I'm sorry it's long, but this was my 11th take and I just wanted to make sure I could somehow get even a bit of what I wanted to say to the boys through!
Thank you so much AP.net for making this contest.
Gerard, Mikey, Frank, and Ray,
Thank you so much for being there and helping me through everything.
I hope you guys are able to watch this video and understand that you are amazing human beings.
Even if I don't win, I just want you guys to know that it means the world to me that you'll see this and know that you (and Green Day, can't forget them!!) are the best thing to ever happen to me.
The first time i saw heard there music was when i was watching my countries music channel called C4. "I'm not okay" came on and i can remember my eyes being fixated on Gerards sexy black hair. I had never seen anyone who looked like this, dressed like this andf his voice just blew me away. The song made me feel like he was speaking directly to me and i fell in love. i remained glued to that t.v for the video's entirity. Ever since that moment i fell in love with MCR i did anything i could to get their CD's and getting there merch has been my only birthday / xmas presents for 7 years now.[IMG]file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/fifi/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/moz-screenshot.png[/IMG]
MCR has literally saved my life twice. I have suffered many harships in my short 17 years and their music has been my best tool in surviving.Their dvd LOTMS was the best thing that could have happened. seeing Gerard go through all those ups and downs and his advice gave me the strength to go on.
When I first heard My Chemical Romance I was 13. I was just beginning to enter Middle School and having a rough time, all the people I thought were my friends in elementary entirely abandoned me for cliques, and at the time I wasn't very out going. When I hit middle school it was like starting back at square one, and I started to become really depressed and afraid I would never make any new friends. Some of the first people I met had similar views and likes in music that I did, and a friend suggested I check out this website that had a bunch of interesting music. I logged on and found the song "Honey, this mirror isn't big enough for the two of us," and instantly I wanted more. The way the music sounded, was as angry as I felt when people talked about the way I dressed, or how I looked. And to be frank, in Middle school I didn't give a fuck, but I did. When I finally saved up the money, I ran out and bought "I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love." And when I first listened to it I didn't know what to think, so I placed it on my mantel and waited until it felt right. About a week later I stopped doing much of anything in my classes, and I stopped talking to the people I was starting to make friends with. I started to become deeply depressed and couldn't make myself feel better unless I cut myself, or painted all of my feelings out. One night I locked myself in my room and began drawing, I was in what felt like a spiral of never ending depression, over the loss of my grandfather, having no one I felt I could confide in, and knowing that eventually I would have to give up art to become something my parents wanted me to be. That night I decided something had to give, I was either going to get over this and make something of myself, or this was my last drawing. I left all of my brushes on top of my mantel in an old cup, and that's when I found "I brought you my bullets." I placed it in my cd player and started to violently attack the paper. I didn't care what I was making I just knew that somehow everything bad in me had to come out and the music helped me find where it was hiding. That night I fell asleep with "Demolition Lovers" on repeat in my headset. The next day, I had started to draw in my math class, because I wanted to be an artist and didn't see the point in it, and that's when some one next to me said "Hey I like your art!" I turned and saw a girl who was also doodling in a sketch book. We quickly became friends, and it wasn't long before we were inseparable, but she was also going through some deep emotional issues. We confided in each other and talked about as much as we could together. We both became huge My Chemical Romance fans, and soon enough people were calling us names again, thinking back we shouldn't have let this bug us, but it did. One night I went to her house and we just started blasting music and creating art, no one said anything. "I brought you My Bullets," had just played through and her cd's changed, and that's when I heard "Adam's Song" by Blink 182. I had heard Blink before, but I wasn't familiar with their older music, and this to me was one of the first times, I ever listened to Blink. She and I blasted Blink and MCR the rest of the night and drew out everything, until we eventually couldn't draw anymore.
We stayed close into high school and we both still listened to MCR and Blink. We were both active members in the MCRmy as well. She and I had both seen MCR many times and every time I would see My Chemical Romance I would hand paint a custom design just for that show. I had entered as many things into my MCRmy log as possible, living in a small town meant that hardly any one knew who the bands were, let alone care about anything that wasn't country music, but we both still tried. Then one day I went home and checked my e-mail and saw a congratulations e-mail. I began to read it and all I could do was scream! I had been awarded a meet and greet with My Chemical Romance during the Black Parade tour. The only thing I could do was cry, because every member in the band was my hero. They also allowed my best friend to go with me to the meet and greet and all we could do the whole time was smile. My best friend and I are still close even though we are so far away. She went on to do music, and I went on to do art. I am now in my Senior year at art school, and will be graduating with a focus in Industrial Design. I can honestly say, that with out My Chemical Romance, Blink 182, and my best friend Nikki, I wouldn't be alive today, and I wouldn't be doing what I really enjoy.
Thank you for everything MCR and Blink182, and thank you for your time.
