Vampires Everywhere! - Lost in the Shadows
Record Label: Century Media Records
Release Date: April 13, 2010
Despite taking their name from The Lost Boys, Vampires Everywhere! have more in common with Twilight. Much like how that film is an insult to real monster movies, the California sextet is a poor excuse for a post-hardcore band. For reasons I’ll never understand (or perhaps just the almighty dollar), respected metal label Century Media Records signed these self-described outcasts. Lost in the Shadows, the group’s debut EP, features their first two songs: "Immortal Love" and "The Embrace."
How is it?
Vocalist Michael Vampire (the other members go by equally laughable monikers) used to sing for the pop punk band Love, She Wrote. Now that the genre is no longer marketable, he has hopped on the latest trend. His new vocal style includes screams and cheesy, auto-tuned vocals. Listeners over the age of 15 need not apply. The worst thing about about Vampires Everywhere! is not the music itself, or even the fact that they seem to put more effort into applying their make-up than writing songs, but rather the sad truth that the gimmick will undoubtedly sell. If this junk is passable as music these days, the world is in dire need of a Van Helsing to exterminate these Edward Cullen wannabes.
Want to start a band called Team Jacob? Doesn't matter what we sound like; as long as we wear enough make-up and have a name like that, we'll get a record deal.
I'm down. I'll be the hype man. I'll wear guyliner and hop around the stage and stick my hand out for all the 13 year old girls in the front to high five. After about a month of that, we'll have enough money to call it a career.
So glad you put this out there. Mad props. By the way that last line. Golden. You need to review more. God bless this review.
Haha thanks! I was quite proud of that last line. It's been difficult trouble finding things that inspire me enough to write to take the time to write a review during my busy semester, but this one was a no-brainer (in more ways than one).
The RIYL is terrible. And the review was pretty good. Short, but enough and to the point. I actually like this style of review. The "who?" part familiarises me with the band if I never heard of them. Cool.
To me, this is kinda sad. The music is supposed be meaningful to the performer. And if the band feels solely about money/conforming to the latest trend, then I'm losing hope.