's Blog |
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| Take This To Your [Headphones]
| | Desperate Times, Desperate Measures |
Please God,
Let me stop fucking up.
I'm ready for life.
It's so good.
I'm ready for it.
This ringing in my ear, It's so unclear, so unclear
I hear them talking, but can't make out the words
Speak up, Speak clear
I hear them talking, but can't make out the words
Speak up, Speak clear
Where have I been, What terrible company,
With zero apologies
My God, where have I been, Where have I been
When I sink to the bottom,
I'll Sing out as it fills with water
I hope I've done enough
When this thing breaks, I will be you, you will be me | | Tags: Underoath, Personal Life |
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| | Conundrum |
"i am in love with everything that is broken and sometimes,
i like it that what's broken, is in love with me." - petey
I decided to leave the comfort and safety of what I knew for the past 5 years
and take a chance on real life.
I want to be challenged.
I want to feel passion.
I want to wake up without wanting.
I want to be understood.
I don't want to make this about you.
But it usually always is.
It's always about all of you.
I want to believe that all of this will come together someday
That I can build a life that I'm proud of.
Believe.
We all need a reason to. | | Tags: Life, Love, The Pursuit of Happiness. |
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| | The Future |
I made my choice
I made my decision
I am speechless
I am alone.
No hope
Oh no home
Because maybe I'm a fake
Maybe you're to blame
Maybe I'm a star--Stumbling drunk light
My mistakes I've made won't leave me alone
And if you don't find me on the front page
Find a way to say that you saw me
And if you don't find me in a movie
Find a way to say that you knew me
You and I got lost along the way
But this will end some day some way
And if you don't find me at all
Then I won't care
If I could find a place for the holiday
Maybe I would call
You're a payphone away
From the mess that I've become
I'm destroying what I love | | Tags: Wonderless, Pierce the Veil, Personal, Life |
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| | Desperate. |
Now that I'm stuck in the city with the spring rolling in, it's so hard because I don't know where to begin. But there's just never much time these days and I've been up all night trying to say I've got, got to get this off of my chest.
I'm so sick of living my life in suspense.
Focused on getting my life rearranged,
and you're god damn right my life has changed.
30+ Myspace Blog entries
Not talking to me for months...for over a year.
2 Years of Heartache
*Mind over [YOU DON'T] Matter*
Going over
and over
and over
in my head what the fuck I did wrong
Never being able to trust guys that I meet
--Seeing you in every guy I meet--
Still never trusting guys
I'm not the same person
I will NEVER be that girl again.
And here you are.
"Well I just don't know how serious your relationship is with a guy you dont really see much and I don't want you to feel uncomfortable with that ya know...but I got to thinking and realized i should still be hanging out with you if i can and talking to you because...well i liked to"
So, you missed me huh?
NEWS FLASH:
We are not the same people.
You will never understand me the same way again.
I refuse to re-open that door--to re-open my heart to you.
...To pretty much anyone for that matter...
It is not worth the pain that I am barely over.
These wounds go deeper than bones,
and you, SIR, are the biggest mind fuck I ever met.
Dear DJ,
It's fucking over.
Love,
Me. | | Tags: The worst person ever, Valencia, Life, Personal |
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| | I Can't See Myself |
If we can forget just what was said
Maybe then we can pretend
That all of our lives will be perfect in the end
Take our time, maybe we'll grow up
But you'll learn from what you've done
You might believe in what you see
But no, it never made sense to me
--------
I'm so sick of closing my eyes
That I can't see myself getting to sleep tonight
'Cause all these dreams are locked in my mind
And they'll keep me awake for days at a time
I have a strong feeling that Valencia's sophomore release will be quoted for the rest of the summer
I feel my life in the lyrics.
| | Tags: Valencia, lyrics, music, Personal Life |
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| | Breakdown |
And I have lost my mind.
And I am lost in time.
I can barely think of anything straight.
And I can barely feel anything real.
So when I save you
You'll save me too.
I wish there was an easy solution.
I feel like I'm suffocating under all of this pressure.
Breathe
Breathe
Breathe. | | Tags: FTSK, Life, Personal |
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| | Echo |
I have never felt so alone or betrayed.
Tonight I feel like I have nothing.
In regards to love
In regards to my family
How can this be my life?
Sally Owens: [Sally's letter to Gillian] Sometimes I feel like there's a hole inside of me, an emptiness that at times seems to burn. I think if you lifted my heart to your ear, you could probably hear the ocean. The moon tonight, there's a circle around it. Sign of trouble not far behind. I have this dream of being whole. Of not going to sleep each night, wanting. But still sometimes, when the wind is warm or the crickets sing... I dream of a love that even time will lie down and be still for. I just want someone to love me. I want to be seen. I don't know. Maybe I had my happiness. I don't want to believe it but, there is no man, Gilly. Only that moon. | | Tags: Life, Family, Humans, Personal |
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| | Real Life |
Andrew Largeman: Fuck, this hurts so much.
Sam: I know it hurts. But it's life, and it's real. And sometimes it fucking hurts, but it's life, and it's pretty much all we got.
Sam: You don't realize, this is good, this doesn't happen often in your life. We can work this stuff out. I want to help you, you know? We need each other...
Andrew Largeman: This isn't a conversation about this being over, it's, it's... I'm not, like, putting a period at the end of this, you know, I'm putting, like, an ellipsis on it, cause I'm- I'm- I'm worried that if I don't figure myself out, if I don't go like land on my own two feet, then I'm just gonna to mess this whole thing up, and this is too important. I gotta go... you changed my life in four days. This is the beginning of something really big. But right now, I gotta go.
