Almost done reading Cosmic Trigger, which I think everyone should read...about 20 pages left still, then I start the second book.
I've been renovating Tamsin's parents back deck, a job that went from replacing 6 rotted boards, to installing a completely new deck. Not the most fun thing to do, but I am enjoying myself, it feels rewarding to build something. it's about 75% done, maybe one more day of work...
Which brings me to our next topic, back pains. I have them. I feel like an 80 year old man...a couple days ago I couldnt even stand up straight.
We went and played the private show for our Video Contest winners, here's a video:
At this point, I have become completely nocturnal.
I have always heard people say that they're "losing sleep" when referring to a stressful situation, but I never fully experienced "losing sleep" over something until about five days ago. I stay awake until my body shuts down, and then I wake and repeat.
I have never felt so out of control of my life as I do right now. It's pretty uncomfortable knowing that someone may or may not have complete control of my destiny right now. It's humbling, and at the same time it has pissed me off beyond belief.
I guess the important lesson I am trying to teach you, is to be free as long as you can. Make a point of it, because one day, you won't be free. When that day comes, you will know exactly what I feel right now. Maybe you will enjoy the feeling, but at this very moment, I do not.
I feel trapped and I think I am losing my mind. My free mind.
Today, I got my check in the mail from Caps, the company that pays me for being an extra in TV shows and movies. $77 and some change, and just as fast as it enters my shallow pocket, it exits.
Everyone is right, the new Manchester Orchestra album is nothing short of amazing. It reminds me of Jimmy Eat World so damn much.
Speaking of Jimmy's, my neighbor Jimmy and his girlfriend Jen told me they were moving back to Michigan almost immediately. Monday morning.
I got to practice today quite early in the day, putzed around at the space for a while before we started, smoked a lot of cigarettes, my relief from the stressed state my mind has been in these last few days.
I love being at the practice space, though it is probably the most filthy and disease ridden place I have ever been. It is so dirty and nasty, but it is my home. And more literally, the home of my band.
Today we worked on a couple of our new songs before we assembled a set list for our upcoming tour. It is as follows:
Pagan Melodies (New)
Dancing With the Devil
Hold Your Breath (New)
One Track Mind, Four Track Heart
Sympathy For the Living (New)
Enough Is Enough
Tennessee Song Part 2
The Roads You Can Take
This is not the exact order of the set, but I'm surprised I even remembered all ten in the first place.
We set out for tour May 20th and we wont be back home for quite a while. I'm excited and anxious. But upset that I will be leaving Tamsin alone again.
After practice, Jimmy, Jen and I went to Foodsmart and got a 30 pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon, the beer of choice here in Chicago. We threw a couple back at my place and then set off on an adventure to my personal heaven, The Wiener Circle. Quite possibly the best hot dog joint in all the land.
Only at this establishment can you pay $20 for a "chocolate milkshake" and get your moneys worth. If you don't know what I'm talking about, then you clearly have never been to Wiener Circle and don't deserve to know what I'm talking about.
As we were leaving I noticed a bunch of dumb drunk idiots getting out of their really nice and expensive Jaguar. After they walked away, I noticed that their nice expensive Jaguar had been keyed on the driver's side door and when I got into our car I noticed a really heavy Jaguar hood ornament in my coat pocket. Weird.
Today I realized something very important:
I have not been myself lately. And I realized tonight I have awoken for this idiot slumber I have been in and that I am back. I hate the rich and embrace my poverty. There's an understanding I made with myself tonight, to not forget what I stand for. To work hard for little recognition and love every second of it. One day, someone will appreciate the things I have done and will be affected by my actions. If only one person changes, or one set of eyes open in the world because of me, I will lie in my grave content.
So it's Saturday, about 7:30 in the morning, I was outside smoking my before bed cigarette, when I hear 6 gunshots, that sounded fairly close, then a car speeding off, followed by two more gunshots...
Tonight has been an awesome movie night, there was some kind of Sci-Fi movie marathon on EncoreHD, and the first movie I watched was a flick called Videodrome, peep the clip below, very trippy:
This is my favorite David Cronenberg movie, and James Woods, and Debbie Harry are in it.
