These mood swings are excruciating. The withdrawal symptoms will probably get worse over the next few days. I am shaking. My head hurts. My chest feels heavy. I cannot eat. I cannot sleep. I want to throw up, but there is nothing to throw up. I feel empty. I feel overwhelmed. I feel too much.
There is a need to cry, although I have no reason. There is a need to cry, although I have every reason.
I am fighting, although I do not know the conditions of victory. I do not know if this is a losing battle. I am looking for a truce. A treaty. A white flag. An armistice with myself. None of these will come.
I do not want to do this alone, but I do not believe I have an option. I was never given an option.