following me!

or so they can stalk dave's every move!

ohhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! i just wanna play the penny slots and drink margaritas or mudslides.

Penny slots are awesome but they can be expensive. My grandma won like $3000 on one a couple weeks ago.

[argg_xo]

Riiiiiiiiggggghhhhhttttttt.....



lol, he tweets about everything and I love it.
and you tweet right back!

[argg_xo]

Penny slots are awesome but they can be expensive. My grandma won like $3000 on one a couple weeks ago.
I'M MISSING OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i've never even been to greek town or motor city casino!

[andrew4045]

lol at all posts

[robat19]

lie



we should just make an Official Michigan AP Kids Chat Thread

Make one in general. You could probably get away with it.

[robat19]

I'M MISSING OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i've never even been to greek town or motor city casino!

You should go! If I could I would go there. The only one close in MI that I can go to is Mt. Pleasant. I'd rather go to Canada anyways. Mt. Pleasant is pretty boring.

[argg_xo]

You should go! If I could I would go there. The only one close in MI that I can go to is Mt. Pleasant. I'd rather go to Canada anyways. Mt. Pleasant is pretty boring.
i think my grandma takes the senior bus up to mt.pleasant and spends the day at the casino sometimes, it sounds very thrilling!

[mybreakingpoint]

Make one in general. You could probably get away with it.

hahaha i probably could but i don't want to take any chances annoying tristan or eda since technically we're not supposed to have other chat threads or whatever

[robat19]

i think my grandma takes the senior bus up to mt.pleasant and spends the day at the casino sometimes, it sounds very thrilling!

Soooooo many old people there, haha.

[argg_xo]

Soooooo many old people there, haha.
i still need to visit many places downtown detroit. i think i'll conquer that before i go to mt. pleasant!

[butmisterlahey]

He fucked a girl before he met you, you've probably fucked boys.
She happens to be a prostitute, I don't get what the deal is really

I lost my virginity to him. So no.
Except there was one other guy just before him, but I didn't fuck him.

[butmisterlahey]

Was she hot?

All he told me was she was older and that she looked normal. Like a normal older lady dressed in a top and jeans with a little purse or bag or something. He said she was very classy and expensive. Said she was an "Escort"
One of those women you kinda order to come to your house and they usually require to be very clean although it's better he did use a condom.
Not like a street walker wearing fishnets and a halter top.
Kinda made it seem like she was the hot mom type.
Anyway. I guess I've decided not to bring it up since it would be pointless a year and a half later and I'm quite sure he does not really want to go into it anymore than he already has. That's understandable.
To answer a couple of questions I didn't break up with him after he told me because he's such a good guy and when he was 18 and it was very, very dark time in his life and it was just as dark before then.

So I settled with forgive and forget despite how shocking it is to me. He's at least a better person now and yes, clean as well. But I think a lot of you are right. Forget about it.
Our relationship is way too precious. Not to mention we plan on marriage. I don't think it's gonna come between us. So it's pretty pointless.

I guess I do pretty well without thinking about it. It's just those times when I do. Then it's like "SHIT".
And it kinda hits me all over again. The reality of it.

[lonelysuperstar]

If you're too scared to talk to him about this for fear of what his reaction migt be, how do you expect to survive marriage? Issues always need to be talked about and resolved. Even if it's in the past, it clearly affects you, and your relationship may suffer if you hide your feelings.

[SgtSmegma]

I think if youre raised around it, then its not a big deal. I know a lot of prostitutes who are extremely nice people, their pimps and (sometimes) the people who buy them on the other hand freak me out.

...wat

How much did it cost him?

Good question. Would like to know.

[robat19]

Where did this happen? Like what city?

[SgtSmegma]

Well, he did tell me he was drunk.

But he was drinking everyday. Said he did it because he thought he was gonna die soon and he didn't want to die a virgin and that he "wanted to do whatever the fuck he wanted and didn't give a shit about life"

So I can see where his mind state was. Drugs and Booze.

Kinda fucked really. His last girlfriend dumped him big time because of this.

Said she found out and called her on the phone one when he was really drunk. She called a bunch of names and crap. Said he said "FUCK YOU, YOU FAT BITCH" and hung up on her.