I'm fucked.
What will become of all this? | | Tags: Garden State, Life, Matters of the Heart |
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| | This is How We Lived. |
I've been thinking, let's get out of this party yeah let's flee
These kids never meant much to me
I'll get this started, first shot is the hardest to deal with
So let's sober up on the drive home
Let's go some place where the cops will leave us alone
And we'll stay out all night
'Cause rest is for the dead
So we won't stop, no we won't stop
Raise your glass high
And let's throw out a toast to the road, where ever we go
We'll hold friends close and never want to go home
I've been hearing you've been talking to my man all wrong
Giving us looks all night long
Get your coat, time to go, hit the road
You can find us hiding in headstones
So let's sober up on the drive home
Let's go some place where the cops will leave us alone
'Cause tonight is like you and I
So alive and too young, too young to die
Stay out all night
'Cause rest is for the dead
So we won't stop, no we won't stop
Raise your glass high
And let's throw out a toast to the road, where ever we go
We'll hold friends close and never want to go home
Let's break the bottles in well lit parking lots
I know it's not much but it's all I've got
We'll break the bottles in well lit parking lots
I know it's not much but it's all we've got
Maybe it's corny, but College was the best four years of my life.
I lived, for the most part, by my own rules
I hung out with my best friends every day
Took part in all of my favorite clubs on campus
and stayed up all night, nearly every night with my best friends.
This is what we had,
and these guys captured it.
| | Tags: Stay Out, Hit the Lights, College, Friends, Life |
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| | It probably should happen. |
So stay up and get down
Sleep's just time spent wasting time
So get down, get down
Let's make it happen all night
Reach out touch someone
So try to catch me if you can
Reach out touch someone
Touch someone (touch me)
Occasionally I daydream
It's almost as if you're really here
but nothing will compare to the real thing.
Maybe soon. | | Tags: The Maine, Life, Daydreaming |
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| | Take Time to Reallize |
And if you only knew the truth
About how I miss you
All the time
Waking up without you by my side
Only seems to me the hardest part
Of my day
Besides laying down and dreaming about
The possibilities
Between life and happiness
I can't tell you everything because it scares me to death.
What do you really want to hear?
That I hold back every day from crying for you?
Out of frustration?
Out of adoration?
I don't know if I'm asleep or awake most days
But at least you leave me with the feeling that I still have a heart that beats
Because just the sound of your laugh makes it race in my chest.
I'm here on the other line
Staring at the ceiling
We are sighs and laughter
and all we have is this
This moment. | | Tags: "A Life in Pictures", Promise of Redemption, Life |
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| | Don't Break The Ice |
All we really need is hope that there could be a possibility
Once you try and run with it, then it's all a gamble.
Maybe we shouldn't try to take things so personally.
Maybe we were better off as curious strangers.
Well fuck it, I'm already hooked.
You've got anything left? | | Tags: Life, lust, friends, strangers, you, me, and dupree? |
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| | So this is Growing Up? |
So, I watched The Starting Line play their last two songs ever at Bamboozle this year.
Now, I was never into TSL during their high points. But I was a kid that was effected by "Best of Me".
You don't have to be a fan of TSL to understand the importance of that song and their effect on the music scene and kids of that time.
I watched as they ended their last song for the last set for the time being.
I'll admit it...I was choked up.
This is more than just The Starting Line going on a "break"...this is about an end of an era...for many bands of that genre.
This is about Growing Up.
Bands are moving forward in different directions in their life--getting married, starting families, going solo...I guess we all are.
It's been a year since I've graduated college...it's almost mind blowing.
I still feel like I'm on Summer Vacation waiting to go back.
Listening to the "Direction" album on the way home, I realized how much it deals with growing up and the uncertainty about the future.
I felt so close to it.
I will be 23 on the 20th.
Life is moving at a rapid pace.
As for those of you who didn't get to see it, there's a ton of videos of The Starting Line's final performance. Here's a video (not mine) of "Best of Me".
I hope you watch and feel just as close as I did to that moment and everyone around me.
"We got older but we're still young
we never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up"
| | Tags: Life, Growing Up, The Starting Line, Best Of Me |
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| | Last Night |
It's twelve o' clock and I need your attention
It's like the alcohol making my head spin
Your scent is the rum. the room is a bottle
Keeping me hopeless 'til I wake tomorrow
And if tonight ever makes a difference
The way that I feel the way that I'll remember it
I'll take this down until the glass remains
Swallow the words that I was meant to say
One drink to remember...another to forget
In the morning it's all still there
Waiting for me.
Is this ever going to sort itself out?
Can we be fixed? | | Tags: Life, Love, Issues, The Cab |
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| | Breaking Point |
And I, I count down seconds till these playwrights will save me
From a feeling I feel that has certainly made me
Oh, you know it's certainly made me
Too upset to describe, how when I close my eyes
You're sitting right beside me on this bed here tonight
You know I'd have to say to you
How fast can you have your bags packed?
I'm ready to blow this town
Friendships are less important, I'm going to feel let down
Cause one thing, between road signs and street lights
When I shut my eyes to the world outside
It's just another thought of you and I
I don't care about the consequences.
It's about saving what little spark of me I have left.
| | Tags: New life--where are you? |
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