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Blake Solomon

Written by: Blake Solomon (12/08/09)
wisdomI guess the one thing we learned this year is that I am always right. Whatever I say typically becomes law and there's nothing you can do about it. Don't like these albums; I don't care. But also don't be surprised if a knock comes to your door and there's 3 or 4 surly looking men in riot gear waiting for you through the peephole. They may or may not be working for me (it kind of depends on your current tax situation). These men do not understand reason. They also don't understand English, but that's just a money thing (see previous parentheses on tax situations). My riot gear dudes do have a safe word, though. And because you're reading this list, I'm going to tell you: Tacky. Since I'm (clearly) freeballing this whole stupid story, and since the first word that came to my mind was "tacky," I think I'm just going to stop. Hug a family member this holiday season. And not one of those one-armed bro hugs. Go in for the real thing. Love.


My 30 Favorite Albums of 2009

1.) The Dangerous Summer - Reach for the Sun

2.) Alexander the Great - Faces Change

3.) Transit - Stay Home EP

4.) We Were Promised Jetpacks - These Four Walls

5.) Why? - Eskimo Snow

6.) Set Your Goals - This Will Be the Death of Us

7.) Metavari - Be One of Us and Hear No Noise

8.) Years - Years

9.) MT. - Teach Your Children How to Think Not What to Think

10.) fun. - Aim and Ignite

11.) So Many Dynamos - The Loud Wars

12.) The Avett Brothers - I and Love and You

13.) Harlem Shakes - Technicolor Health

14.) Fake Problems - It's Great to be Alive

15.) Freelance Whales - Weathervanes

16.) Suckers - Suckers EP

17.) Mansions - New Best Friends

18.) Deer Tick - Born on Flag Day

19.) Islands - Vapours

20.) Person L - The Positives

21.) husband&wife - Dark Dark Woods

22.) Copy Haho - Bred for Skills and Magic

23.) Jay-Z - The Blueprint 3

24.) Mute Math - Armistice

25.) Memory Tapes - Seek Magic

26.) From Monument to Masses - On Little Known Frequencies

27.) Kid CuDi - Man on the Moon: The End of Day

28.) Great Lake Swimmers - Lost Channels

29.) Bayonets - Wishes & Wishes

30.) A.A. Bondy - When the Devil's Loose

Honorable Mentions AKA 31-40

The Twilight Sad - Forget the Night Ahead
Relient K - Forget and Not Slow Down
The Dodos - Time to Die
The Coast - Expatriate
Oceans - Nothing Collapses
Dance Gavin Dance - Happiness
Jeremy Enigk - OK Bear
Gifts from Enola - From Fathoms
If These Trees Could Talk - Above the Earth, Below the Sky
City of Ships - Look What God Did To Us

I LIKE TV

1.) Community (Thursdays on NBC)
2.) Modern Family (Wednesdays on ABC)
3.) The Wire (anytime on any illegal tv streaming site)
4.) Man Vs. Food (Wednesdays on Travel Channel)
5.) Greek (Mondays on ABC Family)
6.) KING OF QUEENS
7.) 30 Rock (if you don't know when this is on i hate you)
8.) Looking at myself brush my teeth in the mirror (naked. everyday.)

Favorite Person of 2009

1.) Me
Honorable Mention: Not you

Favorite Web Sites

1.) www.thesuperficial.com (gossip playas!)
2.) www.videogum.com (I wish to be Gabe.)
3.) www.ibelieveinadv.com (F**k consumerism)
4.) www.sporcle.com (How many one syllable countries are there in the world?)
5.) www.bestcrosswords.com (As if I couldn't be any sexier.)
6.) www.abduzeedo.com (bad grammar. great design.)
7.) porn (porn)

Best Category in Blake's 2009 Best Of List

1.) Favorite Person of 2009

Favorite Hate Crime of 2009

1.) Are you still reading this?

One album from 2008 that I wish I heard in 2008

1.) Driver F - Chase The White Whale

Favorite Predictions for 2010 That Will Certainly Not Come True

1.) Syphilis becomes cool again.
2.) Barack Obama's birth certificate is signed by "Ben Dover."
3.) Blake gets a girlfriend with huge boobs and moderate-to-low self-esteem
4.) Funny pop culture reference
5.) Blake gets a girlfriend
6.) One more self-deprecating thing.
7.) People won't figure out my "formula" for "humor."

What I'm Wearing as I Write This

1.) Socks
2.) thick coat of body hair

Shopping list for January 3rd, 2010

1.) Tortillas
2.) wheat bread
3.) disposable razors
4.) Coke Zero
5.) dry roasted peanuts
6.) detergent
7.) tampons

Best Movie of 2009 In Which My Mother Cried

1.) The Blind Side
Runner-Up: a movie that clearly my mother would not cry in. Like, let's say, Saw MCMXLLI

Favorite pictures that come up when you image search the word, "Weird"

1.)

2.)

3.)

4.)

5.)

bye.
 
Displaying posts 1 - 15 of 33
10:26 PM on 12/10/09
#2
Blake Solomon
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this post saved for baby jesus
05:06 PM on 12/11/09
#3
WhoSaidThat?
twitter.com/TiredOfSeth
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Dear God, Blake. Hahahaha
07:57 AM on 12/12/09
#4
Blake Solomon
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Dear God, Blake. Hahahaha
how did you find this?
10:40 AM on 12/12/09
#5
WhoSaidThat?
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Browsed through "articles", then I looked at the end of the year section. Was I not supposed to find this? I apologize.
11:23 AM on 12/13/09
#6
Blake Solomon
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Browsed through "articles", then I looked at the end of the year section. Was I not supposed to find this? I apologize.
interesting, i can't seem to duplicate how you found it. could you walk me through each step that landed you here. The 2009 list shows up nowhere when i search for it, even if i'm logged out.
11:42 AM on 12/13/09
#7
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interesting, i can't seem to duplicate how you found it. could you walk me through each step that landed you here. The 2009 list shows up nowhere when i search for it, even if i'm logged out.
Actually, I lied. I was going through one of the staff's post histories, trying to find a quote they posted that I liked (but couldn't remember where it was, just who it was), and I ended up finding that staff's (unfinished) eoty list. Whoops.

Sorry for getting caught fibbing. Didn't think it would be a big deal.

/hanging head in shame
12:49 PM on 12/13/09
#8
Blake Solomon
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Actually, I lied. I was going through one of the staff's post histories, trying to find a quote they posted that I liked (but couldn't remember where it was, just who it was), and I ended up finding that staff's (unfinished) eoty list. Whoops.

Sorry for getting caught fibbing. Didn't think it would be a big deal.

/hanging head in shame
it's not a big deal, i was just curious how you found it since it's hidden on the site. No worries, hope you enjoyed it.
10:35 PM on 12/21/09
#9
Imperfektion
All I need are sounds of ecstasy.
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Weird pictures are weird.
11:35 PM on 12/21/09
IamTheINDUSTRY
glory glory
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hahahaha...as usual yours is the funniest.
05:34 AM on 12/22/09
denissuxx
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Someone else put TDS first? Fucking awesome.

Also, funny list haha
09:36 AM on 12/22/09
zubinmoosa
Tonight I'm Burning Star IV
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One album from 2008 that I wish I heard in 2008

1.) Driver F - Chase The White Whale

yesyesyesyesyesyes
12:45 PM on 12/22/09
the1
Blink One Eighty Who??
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The least informative but by far the most amusing.
12:45 PM on 12/22/09
RonStoppable
yeezy season approachin
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Favorite list.
04:58 PM on 12/22/09
introduction
You're not real musician!
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hahahahahahahahahaha
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