That was the end of that. And she found out from a bunch of friends who told everyone in his little circle.

Sounds like a winner. You fail at selecting a possible life partner.

And I can't for the life of me determine any possible reason that the girlfriend of a guy who lost his virginity to a prostitute would be upset about that fact. Sounds like a very irrational reason for breaking up with someone.

[limepomegranate]

i think everyone needs to get over it. like right now.

[fadedmemories]

Have sex with a male prostitute.

[killerswells]

Have sex with a male prostitute.

this.


its the only reasonable thing to do...WWJD?

[fadedmemories]

this.

I'm surprised she didn't think of it by herself.

[killerswells]

I'm surprised she didn't think of it by herself.

seriously...

[bigblue2015]

This thread is a real winner.

[butmisterlahey]

Sounds like a winner. You fail at selecting a possible life partner.

And I can't for the life of me determine any possible reason that the girlfriend of a guy who lost his virginity to a prostitute would be upset about that fact. Sounds like a very irrational reason for breaking up with someone.

Actually, my boyfriend is a very committed and spiritual person who would make a great life partner. That's not really for you to judge.
Thank You.

[butmisterlahey]

Have sex with a male prostitute.


No

[butmisterlahey]

Where did this happen? Like what city?


Like I'd say.
Where it happen doesn't really have much to with anything.

If you're too scared to talk to him about this for fear of what his reaction migt be, how do you expect to survive marriage? Issues always need to be talked about and resolved. Even if it's in the past, it clearly affects you, and your relationship may suffer if you hide your feelings.

Neh, I really don't think so. If we were gonna suffer it would have happened already. This isn't something that bothers me to point where I want to break up or anything.
Shocking as it may be I've decided to just get over it.

[oldwirehands]

Don't care if this already has been said (i'm drunk and don't want to read the whole thread).

The past is the past. The only worry I would have is to make sure he is clean. And obviously, if he did this while you were together, its bogus. Other than that, don't worry about it. Prostitution is the world's oldest occupation. He was just participating in a human ritual thousands of years old. If it was readily available, I'd fuck a prostitute too. As long as the skank is clean, its all good. Just get over it and enjoy your relationship. They never last forever so just enjoy it and be happy he isn't fucking prostitutes while you're together.

[Duexy]

Like I'd say.
If we were gonna suffer it would have happened already.


lolwut?

[TheByrus]

you should have sex with the same prostitute so you're even.

[alltimehoe93]

Have sex with a male prostitute.
omg that's terrible, Jay! hahah, ah jeez.

[TheOtherAndrew]

Kill the prostitute and dump her dead body on his front porch.

Then kill him.

[SgtSmegma]

Actually, my boyfriend is a very committed and spiritual person who would make a great life partner. That's not really for you to judge.
Thank You.

No, it is for me to judge. Its for you to consider that judgment valid or not. Clearly you don't, and probably rightfully so. I've always just considered solicitation of prostitutes a red flag for potential character issues, but what do I know?

[silentstar1134]

Sometimes a man's just gotta get his dick sucked...

This

[killerswells]

Are you from canada?

You have trailer park boys as your avatar so im gonna assume yes....

If that is the case, I've seen some hot prostitutes near the corner of Jarvis & Carlton in downtown Toronto, tell your boyfriend to go there next time...

Why would he choose a soccer mom for his first time? Thats like drinking natty light on your 21st birthday...

[fadedmemories]

No

omg that's terrible, Jay! hahah, ah jeez.
But that's the only way for her to get even :shrug:

[theguywithpiano]

i know this sounds cliche but if you really love him, stick with him.
it was stupid of him but it was all in the PAST!
you just have to move on.. accept him for who he is.
that is true love :)

[Jason_Merch]

I would never pay for sex. For one, it's just tacky. If you can't get a girl without having two flatout pay, you don't deserve it. Part of getting laid is the hunt and the kill. You really should have to earn it. Two, it's gross. You don't know where those girls have been, plus they're usually hideous. Besides that, maybe he felt pressured into it. Being a virgin is a huge weight to bear these days. And being one at 18...hell, you might as well just save it for marriage. I know it sounds shitty but it's the truth. I lost mine when I was 14, just so I could get the damn thing over with. So I don't know that it's wrong per se, unless you were together when he was doing it. Then it was cheating.

