I just woke up from a dream in which you told me excitedly that you would be moving to NYC to study marketing and work in advertisement for the next two years and I sat there smiling quietly in an all white apartment while you attempted to feed me chicken soup. I didn't really say much but I smiled and understood and didn't cry even though the dream has left me with utter sadness now that I've awakened. You seemed so happy and determined and innocent and perfect. All I could do was smile and be happy for you but deep down I felt this part of my soul missing and I definitely had the understanding in the dream that you may have all the best intentions but I am filled with doubt about where I stand and whether I'll ever see you again. I may not cry every day now but I'm still missing you so much and want everything for you to be wonderful and perfect and never cause you any strife. You are filled with so much love and desire and beauty and intellect, you should be pursuing whatever you can. Maybe that's where my sadness stems from as well - seeing you not fulfilling all those things I know you're capable of. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I just want you to be the best for yourself. I still love you and will always love you, no matter what or where we are.
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