Speaking of Debbie Harry, I was recently informed that Debbie Harry played the weird dike in the movie Spun. How could someone who was so attractive in their youth turn out to be so creepy looking later in life?
Anyway, after that was the original Planet Of The Apes, which surprisingly, I had never seen before. It was really entertaining. I really love Charlton Heston's character in this movie, such a bad ass. And let's not forget how hot Linda Harrison is dressed all primitive like she is in the movie. Meeeeeeow.
I should have called the movie to follow those two: 2001: A Space Odyssey.
One of my favorite Kubrick films, I didn't flip out the first few times I saw the movie, because the best scene in near the end, and I would always fall asleep. But, I got really stoned one night and all of the sudden this happened...please watch, you wont be disappointed:
On an HD tv, paired up with Bluray and pot, this scene is honestly the most profound thing you could ever experience. Although, on the youtube above, Bjork is synced up with the film...I guess I let that slide to keep you sucked in til the good parts.
Stanley Kubrick did the liquid stuff with colored paints and a macro lens in his bathroom. Amazing.
So today, as soon as I woke up, I got dressed and drove to Pita Pit, got some pitas from there and came back home, and immediately devoured them.
Next up, was being an extra in the TV show 'State of Romance' with Bobby Lee again.
Al and Ryan from Empires were there yet again as well.
This time I actually stayed.
After sitting around from 7:30pm to 12:30am, Cody and I were finally called to be in the shot, the scene was outside of a bar, and Lee's character and three girls are talking outside the bar, and then they walk in, in turn Cody and I walk in directly after them. So...even though the episode they're filming is only a pilot, if it gets picked up, watch for us on NBC.
We wrapped from the extra gig at around 2:30 in the morning, Cody and I walked down Clark doing graffiti and then Tamsin and Jaz picked us up on the side of the road.
We proceeded to go to Dominick's to get some microwave food, directly following that we dropped Jaz and Cody off, got home and ate our food while watching Idle Hands with Seth Green, Devon Sawa and Jessica Alba.
Now, Meat Binge Day, I decided at some point during the week before we leave for tour, I'm going to have a day solely devoted to eating as much meat as I possible can. Is meat poisoning possible? Anyway, my reason for this is kind of a last hurrah for eating meat. As of late it has been making me feel really sick and shitty.com. So after said 'Day of Meat,' I will eat meat nevermore, nevermore.
Now I am going to probably watch another movie whilst I fall asleep.
Best thing happened to me today, I ate Chipotle with Tamsin.
Actually the best thing that happened to me today was GETTING PULLED OVER FOR A BROKEN TAIL LIGHT IN MY GIRLFRIENDS CAR, WHEN SHE HAD THE INSURANCE PAPERWORK IN HER WALLET AT WORK AND MY LICENSE IS EXPIRED! I swear, I feel like female cops have more testosterone than male cops. Does anybody agree with me on that one? Best part was when she asked me why I was arrested in June. No wait, it wasn't the best part, I distinctly remember her asking me if had a BOMB in the car...dumbass.
Anyways, we all went to Home Depot today and bought a huge 15'x12' canvas for a backdrop we're gonna put up during our set. It's gonna look tight, were gonna paint 1997 in red at the top and were gonna project stuff on it while we play our set during shows. So...uh...get ready for that. By the way, we need a projector...
Ugh...I don't even know what's going on tomorrow, oh yeah, I'm going to be an extra again for that TV show, so I should have something interesting to write about.
You know how sometimes, when you read a book or hear a song, or even see a certain movie, and it changes you? Or opens your eyes in a certain way?
I think that happened to me today. Again.
I'm glad that there are other people who are a step ahead of me in life, because if it weren't for those people, I don't think I'd be where I am today.
I'd probably still be somewhere in Chesterfield, Michigan...living in in parents house, working some monotonous job, going to like....community college...being boring.