[alltimehoe93]

But that's the only way for her to get even :shrug:
I don't think she should get even. She'd be doing something just as gross as he did.
i know this sounds cliche but if you really love him, stick with him.
it was stupid of him but it was all in the PAST!
you just have to move on.. accept him for who he is.
that is true love :)
This.
I would never pay for sex. For one, it's just tacky. If you can't get a girl without having two flatout pay, you don't deserve it. Part of getting laid is the hunt and the kill. You really should have to earn it. Two, it's gross. You don't know where those girls have been, plus they're usually hideous. Besides that, maybe he felt pressured into it. Being a virgin is a huge weight to bear these days. And being one at 18...hell, you might as well just save it for marriage. I know it sounds shitty but it's the truth. I lost mine when I was 14, just so I could get the damn thing over with. So I don't know that it's wrong per se, unless you were together when he was doing it. Then it was cheating.
hahaha. I agree with what you said though.

[fadedmemories]

I don't think she should get even. She'd be doing something just as gross as he did.

Fair enough beer bro :-)

[stayforawhile]

Castrate him?

[mel bell]

Leave it in the past. It was a long time ago and it doesn't seem like you want to end the relationship. You guys seem to love each other very much and you'll have to sit down and talk to him about it. That's really the only way to get through it.

[Sventhegreat]

you should have sex with the same prostitute so you're even.

Yes. Please do this.

[ashmic]

best advice I ever heard

[tottivillarossi]

I would never pay for sex. For one, it's just tacky. If you can't get a girl without having two flatout pay, you don't deserve it. Part of getting laid is the hunt and the kill.

I'm sorry, but that's tacky.

[ashmic]

Originally Posted by Jason_Merchhttp://images.absolutepunk.net/images/buttons/arrow.gif (http://www.absolutepunk.net/showthread.php?p=39513552#post39513 552)
I would never pay for sex. For one, it's just tacky. If you can't get a girl without having two flatout pay, you don't deserve it. Part of getting laid is the hunt and the kill.

saying that is like saying you prefer to go hunt for your meat instead of going to the supermarket and paying for it.

[iamyourgodnow]

Make sure you give better sex than the latter.

[Colombianpapi]

It's in the past so you or him cannot change it, however if it's important to you you need to know if he's intending on repeating this behavior in the future.. People go through phases when their young and do suprising things, so of which they are not proud of and learn from it and know how to recognize situations in the future and prevent them from happening again. Good luck!

[.invisible ink.]

wtf? weird bump.

[Deadbolt23]

So...she finished with him right?

[samsara]

Someone search functioned "prostitute"

[xxxfreakxxx]

hahaha god damn its the past.
whats he ganna do bout it.

[Adam106]

I think she decided to just get over it.
Just reading some of this there are some weird fucking opinions here

[SaveGwenStacy]

leave a fake hooker add at his house. see if he calls, show up at his house.

[wendjiqn]

lol

[Jennurna Gray]

leave a fake hooker add at his house. see if he calls, show up at his house.
Hahaha. Sounds like something I would do.

[oldwirehands]

If you can't get a girl without having two flatout pay, you don't deserve it. Part of getting laid is the hunt and the kill. You really should have to earn it.

Spoken like a true castrated male. If you're working hard at getting laid, I feel bad for you.

[hellogorgeous]

Ohhhh just because it is the internet does not mean you can spell things incorrectly

[:-)]

Forgive and forget. That was 3 years ago... he's more mature now, he has better judgement, and he has a steady girlfriend like you.
I can see why it would bother you, but I strongly think you need to let it go.

[Scrawns]

:appl:

get it? clap clap clap

[GetWellBoss]

not going to lie. ive always wanted to hire a professional(and i mean actual professional like the girls in Nevada..not some lady on the street corner). i think it could be fun. haha.

