its been too long my friend.
things have changed much since the last time i have talked to you.
my ex fiance cheated on me for the third time (that i knew of) and we broke up.
I still want to be with him......
but i feel like my long ago ex: I stil love him even though he dicked me over so many times, but he is so confusing with me and if he wants to still be in a relationship.
i have been partying since we broke up---i never did that before.
but i didnt.
i could have stopped him.
...i just sat there.
and went along with it.
i feel so disgusted with myself.
i knew somethign like that would happen.
so to try and take my mind of that i went outside for a few hours and took pictures.
i have some good ones.
but i dont have my laptop to edit them. :(
its kind of weird.
im trying not to think about it
but its difficult.
i dont know what to do about it.
just hide in my room.
until hes not there anymore probably.
i wont say anything.
other than what i have said.
well since i broke up with him...
i got back into them
he told me that i need to slow down...
that ive been doing too many..
i dont care
"theyre gonna eat holes into your brain"
"good, maybe ill die faster"
"please..just think about what i said"
so ive thought.
and yea, im broke.
so no more percs for me.....
and then i can hang out with......another one...
maybe this weekend will help to make next week better....
i just want to get away from everything ----him----
it was fucked up when my best friends' ex cheated on her with autumn, but now that my NOW ex (of a short lived 9 months) cheated on me (twice---once with a sophomore whore now a freshmen slut) with her, that bitch is going down
Heres the story:
Monday morning my friend nicole let me know in 2nd period that i should check his phone
"i think You have a right to know"
" they have been talking quite frequently"
"i swore not to tell"
after the bell i ventured out to find him. i got his phone but he wouldnt let me keep it. he then at a moment said he didnt want me to start shit. Thats when i froze.
"why would i need to start shit???"
he stopped talking, i walked away.
punched a locker.
fractured 2 of my knuckles.
after homeroom, looked for his punk ass again.
he was hiding, so i dragged him out of class and demanded to know who it was and what the heck had happened
"nothing. we passed out on the same bed thats it. and we talked on the phone a bit."
"autumn..... thats her name i dont know the rest"
punched another locker.
and fractured two more.
I'll continue the rest during my lunch, for now, all i have left to look forward to is some pills, and now im going to seeth and plot against her.
iwait. i just realized this is a world of skanks and bitches. me, i think im more of a bitch, but less slutty.. but. define skank, and/or bitch.... SKANK-someone who tries to act like a whore, but really bitchy, and doesnt have the balls to do whatever the fuck they want. BITCH-a female dog, who sleeps with lots of boy /and or girl dogs.she also is a little sslut , but more skanky. yeah!!!!! bitch, ahma cutchoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
omfg. i totally hate myself. why am i such a fuckin bitch?WHY!!!!!!!!???????
anywho.like idkw, but im really pissed at my bf. for no reason. other than on friday i was in the worst mood ever, so that didnt help much. am i wrong to ignore him? prolly. oh well. idk wtf id do w/o him
yeah brit isnt even here..... i havent even seen her all day.
i think im gonna go die. maybe not. idk. MOOOOOOOSE!!!! damn. life really does suck, eh?omg, shes here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAYAYAYAYAY!!!
I have a really ANNOYING song stuck in my head, just guess. heard that sound by MXPX. holy sh*it they suck some balls. yayayayayayay, i cannot wait for HIM's new cd to come out. total orgasm.