(attached is the t-shirt design I hand painted when I got to meet My Chemical Romance, a picture of my best friend Nikki as Frank and me as Gerard for Halloween when we were in Highschool, and a picture of me 2 years ago as The Rumor for Halloween)
When I was about 8, Ally and AJ came on America's Got Talent and played Chemicals React. My sister, who was babysitting me, was in the other room, so I called out for her and told her they were playing to see if maybe she wanted to see it. She apparently misheard me, cause she ran into the room yelling," OMYGAWD MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE!!! GERARDWAY GIGO *unintelligible fangirling*
Wait. Who are THEY!?" She wasn't pleased.
That was during Revenge.
When I was 11, I watched Twilight song parodies, where they take scenes of the movie and put them to appropriate music, almost all summer. They had Teenagers and Blood in one of them. After that, I spent my time on YouTube listening to Blood on loop and eventually graduated to Welcome to the Black Parade. Eventually, the summer ended and I forgot about MCR.
That was during Black Parade.
This April, my best friend, Leanna, spent the night at my house. The next morning, we were too lazy to get out of bed, so we spent two hours listening to music on her phone. Eventually, Cancer came on. A week later, I found myself searching that song on YouTube and begging Leanna to send me links to more videos. She sent me Na Na Na, Helena, Famous Last Words, I'm Not Okay, and Teenagers. Eventually, she got annoyed and told me to fend for myself- probably because I wrote an IM, long enough to be an essay, that described how significant I found Na Na Na to be. I found and listened to every other song, except for anything on Danger Days. She came over with her CD and we blasted it. We danced until we, quite literally, could not stand it. When Vampire Money started, I was standing in the corner of the right side of my bedroom. By the end of the song, I had collapsed on the left side. I headbanged myself into oblivion that night.
That was when I became a Killjoy.
Once upon a time, I was a very sheltered child not only living outside of any city, but outside the suburbs, even, happily listening to my mother’s Celine Dion and John Denver albums. I liked more popular music too, but like I said, I was sheltered, so I didn’t hear it very often- mostly when we had a substitute bus driver who would play something other than a country radio station. Then one day when I was in middle school, not very long after Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge came out, a friend of mine said to me, “Jen! I’ve completely fallen in love with this band I just discovered! They’re called My Chemical Romance. There’s this song- ‘To the End’- you’ve gotta hear it!” Or something to that effect, at least. And she wouldn’t shut up for weeks! Slowly, most of my other friends got on board, too. I still hadn’t, because I was too broke to buy the CD, and eventually another of my friends took pity on me and gave me a copy.
I listened to it, and I told my friends it was cool, because I didn’t want to offend them, but on the inside I was thinking, ‘What is this shit? I can’t even understand what this dude is saying! It’s completely unintelligible! How can you guys like this?’ However, I didn’t exactly get new CDs all the time, so I kept listening to it. I listened to it a lot. And then one day I realized that it had become my favorite album. I listened to it pretty much every day, and I sang along, and I couldn’t even begin to pick which song I loved the most, although I did like “To the End” at least as much as that first friend.
I was so in love. I listened to it when I was in a good mood and wanted to listen to something familiar and fun. I listened to it when I was in a bad mood and wanted to scream at the world, but couldn’t, so I let Gerard Way scream for me. My family had converted to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints when I was seven, and I listened to it when my parents wanted me to go to church or a youth meeting or sit through having the missionaries over for dinner, and I had to pretend to be a good little Mormon girl, had to fit my round self into this square hole and just pray to a God I didn’t really believe in that no one noticed, because I didn’t know how to tell anyone that my reluctance wasn’t just laziness making me hate three hour long services. I actually, genuinely didn’t believe. I just didn’t have that kind of faith in me, and I very strongly disagreed with the church’s anti-homosexuality stance.
Listening to that album during those times helped me to remember who I was. That I was different, and that that was not only okay, but a good thing. My parents and the church wouldn’t have approved of the album at all if they had known, but I knew that there was nothing wrong with it. I knew that under all of the swearing and bloody imagery, there wasn’t anything wrong about the underlying messages, and the band themselves were good guys. In a world full of plenty of asshole rock stars, I’d feel as safe on the My Chem tour bus as in my own living room, then and now.
A lot of people like to say that the band saved their life. When I was a sophomore in high school and swallowed as many pills as I could stand, the only thing that saved me that night was that I threw them all up before they could do any damage. The thing that kept me from doing it again every time my depression got really bad again was the realization I had that night that as much as I might not want to live anymore, I was even more afraid of dying. I saved my own life. I still battle with my depression sometimes, and I save my own life every time. My Chemical Romance had nothing to do with saving my life. But their music helped me deal with living it.
Also, their music is really awesome. Seriously. I love this band for making music that helped me through some rough times, but I love them even more for just making really awesome music. It wouldn’t have been such a help if it wasn’t completely awesome. I could listen to it all day. Actually, I have listened to it all day. I’ve never come across another band as artistic and energetic and also brilliant enough to make me have ridiculous amounts of fun listening to a song about war and going to hell (Here’s to you, “Mama”!). Also, ray guns, seriously. How awesome can they get?