Ditka

[getupkid53]

Mike Ditka vs. The mini Bears
It's a close one. I say ditka puts his big foot right up mini-mchmahon's ass. Right before he steps on walter payton.

Ditka 75, Mini-Bears 72


Any other opponents / outcomes. Enjoy saturday night live glory days and come up with something absurd.

[selftitled85]

best. one. ever...

who would win in a fight...ditka or god?

trick question...ditka is god.

[Caleb Cattivera]

who would win?

ditka or a hurricane?

DITKA!

wait, but the hurricane's name is ditka!

[mat1419]

I had to pull the transcript on this one to get it right, it's my favorite though:

Bill Swerski: Now, gentlemen, let me ask you this: What if Da Bears were all 14 inches tall, you know, about so high? Now, what's your score of today's game?

Carl Wollarski: Against Da Giants?

Bill Swerski: Yes, give 'em a handicap.

Carl Wollarski: Bears 18, Giants 10. And that would finally be a good game.

Pat Arnold: Yeah, it would be a good game. Mini Bears 24, Giants 14.

Todd O'Conner: What about Ditka? Would he be mini, too?

Bill Swerski: No, he would be full-grown.

Todd O'Conner: Oh, then, uh.. Mini Bears 31, Giants 7.

Carl Wollarski: Oh, hold on. Then I change mine, too. I thought it was Mini Ditka.

Bill Swerski: Okay, gentlemen, another scenario: Da Bears, they don't make it, the plane is delayed.. and the only one who shows up is Ditka. Ditka vs. Da Giants. Okay, score, gentlemen.

Pat Arnold: Alright, after da heart attack, I gotta say Ditka 17, Giants 14. He just barely gets by.

Bill Swerski: Alright, that sounds exciting. Perhaps, you know, a late Ditka field goal.

Todd O'Conner: Bears!

Superfans: Bears!!

[mouood]

What if the Bears were to enter the Indy 500, like in a big bus. Who would win?

Would Ditka be driving the bus?