I mean...man, I'm broke as hell and there's a lot of things I would love to change about my life, but damn, being here, now sure beats being there, then. And as for the things I'd like to change...I think I'm gonna change them.
In the Beatle's 'Yellow Submarine' movie, there's a segment that talks about how long one minute actually is:
I think that is one of the most important parts of that film. It's hard to keep that idea in mind all the time, but I think it would be worth it to try.
yesterday the only thing i really did was go see the faint.
i woke up, then caleb, jaz, cody and i went to jimmy o's house.
we hung out and talked for a short while before we headed back to my house, on foot.
lots of walking occurred.
we were on the hunt for sunshine, but we never did quite get it...
cody and i met up with bryan bose and his girlfriend lauren, then the four of us took a bus and a train to the metro, where the faint and ladytron were playing together.
i love the lights and projections that the faint uses, it's really intense. we're definitely, hopefully going to be working on our live show soon, so all you rave heads that come out to the 1997 shows, get ready, some weird shit is going to be going down soon. we already have this liquid light show we can project, but i think we're talking about actually gathering odd footage and projecting that instead of just a liquid light show...
after the show we went across the street from the metro and ate at the hot dog place, the hot dog place where i always order a taco on a pita...so good. munch down hard.
when we were out smoking, we saw our friend cassie hard at work next door to metro at the full shilling. we got to sit at the bar and drink a lot of only a little bit of money. thats always a good situation.
long story short, as you can tell from my two previous posts, i was drunk. maybe a little too drunk...i cant be sure.
Woke up around 1:30pm...that is in the afternoon if you're new to what we call "time"...
It's hard to get out of bed when Theraflu is so thick in your veins.
Got dressed and ready for action, Caleb, Cody and I were going to be extras in a new tv show on NBC called "State Of Romance." We saw that chubby asian guy from MadTV, Bobby Lee.
So we get to the holding room, where all the extras meet, and Caleb quickly decides he doesn't want to be an extra anymore. If you've ever been an extra, you know that most of the time, you're not in front of the camera, but rather sitting in a room packed with dumb people somewhere for hours.
Caleb dips out.
By the way, Al and Ryan from the band Empires were also there with us, being extras as well.
Cody and I decide we want to leave too, so we do. We just fucking leave.
We go back to my house and watch MMA with Tamsin, Jaz, Caleb and Ryan Farrell (who has over night...lost all of his facial hair and looks like a little boy).
Nick hit us up via his girlfriend Audrey's phone, and we meet for practice.
We ended up smoking a resin bowl and that gave us the perfect edge we need to rework the verses on a song we came up with that just wasn't clicking yet. It sounds totally different now and makes me want to cum in my pants, metaphorically.
Kevin, having his wisdom teeth pulled out two days ago, decided in the name of friendship, to give us all one of his teeth. They are nasty as hell. "But they've been bleached, they're clean!"
We leave practice, hit up the BK lounge and then carry on back to my house.
I get down HARD on my whopper w/cheese, but I stop half way thru cause I think I am slowly realizing that eating meat is making me feel like absoluteshit.net.
At around 12:30 we get the itch to start going back to the TV show set to get paid. It's rainy and cold now, and Cody, Caleb and I are jonzing to get some graffiti done before we go back.
We park down the street from the shoot and listen to the Sgt. Peppers album for a little bit, then we exit the car in a fashionably manner and start off on our journey of public property defacement. We are walking through this strip mall at the North Ave, Milwaukee and Damen intersection in Wicker Park towards an alley and in the window of a massage parlor Cody spots this crazy asian girl with no pants on, and he's yelling, "dude I fucking swear, I just saw someone creeping around in the WITH NO PANTS ON!"
So we're all trying to scope this crazy shit out and snap a picture to blog, but she was quicker than that old guy from Karate Kid...ninja fast. Weird as hell, right?
I'm sure she was a prostitute. 100% sure of it. No Doubt. Don't Speak.
I came home, gave Tamsin a back rub with both of us topless, and now I'm watching 'Cash In The Attic' and falling asleep.