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RetiredArtists Demonstrates the Sad State of the Music Industry

Posted by - 06:09 PM on 03/14/13
A site called RetiredArtists has popped up. Boasting musicians who have been in bands that were "signed and toured extensively, on labels ranging from Victory Records to Bridge 9 Records," the service offers discreet songwriting for the musically challenged.
What do we do? We make it easy for that guy who wants to sing in a metal, hardcore, punk or rock band (but doesnít have the music-writing friend to help him) write songs. We also make it easy for someone struggling with writing their own music in a band get consistent by writing songs that they can learn, as theirs, and branch off from there.

How do we do it? You tell us what style you want your songs in based on specific bands, and we will write you songs.

The best part? Everything is discreet. Nobody will know. Why play your shitty songs when you can play consistent amazing ones written by us badass guys who toured in (and with) bands whose names would make you nut yourself.
 
Displaying posts 1 - 15 of 117
06:11 PM on 03/14/13
#2
Alex DiVincenzo
www.alexislegend.com
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06:14 PM on 03/14/13
#3
irthesteve
All that wander are not lost
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this is very strange
06:17 PM on 03/14/13
#4
billyboatkid
The Protagonist of Loneliness
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It might have been cool if it wasn't so full of itself.
06:17 PM on 03/14/13
#5
Loveisa4lttrwrd
stuff
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If you need to use this website might I suggest doing literally anything else besides trying to write music.
06:17 PM on 03/14/13
#6
pepster50
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this is really bizarre ahha
06:19 PM on 03/14/13
#7
The_Effort
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If you need to use this website might I suggest doing literally anything else besides trying to write music.

This this this.
06:20 PM on 03/14/13
#8
harveyn590
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oh the vastly different music on victory compared to that of bridge 9.
06:28 PM on 03/14/13
#9
imajerk
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what a joke
06:29 PM on 03/14/13
drewbaldy
phanyes1 doesn't suck
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It might have been cool if it wasn't so full of itself.

Good god this.
06:29 PM on 03/14/13
mka12992
polarisamour.bandcamp.com
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06:33 PM on 03/14/13
trevorshmevor
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It might have been cool if it wasn't so full of itself.

Yup, agreed. Yikes.
06:35 PM on 03/14/13
panties_nz
halfyearsun
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im willing to put money forward for a like an ap.net collab with these guys
06:39 PM on 03/14/13
Mudkip
Joe Barone
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Can't wait until someone dicks them over and posts who they are.
06:42 PM on 03/14/13
Spartan789013
I have unpopular opinions
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"Give a man a fish, he eats for a day."

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