[TheNexPervySage]

Clearly none off you have been in his shoes. But neither have I (the drugs). Like him I've had a rough couple of years. Lots of things. Among that being 21 AND SINGLE SINCE BIRTH i ALSO LOST IT TO AN ESCORT. Her name was Jesse. She was petite... and has consequently affected my "type." It was so worth it. I mean I feel like an almost rapist, but she kind of did all that stuff without me really saying anything, I was so nervous and lasted forever. She made me promise to buy her some stuff, I have to go and give it to her soon, its just she lives far away.

Whenever I was picked on in school I'd smash the guys faces in, so they never bothered me again, but the girls that picked on me really got me. I have no confidence when it comes to women and all the girls I've ever asked out turned me down or ditched me. There's a girl I like at my job, she's always "busy" after work so can't hangout. As a man I have to tell her how I really feel, but I have to save up because this may end up becoming my sixth straight rejection and my confidence when it comes to women will be even lower than now which doesn't even seem possible. So I'll need to visit a couple of escorts to keep from shooting myself.

Look at it this way. A person with down syndrome is just as intelligent as a normal person. They just look extremely different, but many become engineers or doctors. How do you expect an intelligent man that has down syndrome to ever land a woman he considers attractive. It probably wont happen, so his only alternative to ever keep his pride an get some action are to go to the women who accept all of us outcasts.

Now before you assume I'm hideous I'm not. I've had friends GFs and the guys they're with tell me I don't know why your single your better looking than so and so. And people are always telling me that ladies are hitting on me, but because of my higher than average intelligence and skillsets came at a price, I have below average ability to socialize. I cannot aproach a woman I am interested in. And even when I do and I "socialize correctly" I still dont get a good result. Bottom line I have 3 options visit hookers when I have enough money, be celabic, or become rich and get a new gold digger gf every couple of years. Sadly I'm a man with needs and will only consider 2 of those options. Luckily I'm still clean.

And just talk to him. If he doesn't cheat on you what is the big deal. I'm sure you werne't a virgin prior to the relationship. He just happened to pay one of his partners, that's all. If I'm ever in a relationship I wont cheat. But if she's says its over it's time to spend some of my emergency cash.

[SgtSmegma]

Clearly none off you have been in his shoes. But neither have I (the drugs). Like him I've had a rough couple of years. Lots of things. Among that being 21 AND SINGLE SINCE BIRTH i ALSO LOST IT TO AN ESCORT. Her name was Jesse. She was petite... and has consequently affected my "type." It was so worth it. I mean I feel like an almost rapist, but she kind of did all that stuff without me really saying anything, I was so nervous and lasted forever. She made me promise to buy her some stuff, I have to go and give it to her soon, its just she lives far away.

Whenever I was picked on in school I'd smash the guys faces in, so they never bothered me again, but the girls that picked on me really got me. I have no confidence when it comes to women and all the girls I've ever asked out turned me down or ditched me. There's a girl I like at my job, she's always "busy" after work so can't hangout. As a man I have to tell her how I really feel, but I have to save up because this may end up becoming my sixth straight rejection and my confidence when it comes to women will be even lower than now which doesn't even seem possible. So I'll need to visit a couple of escorts to keep from shooting myself.

Look at it this way. A person with down syndrome is just as intelligent as a normal person. They just look good extremely different, but many become engineers or doctors. How do you expect an intelligent man that has down syndrome to ever land a woman he considers attractive. It probably wont happen, so his only alternative to ever keep his pride an get some action are to go to the women who accept all of us outcasts.

Now before you assume I'm hideous I'm not. I've had friends GFs and the guys they're with tell me I don't know why your single your better looking than so and so. And people are always telling me that ladies are hitting on me, but because of my higher than average intelligence and skillsets came at a price. I cannot aproach a woman I am interested in. And even when I do and I "socialize correctly" I still dont get a good result. Bottom line I have 3 options visit hookers when I have enough money, be celabic, or become rich and get a new gold digger gf every couple of years. Sadly I'm a man with needs and will only consider 2 of those options. Luckily I'm still clean.

Troll? and WTF at the bolded part??

[Sean Rizzo]

What a bump, hahahaha. What a way to join, too.

[terror_91]

How much did it cost him?
And what was the name of this website?

EDIT: Didn't check the date. :-(

[Sean Rizzo]

And what was the name of this website?

EDIT: Didn't check the date. :-(
LOL noob.

[SoCaliBananna93]

This is sketchy for a first post, but it's currently what's on my mind.

About a year and a half ago in the beginning of our relationship my boyfriend confessed to me that he lost his virginity to a prostitute. He told me recently that he "bought" her online, she was twice his age (he was 18 at the time. 21 now), he had sex with her twice in a period of one month and both times were at his house while his parents were on vacation. He used protection. When he told me a year and a half ago I was really in shock and disgusted, but I brushed it off and decided what was in the pass was in the pass. However, I can't help, but sometimes obsess over the fact that he did it. It's something that repeats in my head and I find it hard to sometimes block it out because I'm so disgusted by it. Except my boyfriend and I really love each other and he wouldn't hurt me. We're very committed. But damn. How can I stop thinking about it? What should I do? Should I tell him how I feel? And if I do would it even be necessary? I kinda don't want to bring it up to him because I fear it will make him angry, or upset, or whatever. I already made it clear that I was disgusted by it to him, but it doesn't change the fact that I obsess over it sometimes. I can't do anything about it now and neither can he. He said it was at a time where he was dealing with emotional issues and drug abuse and he regrets it, but is that really an excuse?

We have a healthy sex life; a good relationship, but it bothers me to a point where I have to think about the details, what happen, the fact that he paid a woman he didn't even know who was twice his age, that he did it with her twice and it was his first time with her.
I know that solicitation of prostitution is common in a lot of man, but this particular case I find to be almost too shocking I can't even handle it sometimes.

I don't know. I guess when I kinda think about it's not the worse thing. It's not like I was with him at the time and he was honest. Most guys would probably keep their mouths shut unless they really cared. I actually hear that a lot of guys have had sex or some form of sexual contact with a prostitute when they are around that age.

But wow. IDK. What do the guys think on this board? About prostitutes, that is. Really, about the whole scenario.

Crazy or neh? Some guys say that it's no different from buying a candy, clothes, jewelry and then fucking her.

What would you feel if you were in my shoes? Would it drive you nuts?
Look im young guy but I would never want to loose my virginity to a prostitute, it just depends on the individuals view on sex. But we are human and we all make mistakes we regret... The fact that he told you of those past experiences really shows that he cares about you and wants your realtioship to be special. whenever I talk about some past embarressing habits or incedents its with a girl I really care about...

[ilikesound93]

Look im young guy but I would never want to loose my virginity to a prostitute, it just depends on the individuals view on sex. But we are human and we all make mistakes we regret... The fact that he told you of those past experiences really shows that he cares about you and wants your realtioship to be special. whenever I talk about some past embarressing habits or incedents its with a girl I really care about...

LOSE!

[SoCaliBananna93]

LOSE!
WHAT?! baha

[terror_91]

LOL noob.
Just ban me now!

[Br&New182]

I can't blame you for not forgetting about it, It'd prob irk me too if i was in your shoes. You grow up during these years. nonchalantly ask him what he thinks in hindsight, he'd prob say it wasnt worth it. He prob did just out of curiosity or peer pressure, you never know

[Sean Rizzo]

Just ban me now!
*calls the cyber police*

[yayitsjoe]

you should have sex with a prostitute to get back at him.

[Forever.Zero]

lower your prices

[<*)))><]

This belongs is music because that is what your boyfriend and prostitute made.

[concernedparent]

I'm a dude, and I would be shocked if one of my guy friends had sex with a prostitute. It's not normal. But it's in the past so...who cares?

[Anesthetic]

This is sketchy for a first post, but it's currently what's on my mind.

About a year and a half ago in the beginning of our relationship my boyfriend confessed to me that he lost his virginity to a prostitute. He told me recently that he "bought" her online, she was twice his age (he was 18 at the time. 21 now), he had sex with her twice in a period of one month and both times were at his house while his parents were on vacation. He used protection. When he told me a year and a half ago I was really in shock and disgusted, but I brushed it off and decided what was in the pass was in the pass. However, I can't help, but sometimes obsess over the fact that he did it. It's something that repeats in my head and I find it hard to sometimes block it out because I'm so disgusted by it. Except my boyfriend and I really love each other and he wouldn't hurt me. We're very committed. But damn. How can I stop thinking about it? What should I do? Should I tell him how I feel? And if I do would it even be necessary? I kinda don't want to bring it up to him because I fear it will make him angry, or upset, or whatever. I already made it clear that I was disgusted by it to him, but it doesn't change the fact that I obsess over it sometimes. I can't do anything about it now and neither can he. He said it was at a time where he was dealing with emotional issues and drug abuse and he regrets it, but is that really an excuse?

We have a healthy sex life; a good relationship, but it bothers me to a point where I have to think about the details, what happen, the fact that he paid a woman he didn't even know who was twice his age, that he did it with her twice and it was his first time with her.
I know that solicitation of prostitution is common in a lot of man, but this particular case I find to be almost too shocking I can't even handle it sometimes.

I don't know. I guess when I kinda think about it's not the worse thing. It's not like I was with him at the time and he was honest. Most guys would probably keep their mouths shut unless they really cared. I actually hear that a lot of guys have had sex or some form of sexual contact with a prostitute when they are around that age.

But wow. IDK. What do the guys think on this board? About prostitutes, that is. Really, about the whole scenario.

Crazy or neh? Some guys say that it's no different from buying a candy, clothes, jewelry and then fucking her.

What would you feel if you were in my shoes? Would it drive you nuts?

This is exactly what makes me mad about relationships. When little things get turned into obsessions that ultimately ruin the connection between two people.

It's in the past, you didn't even know him when it happened. Therefore that means when he met you, his new life started. How can you obsess over something you weren't there to prevent or even knew about. Granted, it's stupid to hire a prostitute, but that's his business.

My advice [sorry to sound harsh]: Let go of that insignifcant thought and move on with the relationship. You keep it up and it will ruin you two.

[Hagysaurus Rex]

Clearly none off you have been in his shoes. But neither have I (the drugs). Like him I've had a rough couple of years. Lots of things. Among that being 21 AND SINGLE SINCE BIRTH i ALSO LOST IT TO AN ESCORT. Her name was Jesse. She was petite... and has consequently affected my "type." It was so worth it. I mean I feel like an almost rapist, but she kind of did all that stuff without me really saying anything, I was so nervous and lasted forever. She made me promise to buy her some stuff, I have to go and give it to her soon, its just she lives far away.

Whenever I was picked on in school I'd smash the guys faces in, so they never bothered me again, but the girls that picked on me really got me. I have no confidence when it comes to women and all the girls I've ever asked out turned me down or ditched me. There's a girl I like at my job, she's always "busy" after work so can't hangout. As a man I have to tell her how I really feel, but I have to save up because this may end up becoming my sixth straight rejection and my confidence when it comes to women will be even lower than now which doesn't even seem possible. So I'll need to visit a couple of escorts to keep from shooting myself.

Look at it this way. A person with down syndrome is just as intelligent as a normal person. They just look extremely different, but many become engineers or doctors. How do you expect an intelligent man that has down syndrome to ever land a woman he considers attractive. It probably wont happen, so his only alternative to ever keep his pride an get some action are to go to the women who accept all of us outcasts.

Now before you assume I'm hideous I'm not. I've had friends GFs and the guys they're with tell me I don't know why your single your better looking than so and so. And people are always telling me that ladies are hitting on me, but because of my higher than average intelligence and skillsets came at a price, I have below average ability to socialize. I cannot aproach a woman I am interested in. And even when I do and I "socialize correctly" I still dont get a good result. Bottom line I have 3 options visit hookers when I have enough money, be celabic, or become rich and get a new gold digger gf every couple of years. Sadly I'm a man with needs and will only consider 2 of those options. Luckily I'm still clean.

And just talk to him. If he doesn't cheat on you what is the big deal. I'm sure you werne't a virgin prior to the relationship. He just happened to pay one of his partners, that's all. If I'm ever in a relationship I wont cheat. But if she's says its over it's time to spend some of my emergency cash.

Quality first post.

And old thread is old.